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Into Your Head

Neal O'Carroll

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Neal O’Carroll spins hilarious offbeat comedy monologues fueled by untethered imagination generic energy drinks and a unique twist on Irish wit and dry humour, with absurd analogies, unexpected laughs around every corner. In the distant far future? In a flying space car perhaps? Feed dilapated? Site gone? Everybody dead? Search on Archive dot org for Into Your Head or Neal from Ireland or Neal O’Carroll to find the permanent archives of Into Your Head.
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Neal discusses whether dogs are cultural appropriators, why Dracula is science fiction, building a house inside a barn, theme park castles, pet spiders, TV dramas The Sullivans, House MD and The Good Doctor, foot deodorant, one simple lie that can bring out the best in your doctor. dog mergers, I Shouldn’t Be alive – S04 E07: Alone in the Amazon, I…
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Neal discusses having something in common with Dan Rather, sidewinder glass lengths, the Mandela Effect on Special K (cereal), a memorable brush with law enforcement, one person operated toilets, finding sponsors for death sports, recreational scratching, a special sponge, remembering an old urination segment, the trouble with wheelbarrows, Hamburg…
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Neal discusses demystifying Road Runners and Coyotes, a very bad use of a Maigret paperback, saving a Genesis keyboarist from jury duty, court stenographers versus keyboard players, flying baggage trucks and beyond, commuting on part of Ernest Shackleton’s Polar route, Indian Saints who don’t eat, pressures that come with switchng to cordials, driv…
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Neal adds some colour to the parable of the boy who cried wolf, wonders what it’s like to run a combine harvester, tears the so-called leaping Salmon down a peg, reinvents cut-out activities in children’s comics, highlights one job missing from every school careers day and considers cave based wardrobe design, mouth based cave design, unsatisfying …
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Neal “remembers” a twenty minute nuclear catastrophe on Ireland’s east coast, compares your cat to an anthropomophic Mars rover, invents the virtual hotel room, probably fails to change your mind about backpacks on trams, recounts his unique challenges as a teenage Queen collector and discusses library sandwich inhalation memories, Owls on Napster,…
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Neal discusses the logistiics of handling raw chicken on bathroom visits, an experiment for your next ATM visit, workplace pneumatic tube messaging etiquette, an AI veterinary assistant versus a talking dog, a carpet-based vacation concept, improving your child’s scream accuracy, getting bitten at a sleepover, vinyl records, vinyl floor-covering, a…
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Neal discusses beaches spontaneously turning to concrete, a parent’s head replacement disclosure dilemna, a busman’s holiday in jail, the case for going nowhere slowly, alien visitor respitory concerns, home expansion slot systems, garage modules, attic rooms, defining a shed, beech house owners, parental supervision from a beach-adjacent mountain,…
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Neal EXPOSES how motorists are disappearing in a secret holding pattern, MAKES the case for appetisers for a better drip feed regime, EXPLAINS how things that skip generations are never lost, SHOWS how statues of rubber things can demolish boundaries, DEVELOPS a new folding building bricklaying technique in real time, RECALLS a decade watching a bo…
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Neal offers fresh advice to parents on handling the Boogeyman. explains our primitave plateware to far future listeners, wonders why nobody talks about obelixes, argues against walking to school and discussea the wrong way to arrive at your new school, liquid desserts for visiting dignitaries, growing wheat in city streets, a disappointing school s…
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Neal reveals how ducks prevented him settling in the US, uncovers your treadmill cat’s OCD hell, closes in on the surprising identity of the oligarchs of knitting, offers practical advice on self facing voodoo doll feedback loops for your active retirement, remembers The Onion print edition and discusses the sick, sick world of wireless earphones, …
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In a packed hour, Neal discusses work life balance in the American Wild West, making Spielberg's Duel (1971) on an even lower budget, unexplained generational gaps in the wasp community, a simple device that could inadvertently cause you to speak in tongues, why we celebrate cistern noises, vomiting for the privileged, a one size fits all argument …
