E 263: So the Therapist says to her Patient...

ONE DAY CLOSER with Mark & Dave

Today, you’ve entered Dave’s Wisdom Shack. Here, you will hear things that you’ll never hear from your shrink AND you won’t pay a penny for it!

So the Therapist says to her patient …”So what’s it going to be? Fight or Flight?” And the patient answered…”I’m still confused. Do I fight my depression and flee from my anxiety or is it the other way around?”

And there you are. Frozen between apparently, only two decisions, which introduces the last F response to the Fight, Flight or Freeze methodology therapists use to keep client/patients (you) in the loop cycle, stuck in the revolving door…going round and round, until the next visit.

Anxiety or Depression. Which comes first?

That is the question I asked of a very close friend of mine just the other day. We had met for breakfast and it didn’t take long to see that something was deeply troubling her. We’ll call this person Christy. So I asked her, what’s bothering you sister?

She told me she was seeing a therapist, which was a surprise to me, and that she was struggling to find purpose…”I’m just not happy and I don’t know who I am anymore.”

After some further discussion, she advised that the Therapist was helping her assess where she was in the Fight, Flight or Freeze three-way intersection.

For those unfamiliar with this line of reasoning, here’s the simple, layman’s explanation. Say you’re confronted with a life or death situation on a jog through the park, when suddenly you are confronted by a mean (but dumb as a brick) man with a knife, that wants to rob you. I describe this threatening man as “dumb as a brick” because he’s dumb enough to think you might be carrying all your cash in your spandex running attire.

But Christy wasn’t on a run, she wasn’t facing down an attacker…she was seeing a Therapist to help her process why she wasn’t happy and seemed to have lost her identity…or purpose.

So why would the Therapist think that understanding the Freeze, Flight or Fight concept would do Christy any good? Why ask Christy “which one you going to choose?” Maybe the Therapist was trying to highlight that once you chose one…she’ll be able to follow up with a question like…”okay so how would you flee or fight off your depression?”

This might make for a good question. Obviously, “Fighting off” your depression would make more sense than remaining “frozen or paralyzed” in it and I don’t believe it’s possible to “flee or run” from depression or anxiety.

The real question then is WHERE WILL YOU TURN TO FIND WISDOM, INSIGHT, POWER, STRENGTH and the ANSWERS to these FEELINGS and THOUGHTS you are wrestling with? Stay with me..I’ll get there.

Just for the record, I’m not a licensed Shrink, Psychiatrist, or Therapist. I’m just guy in my late 60’s, with gray hair and plenty of life experiences of setbacks, heartaches and failures.

Which simply means I can relate. This is how I got through my storms without a therapist. I read a lot about stuff but most importantly, I read the Bible more in search for answers as to how to “live life,” post discovering salvation.

I focused on actions that brought me closer to Christ way of thinking…because it made sense, brought me peace and strength in the storm so that, I could move past it all…by simply changing my perspective. I asked myself, do I really want to continue to pack all these past burdens, worries and fears with me as I move forward or begin my journey onward with no baggage and a lighter load. I chose the latter.

Google pre-frontal cortex and read up on what it is and how it works.

Suggestions in two articles highlighted several techniques for rewiring your brain for better mental health.

I did like one suggested category called “Shifting Focus and Rewi

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