You are all direct reports to us in the pyramid scheme of fails. This week: Brooklyn Beckham is letting a woman tear his family apart, per usu It’s just a little funny how the Pope hasn’t acknowledged President Trump’s peacemaking The one quick way to make slightly less money than your son: a pyramid scheme! Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinz…

Apologies, and love, to our friends who were born in Florida. We hope your midwife was an alligator. This week: Libs freak out over a completely unserious proposal involving Alcatraz Prince Harry’s body language makes it seem like he means what he’s saying Broke dudes are a disease Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or In…

We recorded this on Tuesday so Maura could go on a fail-free vacation. Facts aren’t real anymore anyway. This week: The Fail attacks a woman who is now dead for the crime of having been human Amazon is at war with America, except actually nothing is happening Meghan Markle insults the Royal Family by being happy Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenm…

Stars, stripes, fertility rates, and fails. This week: We need babies! Now! Not in a weird way! Everyone is so mean to JK Rowling, a mean person Las Vegas is scary and the hills have eyes :( Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share your feelings on these daily fails — we kno…

We’re putting the ass back in astronaut, folks. This week: Gayle King and Lauren Sanchez clap back at the people who are making excellent points about how stupid this was Katy Perry’s makeup really stuck in place for 10 whole minutes Aimee Lou Wood cried and won’t tell us why :( Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Insta…

This week: Anderson Cooper got BRUTALLY WOKED Carrie Coon is actively mean to Meghan McCain and also Marvel THERE ARE NO DIRE WOLVES!!!!!!!!!! Bonus story: Maura’s Election Day reporting for Slate is finally out in the world. Give it a listen! Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances,…

LOWER THE COST OF JAM, YOU COWARDS This week: The jam heard ‘round the world sold out immediately. Bad? The little Constitutional loophole that’s not illegal or disingenuous if you believe in yourself Doing murder is really about the friends you make along the way Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinze…

This week: DOGE flops and the Fail admits it Gwyneth Paltrow’s fake beef with Meghan Markle RFK Jr. is taking your Skittles (not) Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share your feelings on these daily fails — we know you have them. Join us on Patreon for articles and photos a…

Fail o’ the Irish? This week: Meghan Markle’s haters point out a very minor detail about very festive waffles The astronauts “stranded” in space are home and not fighting secret health battles Gene Hackman chose Alzheimer’s and you can too Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to …

We love fails and potato skins. Fight us about it. This week: DOGE is not, in fact, giving us thousands of dollars Your dentist knows about your sex life and hates you for it Jackie Kennedy’s bonkers diet is not #goals Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share your feelings o…

Guess you could say Meghan has gotten herself in quite the jam. This week: The cinematic Luigi sex tapes are out there (maybe) A beat-for-beat hypothetical scenario of how a nuclear holocaust would definitely happen With loathe, Meghan Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to shar…

Fail to the king. This week: An absolutely grisly account of Gene Hackman’s home, like 20 minutes after his death was announced Elon Musk is just a little guy who can’t help but impregnate people he meets online Honestly, we pray that Nostradamus was right Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @m…

So if you care to find us… look to the western fail. This week: Vaccine-hesitant distant relatives of J.D. Vance may, tragically, reap what they sow Cynthia Erivo may method-act herself into being a false prophet Meghan Markle is forced to rebrand her jam: jam! Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer a…

Sit down. Be humble. This week: Everyone hated the Halftime Show, except nobody knows why and lots of people actually loved it Christians don’t have to worry about oppression anymore Donald Trump fixed all of culture in 3 weeks! Yay! Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share …

If you don’t move, or acknowledge Kanye, he can’t see you and he’ll go away. This week: The tabloids cannot resist full frontal, even though they seem like they want to The new US Department of Transportation will only fund you if your jurisdiction is breeding, and we are not joking Feminism means that Princess Kate MUST talk about clothes more Fin…

No other reasons, of course. This week: The tragic aircraft collision in D.C. is fodder for conspiracy theorists, who we WILL be elevating Melania proves that Democrat women, and Hillary Clinton, are uggos who can’t wear clothes Taylor Swift issues a warning. Also, hand grenades?? Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Ins…

Failauguration? Inaugurfailtion? This week: Prince Harry settles for… vindication. Melania’s strange, unnerving hat Lauren Sanchez’s inauguration ‘fit was… um… Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share your feelings on these daily fails — we know you have them. Join us on Pat…

Happy New Year from the literal dumpster fire. This week: LA fire chief is fired, but not really, but is about to be, probably Meghan and Harry are terrible people for donating time, food, supplies, and money to LA fire survivors New supplement will eradicate brain rot, doesn’t know what brain rot is Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @…