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Neal recreates some special moments from the Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert. advises on talking to adults about your dead arm, wonders if you should add blood to your hydration regime, provides an overview of the human-dog-dinosaur societal overlay structure and discusses wardrobe culture, smalltalk in the information age, standout past wardrobes,…
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Neal considers insect consumption norms, identifies a new actor level below extras, exposes a town with a landmark brown stain, confuses the movies Stand by Me and Sleepers, remembers TV’s greatest sketch show: classic Sesame Street, invents a self policing public toilet cleanliness system and discusses introducing city kids to rivers and creeks, m…
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Neal reinvents the ensuite and consequently food ingredients labelling, evaluates modern prodding techniques, changes your mind about ghost trains and Microsoft Windows Paint, evaluates a possible alternative history of Mars, composes a special experiment for tourist excursion helicoptor pilots, tries to recall the name Andy Kauffman and the song I…
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Neal reveals what every flightless bird knows, considers the surprising pros and cons of chopsticks and cutlery, administers a very special listener test, assesses the opportunities for carving pork as a McDonald's customer and discusses demanding more from our fingernails, a trio of Tom Hanks characters, how offices outgrow the alphabet, a land ma…
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In a Christmas Day episode not for younger ears, Neal discusses identifying insects by smell, tag teaming citrus fruits, declaring dead weight at Customs, why ripping out entrails is a non violent act, what you Australians demand of Santa, watching Star Trek: The Next Generation in black and white, margarine related TV repair memories, the trouble …
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Neal proposes a thought exercise for listeners in traffic, identifies a new use for the top of your head, explains how to listen via medical stethescope, diagnoses his audience with a phobia of bodily noises including speach and discusses Nick Cave's Harry Potter exposure, why fire brigades study age-related temperal anomolies, how to make a K Pop …
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Neal sets out his one big problem with both Radiohead and Gilbert O'Sullivan, makes the case for traceable dog food, maps out the next evolutionary step for handwriting and discusses experimental wasp fiction, life in a hundred year old choir, chairs on trains, an innovative way to use the word Christmas, how to tell if Roy Orbison is dead, Jive Bu…
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Neal corrects the listener's delusions about auto pilot, illustrates the differences betwen humanoid cats and Edward Scissorhands and discusses the anatomy of a commercial earworm, understanding you Americans and your Spring Break, how songwriters think, appreciating instant mashed potato, what a thousand cavemen can achieve without typewriters, th…
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Neal reveals what it would take for him to name a fourth cat after a UN Secretary General, recalls the one comic book in every Christian Brothers School library and discusses Neighbourhood Watch mythology, dog anomolies on Bray Head, learning Irish by projection, things legally banned in classrooms, next door's over-reaching attic, the song Frere J…
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Neal discusses encoutering your postman in another neighbourhood, playing Dr Suess, a terrifying futuristic garage, reinventing the painted ostrich egg, Ireland’s sheep filled desert, idenfiifying a mouth's postal address, remembering what you buried in the sand, how deserts evolve into casinos, understanding speakeasy, Stephen King’s car burial ta…
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Neal looks at the presumed defacto diplomatic relationship allowing the moon to slosh our seas around, reveals which of his arms is the least interesting and discusses sailing in boiling water, mouthwash retail licensing, substitute priests, how to say mass, mouthwash as a sleep hygiene product, Richard Simmons RIP, new ways to say no, a military c…
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Neal discusses apple core cowardice, treadmills for swimming, documentaries about little Timmy falling down a well, how and why to properly record your breakfast, corporate espionage podcast snobbery, cultivating a nasal helmet in medieval times, Sunday driving and your metabolism, navigation apps for rabbits, heirlooms versus genes, generational p…
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Neal exposes a surprising truth about smartphone fires, considers issues of scale at a doll's house tea party, advises on conditioning one's fingers not to gesticulate, imagines what it's like to have a co-host, attempts a moritorium on feces talk and discusses a house's undergarment, what age twenty-four is in frozen pea years, handling exotic foo…
