Have you ever wondered what it might be like to wed an Antiques Freak? Wonder no more, as Ken and Dee take the Marital Rating Scale test developed in the 1930s by George W. Crane (Ph.D., M.D.), cofounder of the Scientific Marriage Foundation. Shout out to QuestionableAdvice on tumblr for this incredible, baffling, and incredibly baffling quiz.…

This time for real and true! From ski lodge to angel fish, they’ve got it all—yes, it’s Blue Mountain Pottery, the mid-century modern ceramics sensation.By Antiques Freaks

We revert to our previous format this week with both Chris and Paris reviewing today's book. The You You Are: A Spiritual Biography of You was published in the last week of January of 2025 by Apple Books and immediately caught our attention since Paris has been obsessed with Severance since it debuted and Chris was recruited into the madness this y…

Waggles has arrived! Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.…

The interesting thing about the forty-first, forty-second, and forty-third chapters of Varney the Vampire is that they don't exist. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unl…

It’s the hottest toy of the 1989 Christmas season and a retro sensation that’s sweeping the nation—the Ultimate Cosmic Sound Machine TM has landed on the podcast, leaving the Antiques Freaks frightened and confused. Where did it come from? What does it want? How did you find this? Who sent you?By Antiques Freaks

This week, Paris turns up the Perturbator records, dons some aviators and a trenchcoat, and heads out into the rainy nights of 1980s Milwaukee to help our Patron Fred. Fred wrote to us saying, “...the sheer notion of a murder mystery with Happy Days characters that is apparently officially sanctioned by whoever owns the rights is enough to give me …

Tap the admiral. Timber-taster. Tom Astoners. Tumble up. All these nautical terms and more defined in this, the twentieth chapter of The Sailor’s Word-Book.By Antiques Freaks

Our friend James Wake joins us for an action-packed episode of mob violence against a vampyre! Check out James's cyberpunk novel THE SAPPHIRE SHADOW, available now wherever fine books are found. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the au…

Chris has to travel to another reality again today - this time, it's a Grecian fantasy world that isn't actually Greek! Speaking of Greece, thank you to The Metal Classicist Dr. Jeremy Swist for pronunciation help on today's episode. Our Patron Austin sent Chris on this voyage through the world of In the Ravenous Dark by A.M. Strickland for his Pat…

The Antiques Freaks have ventured out into the wider world and returned with tales of wonder, including the most ironic possible book for sale, the most charming bookseller disclaimer, the smuggest item listing we’ve ever seen, and why you should always write your shop name on your price tag.By Antiques Freaks

Once upon a time in April of 2020 we read our first Carnacki story - but we did not read it on air. Now the Horse of the Invisible has returned to wreak its revenge, and only Chris and Paris of the Terrible Book Club podcast can rescue the Antiques Freaks from its horrible haunting.By Antiques Freaks

Nearly 5 years ago to the day, we reviewed The Horse of the Invisible with our very best podfriends the Antiques Freaks. Years later, we realized that we had never actually read the story aloud as we had promised you, as we've done with all the other Carnacki stories. Once again, we were wrong - there is yet one more 'nack to Carn, so the Terrible …

Why do most antiquarian and rare booksellers avoid library book sales? And why do we think you should buck the trend and attend anyway? Also, what are the startling similarities between books and human flesh, and how does a hairdryer form the vital link? Tune in for our library book sale haul and find out!…

Our friend Tarra joins us for another thrilling chapter - wherein the duel FINALLY ACTUALLY HAPPENS! Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapter…

The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair that Changed America by Erik Larson has been floating around in the American pop cultural stew for the last 22 years. Paris had always been interested in reading it, so when it happened to be in a pile of books some friends were giving away, she heeded the call of our dark lord and…

The mind behind the tumblr Questionable Advice joins the Antiques Freaks for a rousing discussion on the social history hidden in books and ephemera, and what hilarious and poignant gems we can uncover for our modern age—such as, maybe eating a live spider will cure your flu? (Can’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!) To read more questionable advice, …

Wherein Jack Pringle and Chillingworth meet up with Varney to prepare for the OH GOD WHY IS MARCHDALE HERE!? Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more…

Chris had to go to space again this week. This time, he takes us to a galaxy kinda far away and sort of a while ago (or maybe now? or in the future?) because our Patron Miles requested Black Moon Rising for his Patron's Choice this year. Miles wrote to us saying, "Since I requested two books in a row that were both deeply political, I figured I'd i…

Nothing gold can stay… except, of course, for Little Golden Books. Tune in to learn their origin story as literature for the youthful masses and where the deuce they hide that pesky edition number for The Pokey Little Puppy.By Antiques Freaks

Our dear friend Olivia rejoins us for another thrilling chapter of Varney the Vampire! Wherein Varney attempts to seduce literally any man who shows up on his doorstep. Check out Olivia's spooky novels Lord of Thundertown and Backmask. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian w…

Somehow we ended up with another zombie romance around Valentine’s Day for the second year in a row. Paris chose Rabid Heart for this season after her partner randomly turned to her one day last year and said, “Hey did you realize Jeremy Wagner from Broken Hope is an author?” This piqued her interest since she fondly remembers being at Broken Hope’…

There are several tried-and-true methods. You’re not gonna like any of ‘em.By Antiques Freaks

Slightly to the left of a listener suggestion is an episode no one asked us for but we did it anyway! Come along with us for a wild ride through 20th century ceramics as we chronicle the rise, fall, and subsequent chaos of the Blue Ridge Pottery Company - the Most Dangerous Game of collecting in a haystack made entirely of needles.…

Our Patron Beastwiththeleast sent us Lunar Justice through the mail, presumably straight from his colony on the moon. This may be our favorite way of receiving Patron requests. Join us today for a very 1990s version of the future, including judicial malfeasance, musical patents, jurisdictional insanity, and guillotines - in space! We hope you enjoy…

Sailor’s pleasure. Serving out slops. Shotten herring. Spithead nightingales. All these nautical terms and more defined in this, the nineteenth chapter of The Sailor’s Word Book.By Antiques Freaks

Wherein we are joined by our friend Chris from the Terrible Book Club podcast for Chapter XXXVI — The Consultation. — The Duel and its Results. Check out Chris and Paris's podcast Terrible Book Club wherever you find your favorite podcasts! Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victor…

Paris tackles today's selection, which was suggested by listener Deborah, self-proclaimed Unrepentant Sinner! She wrote in to us last summer saying, "Would you consider an episode on a book popular in another era but one that is actually currently being sold to indoctrinate the home school religious zealots? Elsie Dinsmore was popular after the Civ…

The Antiques Freaks are joined by illustrator Dan Warren to talk about collecting vintage and antique editions of the Oz books by L. Frank Baum, including the incredible attention to design detail evident from the very first edition of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, which film adaptation adheres closest to the original text, the weirdest characters yo…

Please join us for this special episode from our Varney vaults, wherein we endure The Explanation, Marchdale's Advice, The Projected Removal, and the Admiral's Anger. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffe…