Having served over thirty years in the RUC / PSNI I was medically retired with CPTSD. Dissociative Identity Disorder also evolved in me as a residue of CPTSD. I wrote a novel, 'The Bitter End of Dreams', through which I hoped to reflect the experiences of working class folk caught in the grip of a sectarian conflict. I set my story in Belfast, but replaced the Judeo-Christian god with that of Mithras. I also gave Northern Ireland an extra county. Such counterfactual alterations opened up for ...
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The Shrapnel Podcast is a Northern Ireland-based show created and hosted by Sam McIlwaine, Gareth Mulvenna and Graeme Hanna. It focuses on exploring the region’s complex past, particularly the legacy of the Troubles and its societal impacts. The podcast features in-depth conversations and interviews with voices often overlooked by mainstream media. Guests include historians, activists, former political prisoners, and community advocates, offering diverse perspectives on Northern Ireland’s hi ...
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'Who Are The Disloyal?' Northern Ireland and the Experience of Catholic Police Officers [TRAILER]
8:07
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8:07Forthcoming episode... Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank you. Médecins Sans FrontièresBy E.S. Haggan
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Northern Ireland, the Far-right and the Failure of Political Unionism
29:41
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29:41Sorry, just another impromptu episode, this time impassioned by the disenfranchised youth of our community being exploited by our organised crime groups and the far-right. This time we're othering many innocent people within our ethnic communities and allowing ourselves to be further exploited by fascists, bigots and racist demagogues. Click here i…
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Addendum for All the Elements of a Police State John Montague
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27:09Some additional musings I (typically!) omitted. This relates to the John Montague: All the Elements of a Police State episode, so listen to that before this. Many thanks! Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank you. Médecins Sans FrontièresBy E.S. Haggan
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'All the elements of a police state': John Montague's Ulster
52:48
52:48
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52:48A look at John Montague's short story, The Cry. Set in 1959 it offers an opportunity to examine Northern Irish policing practices during the 1950s and 60s. The impetus for Montague's story was his actual witnessing the assault of a young catholic man by members of the Ulster Special Constabulary (B Specials). As such, The Cry offers a window into c…
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Trailer for my next episode in which I take a look at new look nationalist attitudes towards policing in Northern Ireland prior to the Troubles. Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank you. Médecins Sans FrontièresBy E.S. Haggan
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State-Terrorism and PIRA's 'No Alternative' to violence: Part IV: 'To Die A Soldier's Death ... '
49:20
49:20
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49:20A look at the concept of 'state-terrorism' and if such is in itself rendered incoherent in a climate of violent insurrection. Also, the 'showcase ambushes' by British Special Forces. Were these not in effect the lethal confrontation of two opposing forces, one personifying the Irish Republican (understood?) risk of their own blood sacrifice, the ot…
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Another impromptu episode. This time about the Irish hip hop band Kneecap and the recent furore they've stirred. My reasons for talking about them will become evident. I've also added some memories about policing Divis. Kneecap row: police assessing ‘kill MP’ and ‘up Hamas, up Hezbollah’ footage Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or ques…
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State-Terrorism and PIRA's 'No Alternative' to violence: Part II: Utopia through Atrocity?
42:36
42:36
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42:36This episode further examines the Provisional IRA's assertion that there was no alternative to armed struggle. Works cited: White, Robert W., Provisional Irish Republicans: an Oral and Interpretive History, Westport, Greenwood Press, 1993 Hennessey, Thomas, Northern Ireland: the Origins of the Troubles, Dublin, Gill & Macmillan, 2005 Smith, Anthony…
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Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank you. Médecins Sans FrontièresBy E.S. Haggan
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Policing in Northern Ireland: Another Troubles' Hangover?