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In a sub-standar episode not recommended for newbies, Neal considers how to poach eggs in their shells, the logistics of sieve use for gold hunters and drugs mules, use-by dates on precious metals, podcasts for dogs, other podcasts like this, finding a use for your dog, Dante's magic gondola, a loophole for Marc Maron guests, faking your own death …
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Neal discusses what wiki editors say about you in meetings, sizes and brands of dog, understanding British Bulldog, graceful vacuum handling in a laboratory setting, what tailors do with the pins, the woodchipper in Lidl, beverageware in Terminator 2, how Lidl works, misremembering traditional supermarkets, planning your first Mona Lisa, a non-edit…
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Neal invadvertently creates a bespoke music radio jingle while trying to prove a point, takes a refreshingly positive look at the Dark Ages, proposes an innovative new scam vulnerability discount, tells his future self some home truths and discusses understanding The Beachcombers, belch symmetry, how radio forgot what hello means, Arthur Guinness' …
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Neal uncovers a massive parallel between Bruce Willis' The Sixth Sense character and 1960s Muppets precurser Sam and Friends, proposes an ingenius new type of mnemonics that will change your life and discusses the practicalities of shooting yourself in the foot, being obsessed with Sesame Street, inadequate media explanation of kneecapping, being u…
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Neal discusses Roald Dahl’s shed boundaries, demolishing and redeveloping a mountain, how sculptors manage Phil Lynott and Luke Kelly's hair, designing a bridge over troubled waters, Henson-Disney’s post merger pre death plans, the trouble with the new generation of kittens, the house of detention, when to use Bob Dylan, a feature request for the s…
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Neal delivers an overview of the second hand sock market, considers how a method actor tackles Superman, wonders whether scalding the roof of your mouth would soften your Cs and discusses the presumptiousness of Stan and Ollie (2018), songs from The Producers (1967), how Steve Jobs made phone screems seem real, the trouble with real crime docu-dram…
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Neal considers how a cat learns to smoke in the current regulatory environment, explains your child's hunger for paramilitary-style balaclavas and discusses risky versus risqué, Jesus' disastrous impact on local fishing, changing atitudes to water bombs, edible versus digestible, Inbred fish sandwiches, why lay ministers can't wipe, using Buddah's …
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Neal puts beekeeping under the spotlight, recounts an old cat-related head injury, imagines how normal people say "dog" and discusses bin day in a Stephen King novel, belch fraud, virus creation hobbiests, anti meditation vigiilantism, unsubscribing, unsubs, ONSUG, how Criminal Minds helps podcasts, turning a juggernaut around, listener corresponde…
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Neal discusses what they did to Craig Ferguson, humanoid cats fraternising with regular cats, what to do if your president freezes, elastic band fracture science, a deep dive on overthinking, interpretating foreign languge gestures, how non wilful ignorance works, Irish kids who reference the feds, hotdesking on procedural dramas, why the second ca…
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Neal examines what we know about farm animal cravings, contemplates career progression in a firm of guitarists, reimagines Sinéad O'Connor's SNL pope photo protest, exposes the restaurant toothpick scam and discusses humanely expelling a wasp, why movie trailors shouldn’t be free, recreational self injury (non-psychotic), rib geneology, taking the …
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Neal proposes a twelve step approach to ET and discusses nine to five life for the shipwrecked, anti-social astronauts, saving on invisible ink, how raisons d'etre work, the truth about gout, a new understanding of you Americans, learning from Orson Welles, modesty on public transport, spitting in the theatre of the mind, why x-ray glasses never to…
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Neal discusses black boxes in popular culture, a role for camels in health spas, TV casket reunions, ambidextrous banking, a foot-related tip for smokers, a cat's analysis of the songs of Genesis, wishful thinking about superjet lounges, recording off TV in 2024, songs about administrative work, a cat's take on Peter Gabriel's career phases, tellin…
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Pardon the slightly off audio in places, due to misadventure.Neal exposes the abhorrent life of the cranberry sauce obsessive, remembers a disturbing mass produced heart surgery portrait and discusses whiskey in sit-coms, two very different ways to appreciate crabs, why dogs’ mouths are impractical, Stephen King’s so called stand, a bus tour of non…