This holiday season, we're treating you to some very special episodes! Today, it's Kristen's appearance on Fad Camp, all about how the tabloids embrace anti-fatness and perpetuate diet culture. If you like what you hear, be sure to subscribe to Fad Camp here: https://pod.link/1531529240 Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, …

This holiday season, we're treating you to some very special episodes! Today, it's Kristen's appearance on Unladylike, all about how the invention of tabloids was both revolutionary and regressive for women. If you like what you hear, be sure to subscribe to Unladylike here: https://pod.link/1333193523 Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and…

This holiday season, we're treating you to some very special episodes! Today, it's Kristen's appearance on Fixing Famous People, all about how to fix the royal family...because let's face it: they're a mess. If you like what you hear, be sure to subscribe to Fixing Famous People here: https://pod.link/1665730605 Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenm…

And shame on the 14 year olds online. Nobody else. This week: A writer shames everyone calling the UnitedHealthcare shooter hot, while calling him hot Prince Andrew’s friend and trusted colleague is actually quite possibly a Chinese spy Meghan and Harry owe us all an invasion of their children’s privacy. Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer a…

Hot takes nobody asked for about the premiere of a prequel that, also, nobody asked for. This week: Word clouds reveal Americans’ REAL thoughts on Donald Trump, from “neutral” to “ew” to “Donald.” Blue Ivy went to a movie premiere, so let’s objectify her and also make sure we talk about The Allegations Nipple filler is sweeping the nation (it’s not…

Just keep failing. This week: Meghan Markle and Ellen DeGeneres are besties and Meghan also will never go abroad but maybe Harry will Diddy’s Christmas menu is also really depressing (it’s not) Do you hate yourself? Have you considered eating two tablespoons of chia and flax goo before bed about it? Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @m…

Down the street from Kristen’s home, no less! This week: Tucker Carlson says the devil is running the White House but also that war crimes are bad Meghan Markle’s marriage is on the rocks because she’s uplifting women and children Diddy is languishing with a holiday meal potentially rivaling yours Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @mau…

And no, the tabloids don’t care that it’s a funeral. This week: Systemic sexual abuse by Church of England leaders is exactly like being friends with Harry and Meghan Funeral ‘fit checks in the worst and most disrespectful way Commencing the sandwich wars Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @ma…

EVERYTHING IS GREAT RIGHT NOW GUYS This week: The Trump-Musk Simon-Garfunkel continuum America’s Mayor needs your financial support : ( Penis injuries, because why not Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share your feelings on these daily fails — we know you have them. Join u…

Hello from the distant past, where for a moment we know peace. This week: Lorne Michaels, knower of stuff about the FCC A Brazilian psychic says he knows how the election will go and it’s bad Prince William and his daddy are big strong real estate guys!! Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @mau…

U.S. listeners… go vote. There’s no joke. Just do it. This week: Kamala Harris has a family! Dastardly! Will and Kate’s quaint lifestyle ten minutes from the castle their family owns Jesus from Bible did fish stuff! Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to share your feelings on t…

We might just need to rename ourselves the Daily Frail because of all the frail masculinity around here. This week: Men who interrupt women are the real victims, actually Brady Bunch cast member is oppressed because network dislikes her homophobia and friendships with insurrectionists Meghan Markle is a mass shooter??? (no, she’s not) We love What …

We’re in a perpetual state of “disappointed, but not surprised.” This week: A very sad situation punctuated with a very weird TripAdvisor review The city of Coachella stranded Trump supporters in the desert (they didn’t) WOKE SCIENTISTS fear CHILDREN MIGHT LEARN FROM BOOKS Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @…

It’s witchcraft (it’s not). This week: Liz Jones turns on Meghan Markle after a long, long history of not being a fan of her, actually King Charles, a very big boy, eats lunch now Travis Barker’s teen does not know, or care, and honestly? We love self awareness Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer a…

We can’t all have giant blue orbs that shine in the moonlight or whatever. This week: Melania Trump finally explains the “I really don’t care” jacket, and it is not especially satisfying Hashtag where’s Meghan is NOT gonna land Literally a makeup tutorial to steal JD Vance’s look Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Inst…

Yes, we mention the worm. This week: The affair that took media Twitter by storm and made everyone else feel really weird Tiny piece of chocolate > emotional intimacy. Scientifically! The many reasons Huw Edwards might not be truly culpable for the heinous crimes he admitted to Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instag…

You, too, can pass off unhinged and monstrous behavior as a lifestyle. Please don’t, though. This week: Racist conspiracies about Haitian immigrants eating pets are believed, but not by as many people as the Fail thinks Dave Grohl’s infidelity was actually caused by his wife’s tennis coach Diddy’s lawyer insists it’s “just a lifestyle,” and she’s g…

