Episode 6: Drop the Guilt! How to Stop People Pleasing

Lemons and Pineapples

Send us a text

In this episode, I dive deep into the world of people-pleasing, exploring the behaviors, root causes, and emotional toll it takes on our well-being. If you find it hard to say "no," prioritise others' needs over your own, or fear rejection and conflict, this episode is for you.

I share personal experiences, real-life examples and actionable strategies to help you stop people-pleasing and reclaim your boundaries.

Key Takeaways:

Signs You’re a People-Pleaser:

• Difficulty saying "no," even when it’s inconvenient
• Seek external validation through helping others
• Over-apologizing unnecessarily
• Avoiding conflict by agreeing to things you don’t believe in
• Neglecting your own needs to prioritise others'

Root Causes of People-Pleasing:

• Fear of rejection and conflict
• Low self-worth and equating your value with how much you help others
• Childhood conditioning and the need to "stay safe" by being agreeable

Why People-Pleasing is Harmful:

• Leads to burnout, overwhelm, and resentment
• Creates unhealthy relationships where your needs are sidelined
• Keeps you stuck in a cycle of seeking external validation

How to Stop People-Pleasing:

• Start small by practicing saying "no" to minor requests
• Set clear boundaries and stick to them, even if it surprises others
• Develop self-awareness to recognize when you’re acting out of fear or obligation
• Learn to regulate your emotions and calm your nervous system (e.g., through heart-based emotional regulation techniques)
• Shift your mindset: understand that true friends and healthy relationships respect your boundaries

Resources Mentioned:
HeartMath techniques for emotional regulation - I can teach you this, email me for info.
Gabor Mate's book: When the Body Says No.

Learn more about my coaching programs to help you break free from people-pleasing - you can enjoy 50% off a 4 session coaching package this week only - email me for details - [email protected]

Procrastinators, this will change the way you show up for yourself and help you make serious progress in just 7 days.

STOP putting your progress on the back burner

LEARN how to set effective boundaries

MAKE more progress in a week than you have in the last month

Get instant access to STOP Procrastinating in 7 Days here.

__________________________________________________________________________________________

If you know you want more from your life or career but you're totally stuck about where to start, I invite you to book a complimentary strategy call with me here.
We'll uncover what's holding you back from the goals you want to achieve and you'll leave the call with actionable steps to get you moving in the right direction.
For the tea on me, how I work, who I coach and the packages I offer, please visit my website - www.emmaobriencoach.com
You can also connect with me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach where I share an abundance of tools, strategies and brilliant content, you might also see the occasional dog.