34:20
34:20
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34:20Just another impromptu episode in respect of the PSNI Chief Constable's recent despondency at our politician's seeming indifference to the policing budget, and the fact that 'fit for duty' police numbers are dangerously low and overstretched. I also briefly talk about my feelings surrounding the continuing intransigence of the Intelligence Services…
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State-Terrorism and PIRA's 'No Alternative' to violence: Part II: 'The Thing Was Always Planned.'
54:30
54:30
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54:30Moving forward I consider some statements made in the past by PIRA volunteers in respect of 'engineering' the conflict, or, conversely, having the armed struggle forced upon them by the actions of the British. As ever I must admit to straying off on one - or two - tangents, such as a 'murder safari', a term I've coined for, well, it'll become evide…
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Graham Walker - Ties That Bind? Scotland, Northern Ireland, Britishness and Unionism
1:09:34
1:09:34
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1:09:34In this conversation, Gareth and Graeme chat to Prof. Graham Walker who discusses his early influences and interest in Ulster politics, particularly in relation to the Troubles. He reflects on the literature that shaped his understanding of the conflict, emphasising the lack of representation of the Unionist perspective. The discussion also explore…
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The Post-Policing Gaze: Problems of Ego and Reputation
41:36
41:36
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41:36Another impromptu episode, of sorts, before I continue my look at PIRA's 'no alternative' to violence and state-terrorism. Here, I'm momentarily reflecting upon Special Branch handlers, Northern Irish policing and Catholic recruitment as well as the 'post-policing gaze' that preoccupies an awful lot of police officers: past, present and probably fu…
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Shrapnel - Fragments St Patrick's Day Special with Iain Turner of Balaclava Street
44:16
44:16
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44:16In this episode recorded in-person on the Shankill on 15 March 2025 the lads hosted a special Fragments off-shot of the normal Shrapnel pod. They chat to researcher Iain Turner who was in Belfast to deliver a lecture about the complex history of the UVF in East Belfast, exploring the motivations behind joining paramilitary organisations, the contra…
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Germany: Post-Election Analysis from Our Man in Hamburg
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57:24In this special episode of the Shrapnel Podcast, hosts Sam McIlwaine Graeme Hanna engage with Timo, a German political enthusiast, to discuss the current state of German politics in the wake of the recent election, focusing on the rise of the AFD party and its implications for society. They explore the complexities of coalition-building, the influe…
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State-Terrorism and PIRA's 'No Alternative' to violence: Part I: From NICRA to OCGs
37:51
37:51
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37:51The first episode looking at a new series of topics. I've an awful lot to unpack in succeeding episodes, so this is more of an episode in which I will begin to establish some factors preceding the Troubles as well as considering a small part of PIRA's Green Book and which leads me on to present day Northern Ireland's plague of violent organised cri…
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Martin Doyle - Dirty Linen: The Troubles in My Homeplace
1:06:49
1:06:49
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1:06:49In this episode Sam and Gareth chat to Martin Doyle, the books editor of the Irish Times and author of 'Dirty Linen: The Troubles in My Homeplace.' The conversation delves into the personal and communal impacts of the Troubles in Northern Ireland, exploring themes of grief, memory, and the importance of storytelling. Doyle shares his unique polypho…
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Jordan Dunbar - Blood on the Dancefloor: The Murder of Darren Bradshaw and LGBTQIA+ Histories of the Troubles
52:39
52:39
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52:39In this episode Sam and Gareth chat to BBC presenter and documentary maker Jordan Dunbar about his BBC Sounds documentary 'Blood on the Dancefloor' which examined the life and legacy of Darren Bradshaw, a gay RUC officer who was murdered in a Belfast bar in 1997. The discussion explores the complexities of Darren's story, the history of the LGBTQ+ …
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Billy Hutchinson - Loyalist and Socialist?
