In this weeks episode of TOWTW podcast, hosts Chelsea and Ann Marie welcome back guest Luke Shillings. Chelsea and Luke courageously share their contrasting experiences growing up in the shadow of parental infidelity revealing how the same type of family disruption created two very different journeys to healing. This episode explores how childhood …

In this raw episode of The Other Woman & The Wife, Chelsea and Ann Marie explore the painful aftermath of being ghosted by an affair partner after 3.5 years. When someone who shared your deepest secrets suddenly vanishes, what happens to all that unresolved emotion? From processing relationship trauma to sending 500 crickets to at least make a stat…

You know your partner’s betrayal wasn’t your fault. You understand the logic. But still, deep down, you’re stuck. Still needing reassurance. Still bracing for the next emotional shift. Still terrified of being too much, or not enough. Why? Because some of what you’re feeling didn’t start with them. In this episode, Luke explores how emotional survi…

This week on TOWTW Podcast Chelsea and Ann Marie have recurring guest Kristine Haraldsson back on the show to discuss the impact that their women friendships play in their lives, but more specifically how their experience within infidelity was impacted by the female friendships in their lives. Kris Haraldsson, MS is a coach and educator who gained …

When you suspect infidelity but don’t have the proof, it can feel like you’re living in emotional limbo, caught between your gut and your guilt. In this episode, we unpack the messy, painful, and very human experience of wondering whether something’s going on behind your back. You’ll learn how to stop spiralling and start grounding, why your feelin…

What are the women of the TOWTW community doing in Mexico? Nobody asked so let me tell you. They are celebrating women's friendships and the power of community when faced with life's adversities. Please tune in next week for another jam-packed episode of the TOWTW Podcast! Thank you for being here, listeners, and keep an eye out for details on how …

When betrayal shatters your world, knowing where to start can feel overwhelming. In this episode, Luke breaks down a simple yet powerful framework to help you regain clarity, direction, and strength, The ABCs of Infidelity Recovery: Acceptance, Boundaries, Compassion. These three pillars aren’t just concepts. They’re tools. Tools to help you stay g…

You were the one who was lied to. The one who was betrayed. And yet somehow… you’re the one walking on eggshells. Afraid to say too much. Afraid to bring it up again. Afraid of looking paranoid, insecure, or like you're the problem. If you’ve ever told yourself, “I can’t say anything,” this episode is for you. In today’s conversation, Luke explores…

Self-care alert: TOWTW Podcast will be taking an Easter Break this week. With new episodes and guests returning next Sunday! SUBMIT YOUR OWN STORY https://www.theotherwomanandthewife.com/submit ASK US A QUESTION We answer questions from other women and wives on our podcast: Submit yours here HOW WE CAN HELP Join the Other Women Community: Use Code …

There are moments when it all feels like too much, when the pain of betrayal, the weight of healing, or the sheer exhaustion of trying to hold it together leaves you questioning your strength. In those moments, the most important decision you can make is not to fight harder, or fix everything, or know exactly what to do. The most important decision…

In this week’s episode, Chelsea retells a story about a woman experiencing a sexual awakening through an affair, leaving her torn about her marriage's future. Together, with co-host Ann Marie, they unpack the woman's complex dilemma, examining how societal judgment shapes our views on infidelity while advocating for personal autonomy and authentic …

After betrayal, it’s natural to want answers. Will they cheat again? Will we make it through this? Will I ever feel okay again? We fixate on the outcome, hoping that if we could just know where this ends, we’d finally be able to breathe. But in this episode, Luke explores a powerful truth: Clarity doesn’t come from predicting the future, it comes f…

In this week's episode of TOWTW Podcast we are revisiting an episode from our vault. Chelsea shares a story about a woman who finds herself widowed and in an affair with a co-worker. When her affair partner passes away suddenly she finds herself very alone in her grief as nobody knows the full extent of their relationship. SUBMIT YOUR OWN STORY htt…

After betrayal, many people feel like they’re walking around under a spotlight, like everyone is watching, whispering, judging. But here’s the truth: it’s not always their judgement that holds you back, it’s your perception of it. In this episode, Luke unpacks how imagined judgement can shape your behaviour, limit your authenticity, and keep you st…

In this powerful TOWTW episode, Chelsea is joined by returning guest Carolina Vilalva to challenge the notion of staying in unhappy marriages "for the kids." They reveal how children inevitably sense parental tension and Carolina explains why showing children it's acceptable to leave situations that compromise your wellbeing might be more valuable …

We’re wired to crave certainty. Especially after betrayal, when everything familiar suddenly feels fragile, we reach for something solid, answers, guarantees, anything that promises safety. But here’s the truth: You don’t need certainty to heal. You need self-trust. In this episode, we explore how your relationship with uncertainty is the very foun…

In this intimate solo episode of TOWTW Podcast, Chelsea speaks directly from the heart about the business she has created. With characteristic honesty, she shares the pivotal moments that inspired her new courses and the current life experiences deepening her commitment to this work. Join her for this rare, vulnerable conversation as she reveals th…

We all say we don’t want to waste time, yet most of us do, especially after infidelity. We get stuck in waiting: waiting for clarity, waiting for healing, waiting for someone else to change. But here’s the truth: time is the only resource you can’t get back. Imagine if every morning, you were given £1,440 to spend, but by midnight, anything left un…

After infidelity, it’s easy to feel like you have to do something, have to leave, have to stay and fix things, have to forgive to move on. Society, family, and even your own mind push you to believe there’s a “right” decision you must make. But here’s the truth: You don’t have to do anything. You only have to choose. In this episode, we break down …