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Neal makes an empassioned case for the return of the sitcom theme song, considers assembling a whale stomach survival kit, provides a brief orientation for new listeners, has a go at defining the parameters for a study of the interchangeability of potato and chicken skins, proposes a Russian doll solution to the property crisis and discusses catche…
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Neal looks at how dogs instintively guard agains snout detachment, how the savvy traveller uses their tailwind Time Savings, why your burner phone doesn’t make you a loser. Stephen King’s afterlude process, fun toilet cistern disposal methods, the entrhalling possibilities of 360 degree facial philosophy, a plumbing experiment of which the listener…
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Neal illustrates the Mandela Effect phenomenom using Status Quo’s discography, reevaluates Popeye, changes your mind about socks and discusses what we know about helicoptors, how elevators should work, a clever trick for locating a cordless phone with ham, why holes in food are useful, why the sausage thing last time was a bit much, defining the fa…
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Neal discusses popping your Bs, the trouble with playing a zombie, how to purchase free tap water in pubs, BB Max and other nemeses, apple seed myths, the globalisation of bin day, a tip for listeners who don't enjoy this voice, a card game nation, an entrepreneur's guide to counting money, why Nickelodeon goes over children’s heads, the trouble wi…
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Neal takes an objective look at Hansel and Gretel and discusses the trouble with heroin, basement-attic philosophy, the IRA on Everest, the argument against thought experiments, broken leg mysteries, the rainy day myth, advice for News Junkies, Einstein's dog equation, dog narratives versus dog stories, how a trained actor drinks piss, declaring ga…
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Neal discusses Bivouacs, shoes in radio dramas, traversing North Korea, how to talk to your child about podcasting, the phrase teaching your grandmother how to suck eggs, urinal troughs on trains, inventing the commuter picnic, cartoons about puppets, attitudes to scarecrows, curing the listener's pencil sickness, major life lesson from Man Versus …
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Neal discusses things to consider when falling to Earth, the impenetrable mechanics of swatting a fly, victim-blaming a fly, nondescriptness, a dog's attempts to line it's stomach, why the Littlest Hobo should learn better posture, why dinosaurs could have been pets, assessing the moon's flammability, a fly relates to Billy Joel's No Man's Land, ho…
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Neal discusses explaining Pink Floyd to a cat, understanding the Middle East, how parrots work, cars that are very wide and very short, how to dress a performing seal, Chevies, levees, levies, Daewoo, the building layout in Cheers, imagining what it's like to have undiagnosed haemorrhoids, advice for U.S. homeowners, Led Zeppelin's creative process…
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Neal presents a new original Quentin Tarantino dialogue about a bank heist of a bulding that once housed Robin Island jail (tasteful), and discusses assisting an elephant with self exploration, a bland thing that you're sucking on all day, mapping your face, addressing the far-future listener as ancestor, a non-corporeal Maître D’ versus a cat, Log…
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Neal discusses what happens to your child if they listen to this, what your cat does to feel alive, how to organise a legalised crime purchase regime, reporting future cold cases, Demolition Man (1993), prepping your child for an era of burning and drowning, how to row your dog, Dinasaur versus Alien, an horrific nursery rhyme. forty years of non-v…
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Neal discusses a problem he has in common with Beatle Paul McCartney, a surgeon and a tree surgeon comparing notes, truly hollow fruits, the body as a trickle down economy, doctors berating the comatose, the very worst thing to take on a plane, manicure and footwear logistics for upright cats, cranberry sauce nuts, outsourcing your bedtime thoughts…
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n a podcast laden with twists and nail-biting revelations as we sit in on a jail-hardened dog's parole review, Neal considers what an M and M is, Mother Nature's periodic landscapes, a doctor's views on bi-directional blackboard scraping, the dog bitch to dog Hitler ratio, dog parole board makeup, the French resistance on 'Allo 'Allo (BBC1), what h…
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n the first show of 2024 Neal discusses the term "west brit", Trevelyan, a cat avoiding New Year's beer scams, a dog's dealings with the registrar of deaths and stuff, defining hella dodgy, Hurricane Charlie mountain memories, songs about meatloaf, accepting that toilets trigger thirst, Chas and Dave but not Status Quo, realities of building a road…
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