1:05:26
1:05:26
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1:05:26In this episode Sam and Gareth chat with Billy Hutchinson, former UVF prisoner and former leader of the Progressive Unionist Party. The discussion covers a range of topics including the implications of Brexit on Northern Ireland, the need for unity within unionist parties, the challenges facing unionism today, and the intersection of social issues …
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John Barry - Human Rights Are Not Orange or Green
1:00:41
1:00:41
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1:00:41In this episode of the Gareth and Sam chat to Professor John Barry (Queen's University Belfast) to explore the complexities of loyalism in Northern Ireland. The conversation delves into the definitions of loyalism, the class dynamics within the community, and the cultural cringe experienced by loyalists. Barry emphasises the need for education and …
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Beano Niblock - The Man Who Swallowed A Dictionary: Writing About the Life of David Ervine
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57:58In this episode Sam and Gareth chat to Beano Niblock, an ex-loyalist prisoner, poet, and playwright. They discuss Beano's journey in writing his new play, 'The Man Who Swallowed A Dictionary,' and reflect on his past experiences, including his friendship with late PUP leader David Ervine and the impact of political events on their lives. The conver…
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Danielle Roberts - Feminism & Unionism: A Personal Perspective
42:12
42:12
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42:12In this episode Gareth and Sam pay tribute to the late Baroness May Blood and discuss the importance of women's voices in politics, particularly from the Protestant, Unionist, and Loyalist communities. They are joined by Danielle Roberts, who shares her insights on the barriers women face in political participation, the intersection of feminism and…
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Paul Donnelly - DC Tours: Exploring Belfast's Bloody Past
53:18
53:18
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53:18In this episode Gareth and Sam chat with Paul Donnelly, the lead tour guide at DC Tours, about the origins and evolution of the History of Terror tour in Belfast. Paul shares insights into the challenges faced in conflict tourism, including opposition from local authorities and the media, and discusses the importance of navigating sensitive spaces …
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"If they go to Dublin..." - Shrapnel Live with the Echo Chamber in Ballymun
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41:14
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41:14In this live episode with our friends at the Echo Chamber pod, co-host Sam travelled down to Ballymun in Dublin to engage in conversation with Martin McMahon (co-host of Echo Chamber) about the complexities of loyalism and unionism in Northern Ireland. They explore cultural identities, the impact of the Good Friday Agreement, and the ongoing challe…
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In this episode of the Gareth and Sam discuss the rapidly changing political landscape in Northern Ireland, focusing on the upcoming potential elections and the implications for various political parties. They explore community sentiments, particularly within the loyalist community, and the importance of political representation. The conversation e…
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Lauren Kerr - Breaking Barriers: LGBTQ+ Representation in Unionist Politics
45:56
45:56
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45:56In this episode of the Shrapnel Podcast, Sam chats with Lauren Kerr, a member of the Ulster Unionist Party (in 2022) and the first openly gay candidate for East Belfast. The conversation explores themes of identity, the intersection of unionism and loyalism, LGBTQ+ representation in politics, the challenges faced by women in political spaces, and t…
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Leona O'Neill - Breaking: Trauma in the Newsroom
1:01:55
1:01:55
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1:01:55In this episode Sam and Gareth engage in a profound conversation with journalist Leona O'Neill about her new co-edited book, Breaking Trauma in the Newsroom. The discussion delves into the mental health challenges faced by journalists, particularly those covering traumatic events. Leona shares personal stories and insights from her experiences and …
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Olwen Purdue - Unveiling the Past: The Power of Public History
37:04
37:04
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37:04In this enlightening conversation, Professor Olwen Purdue (Queen's University Belfast) discusses the significance of public history and the importance of amplifying the voices of ordinary people in Northern Ireland. The dialogue explores the complexities of historical narratives, the role of oral history in understanding everyday life, and the chal…