“We open with trees and dappled sunlight. Then fails, close-up in all their magical symmetry.” This week: Kamala Harris was wearing German bluetooth earrings (nah) Taylor Swift’s boyfriend is going to endorse Harris/Walz… oR iS hE The William and Kate video that made everyone go “oh yeah, just like in Gladiator!” Find your hosts on Twitter @kristen…

Today is gonna be the day that they’re gonna fail it back to you. This week: Rumors about a Swift-Kelce breakup are serving AI realness (huh?) The Gallaghers could provide a blueprint for Harry and William to reconcile, or they would if Meghan wasn’t there Nicole Kidman looks so young, but we’re gonna dance around the reason why and just wink knowi…

We’re doing fries and fails. This week: Intrepid journalism on whether Kamala Harris is a frycook fraud goes, of course, nowhere Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce have baby fever (because babies exist) Who’s worse, Prince Andrew or [insert pretty much anyone else] Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer an…

He’s putting the “respect” in “disrespectful”... yeah, we didn’t think this one through. This week: Donald Trump says he’s been working really hard to be respectful of the Obamas Simone Biles should be more respectful of the estranged birth mother who did not raise her A mysterious substance is leading to a wave of dementia (it’s COVID and they’re …

Fails are in the mail, just like alien mummies 🥰 This week: Donald Trump has an unhinged conversation with Elon Musk, much is said that does not need to be MEXICAN CONGRESS ALIENSSSSSSSS Meghan and Harry are hemorrhaging staff (they are not) Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, t…

He’s not. We don’t think that. Please believe us. This week: Doug Emhoff had an affair, kind of, but also more than 10 years ago, and it’s tanking the campaign (it’s not) JD Vance lives out his Entourage fantasies in a super cool way, and the Fail is totally objective about it Travis Kelce is concerned for his girlfriend, but not enough to come sav…

Who’s being weird? Not us. This week: Meghan Markle and Kamala Harris are actually the same person! Cool! Did you know you’re the worst party guest and you’re eating all the canapes? NOBODY IS HAVING CARNAL RELATIONS WITH A COUCH (we think) Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_frances, to…

Let’s be real, it’s the first of many. This week: A young Kamala’s “affair” with a “married man” suggests she’s actually just sexed her way to the top (ugh) Kamala is the descendant of slaves and an Irish slaveowning rapist, which is her fault (and also, why isn’t she acting more Irish) Ella Emhoff hates her stepmother (she does not) and has body h…

Please. We’re begging. Won’t someone help with our coats? This week: It’s time to feel bad for (checks notes) a Hillsong pastor Running misleading, outdated information about the shooter who tried to kill a former president, because why not? Camilla struggles with her coat and watches cows bang. Her husband is also there! Find your hosts on Twitter…

Oh, to be on a patio in Mallorca. This week: Who’s to blame for our current political climate? MICHELLE OBAMA OF COURSE Prince Harry wins an award for serving the veteran community, like a real asshole An insight into the mind of cheaters, courtesy of Ashley Madison Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10mein…

Maura apologizes for the leafblowers who decided to set up shop outside her office window, in the desert, wHERE THERE ARE NO LEAVES TO BLOW This week: Jill Biden is pulling all of the strings of the worst marionette anyone’s ever seen A decisive ruling on what nonbinary and trans athletes should be allowed, and which ones Megan Rapinoe secretly hat…

Meghan is a bad bad mean lady :( This week: When Taylor met with Prince William and his kids, it was actually a jab at Meghan and Harry? Somehow? Meghan’s dad is very sad and confused as to why he’s estranged, does not do introspection about this A sex expert says women should stop having so many FEELINGS and just wait for engagement before having …

Drinking and driving is for losers. Drinking and reading the tabloids, on the other hand, is for winners. This week: A friend of Harry and Meghan posted a picture of Meghan’s jam and dog biscuits at tHE MOST OFFENSIVE TIME Bill Belichick is in loooooove (do not ask any more questions about it) Justin Timberlake’s lawyer says he’s got some stuff to …

He’s a very busy guy with a lot of hard work to do. This week: Taylor Swift could swing the election if she just endorsed Biden (she already has) Princess Catherine sends a typo-ridden letter to the Irish Guards, of which she is somehow the colonel Prince William’s private personal item is not nearly as exciting as we were hoping Find your hosts on…

We’ve got these fails in the bag. This week: Actually, Kate might never come back, but maybe she might Donald Trump’s wife is very brave and beautiful, don’t mention the other stuff Ben Affleck and JLo are, of course, the worst people to ever exist Find your hosts on Twitter @kristenmeinzer and @maurafcurrie, or Instagram @k10meinzer and @maura_fra…