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E.S. Haggan - Stray Bullets: Policing the Troubles and CPTSD
1:05:18
1:05:18
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1:05:18In this episode Gareth and Sam chat to E.S. Haggan (pseudonym), a former RUC officer who shares his experiences during the Troubles in Northern Ireland. Haggan discusses his early career, the complexities of policing in a divided community, and the challenges he faced from both sides of the sectarian divide. He also delves into the mental health st…
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Robert Gibson - Information Retrieval: Bloody Friday and the Struggle for Truth
1:01:54
1:01:54
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1:01:54In this episode Gareth and Sam are joined by Robert Gibson. Robert discuss the tragic events of Bloody Friday, July 21, 1972, which resulted in the death of his father Jackie, a bus driver, and the impact of this day on his family. The conversation delves into Robert's memories of his father, the day of the tragedy, the aftermath of loss, and refle…
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This is the one which started it all! The Shrapnel Podcast aims to explore the complexities of loyalism and unionism in Northern Ireland, providing a platform for voices often unheard in mainstream media. The hosts, Gareth Mulvenna and Sam McIlwaine, discuss their motivations for starting the podcast, the importance of addressing trauma, and the ne…
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Sarah Creighton - Austerity, Housing and Class: A Unionist Perspective
48:50
48:50
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48:50In this episode, Sam and Gareth chat with political commentator Sarah Creighton, discussing the pressing issues surrounding the cost of living crisis in the UK, particularly in Northern Ireland. They explore the impact of austerity measures, the pandemic's exacerbation of housing issues, and the growing desperation among the populace due to rising …
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Robbie Butler - The Northern Ireland Protocol, Unionism and the Conundrum of Loyalist Identity
1:12:00
1:12:00
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1:12:00In this episode Gareth and Sam are joined by Ulster Unionist Party MLA for Lagan Valley, Robbie Butler. The lads delve into the complexities of political sentiment in Northern Ireland, particularly focusing on recent polling data and its implications for public discourse. They discuss the role of social media in amplifying divisive narratives, the …
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Paul Wilson - The Murder of Paddy Wilson and Irene Andrews: the Impact of Violence on Families
1:19:36
1:19:36
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1:19:36In this episode Gareth and Sam are joined by Paul Wilson, the son of Senator Paddy Wilson. Senator Wilson and his friend Irene Andrews were brutally murdered by the loyalist Ulster Freedom Fighters in June 1973. They delve into the impact of sectarian violence, the challenges of political leadership, and the need for reconciliation in a society sti…
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Craig Murray: Living with the Troubles - A Curator's Experience
42:54
42:54
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42:54In this conversation, Gareth Mulvenna and Sam McIlwaine chat to Imperial War Museum curator Craig Murray about the 2023 exhibition Living With the Troubles. They explore the complexities of exhibiting such a sensitive topic, the importance of including diverse voices, and the challenges of educating the English public about Northern Ireland's histo…
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Trailer for State-Terrorism + Did PIRA Really Have No Alternative To Violence?
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8:36
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8:36Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank you. Médecins Sans FrontièresBy E.S. Haggan
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Stakeknife and the Ripple of Terror. Addendum: 'Enjoy the War, the Peace Is Going to be Terrible!'
16:53
16:53
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16:53A brief addition as I wanted to close-up any loose ends before moving on to a new episode in which will be looking at PIRA and their assertion that there was no alternative to violence. It just remains for me to post two links in respect of the killing of Pearce Jordan in 1992 by the SSU. RUC man who shot unarmed PIRA man told doctor job had been "…
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Stakeknife and the Ripple of Terror. Part III: Court Martials and a pause for now.
46:22
46:22
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46:22Pausing my consideration of Stakeknife and asset handling for now. I sure I can pick up this thread again once the Op Kenova report is finally published, but for now I want to concentrate on future episodes examining other topics in the context of the Royal Ulster Constabulary and the Troubles. I close this episode with a few anecdotal reflections …
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Another very short interlude just in respect of those who've been discovering my first couple of episodes and if my novel is still available. The link is here. It's self-published as I wrote it as personal therapy, more than anything else. I've kept the price for the paperback as low as I can (it really just covers Amazon's costs etc.). I've embedd…
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Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank you. Médecins Sans FrontièresBy E.S. Haggan
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Stakeknife and the Ripple of Terror. Part II: An Unreliable Narrator
58:08
58:08
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58:08A lot packed into this episode, partly by design, partly by divergence. Continuing on the theme of assets, handlers, TCG and RUC Special Branch. How were things managed, or mismanaged? Troubles' history remains fertile ground into which black propaganda may be seeded by both state and non-state actors. Each 'side' alluding that they fought a 'just …
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Stakeknife and the Ripple of Terror. Part I: Just War Unjust Peace
48:31
48:31
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48:312025 and many journalists, as well as 'security commentors', circle John Boucher's suite and Sir Iain Livingstone's secretary as they vie for an 'exclusive' and / or interview upon the publication of the full Op Kenova report. Already there's been a gradual flurry of activity in the form of publications touting to have the real story of 'Stakeknife…
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'A sledgehammer used to miss a fly': Counterinsurgency and State Violence Part II
1:03:11
1:03:11
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1:03:11This episode concludes (for the time being anyway!) my look at the RUC and accusations of collusion. However, as I write this more seeds of research into this topic are dropping into my inbox! Nevertheless, this episode shifts from the early 1920s through to the recent Troubles, and via Ireland and Palestine. I sincerely hope you find something of …
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'Better to have one man whom you can hang': Counterinsurgency and State Violence Part I
1:01:49
1:01:49
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1:01:49This episode will, more or less, set up the episode(s) to follow. I'll discuss aspects of how Britain once looked to deal with internal threats and / or insurgency. Beginning with the 19th centaury I'll look at some examples of how Britain sought to deal with riots or unrest within its own borders as well as that of Ireland. I also draw on some of …
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All The Dead Men's Dreams: Sinn Féin, Commemoration and the Complex Reality of Ireland
37:09
37:09
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37:09Another unplanned episode. This time I consider Michelle O'Neill's laying of a wreath at the cenotaph in Belfast on Remembrance Sunday and the reaction to same. I guess the theme of this episode is the complex reality of Ireland and this got me thinking about Francis Ledwidge also, so I've included a very brief musing on the complex (contradictory(…
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The Royal Ulster Constabulary and Collusion: Intelligence Collisions and Contamination
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46:52This episode continues my look at the Royal Ulster Constabulary and allegations of collusion. To be honest, I naively thought that I would, most likely, have provided an overarching look at the subject in a couple of episodes. I was wrong. Given the amount of material I've obtained, together with ex-RUC and military colleagues I've gathered much mo…
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This is just an extremely brief update to let you know what to expect on the next episode. Also, Buzzsprout have put a link on the Stray Bullets webpage which lets you send me feedback about the podcast (they call it 'fan mail', but that's quite subjective I imagine!). Many thanks, Click here if you’d like to send me a comment or question. Thank yo…
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The Royal Ulster Constabulary and Collusion: Agent Handling Part I
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59:56This episode continues my look at allegations of collusion against the Royal Ulster Constabulary. Obviously, there's nothing revelatory within (other than some aspects of agent handling and possible pitfalls of such). There's nothing to breach the Official Secrets Act either. In saying all that I sincerely hope that the biographical book extracts, …
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The Royal Ulster Constabulary and Collusion: Agent Handling Part II
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26:50This is the concluding episode in which I look at issues related by a retired RUC Special Branch officer as quoted from the work cited below, as well as my thoughts on such. Work cited in this episode: Barker, Alan, 'Shadows: Inside Northern Ireland's Special Branch', Mainstream Publishing Company (Edinburgh) Ltd, 2004 Click here if you’d like to s…
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The Royal Ulster Constabulary and Collusion: Impromptu Episode: Intelligence Streams
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28:54This is an interim, or rather impromptu, episode of sorts. In it I consider my working relationship with an Intelligence Cell within the British Army during the very early years of my career, and how it became affected following the brutal murder of Loughlin Maginn in 1989. As such I hope to complete a more comprehensive and concluding episode look…
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