In this powerful episode of The Other Woman and The Wife, Chelsea sits down with New York Times bestselling author and spiritual thought-leader Rob Bell. The former pastor and creator of the RobCast explores how love extends beyond conventional boundaries—especially after infidelity. Rob offers a compassionate framework for understanding our most c…

After infidelity, it’s almost impossible not to compare yourself to the affair partner. Were they more attractive? More exciting? Did they have something you didn’t? The mind starts ranking you against them, like a game of Top Trumps, where someone’s ‘stats’ must be higher. But here’s the truth: this mindset is a trap. In this episode, join me Luke…

In this follow-up episode, Chelsea and Luke explore the journey beyond infidelity trauma. Building on their previous discussion of grief, we examine how to rebuild trust in others and ourselves after infidelity has entered the chat. Together they share their insights on overcoming self-sabotage, managing vulnerability fears, and rediscovering authe…

Desire can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re caught up in an affair or emotional connection outside your primary relationship. It can seem like the attraction is uncontrollable like you have no say in what you feel. But what if I told you that while desire may not be a choice, what you do with it always is? In this episode, we’re diving dee…

Why does love feel dangerous after betrayal? Part 1 of this special series of The Other Woman & The Wife features Chelsea and Luke Shillings exploring the paradox of craving connection while being terrified of it. Join us next week for Part 2, where they share how pain can be transformed into deeper, more authentic connection. SUBMIT YOUR OWN STORY…

Betrayal isn’t just about broken trust, it’s about identity. For many men, their sense of self is built on strength, control, and loyalty. But when infidelity happens, it doesn’t just hurt, it threatens everything they thought they knew about themselves. In this episode, I explore the ego’s role in betrayal recovery, why the pain runs so deep, and …

Host Chelsea and incoming coach Kris explore why shame might be holding back your healing after infidelity in this episode of The Other Woman & The Wife. Together they unpack the difference between productive guilt and paralyzing shame, showing you how to write a new story - one of self-compassion and growth instead of self-judgment." Kris Haraldss…

Feeling trapped between two impossible choices? Whether it’s staying in a relationship after betrayal or walking away, deciding whether to tell the full truth or keep things buried, or any other major life decision, binary thinking can make it seem like there are only two options, when, in reality, there are more. In this episode, I explore how bla…

Tired of your boundaries turning into group discussions? In this episode of The Other Woman & The Wife, Chelsea and Ann Marie expose the trap of 'collaborative communication' and provide practical tools to transform your requests into powerful statements. Learn why being 'demanding' might be exactly what your relationship needs. Topics: Infidelity …

What if you could curate your thoughts like a bookshop owner curates their shelves? In this episode of After the Affair, I explore the power of intentional thinking using the metaphor of a bookshop. Your thoughts, like books, fill the shelves of your mind, but not all of them deserve to be displayed prominently. Some belong in the archives, while o…

Join host Chelsea and our returning guest Luke Shillings as they explore how gender stereotypes influence both the experience of infidelity and the recovery process. They examine society's expectations of how men and women 'should' process pain, and discuss how breaking free from these stereotypes can lead to more authentic healing. If you’re seeki…

Do you ever feel like the evidence for your worst fears is everywhere? Whether it’s comments on social media or your own inner dialogue, it can feel impossible to escape the idea that you’ll never heal, your relationship is doomed, or you’re simply unworthy of love. But here’s the truth: what you’re experiencing isn’t reality, it’s confirmation bia…

In this illuminating episode, Chelsea sits down with Carolina Vilalva, a licensed clinical therapist joining The Other Woman and The Wife coaching team. They explore the crucial differences between therapy and coaching, helping you understand which path might be right for your healing journey after infidelity. Whether you're considering professiona…

In this episode of After the Affair, we explore a powerful metaphor, the “glass wall.” It’s the invisible barrier that betrayed partners often build after infidelity. From the outside, it looks like openness and connection, but from the inside, it’s a shield, keeping you emotionally safe but painfully disconnected. We’ll unpack how these walls form…

Chelsea and returning guest Luke Shillings bring their personal experiences to challenge common stereotypes about infidelity. As a former other woman and betrayed spouse respectively, they examine which stereotypes rang true, which missed the mark, and whether these labels help or hurt healing. A raw, honest conversation about moving beyond societa…

In this heartfelt episode, we sit down with “Alan” and “Ann” (pseudonyms to protect their privacy) as they candidly share their ongoing journey of healing after infidelity in their 39-year marriage. Their story highlights the complexity of betrayal, the challenges of rebuilding trust, and the resilience required to hold space for one another amidst…

TOW&TW kicks off the year with a journey down memory lane. In this encore episode, we revisit an episodes that deeply resonated with our longtime listeners – and offers our new audience a powerful glimpse into some of our previously aired compelling conversations. From our carefully curated archives, this raw and honest Q&A with Chelsea explores th…

What is it about an affair that feels so intoxicating? Is it the person, the connection, or is it something else entirely, like secrecy? In this episode, let’s dive into the psychology and physiology behind the passion that often accompanies infidelity. Discover how dopamine, adrenaline, and novelty create an addictive emotional cocktail, and why t…

As we step into 2025, let’s take a moment to reflect on the lessons, insights, and transformative conversations that defined 2024. In this special New Year’s episode, we revisit 12 standout episodes of After the Affair, each one a pivotal moment in exploring healing, growth, and the complexities of relationships after betrayal. From redefining fail…

Christmas can be a season filled with joy and connection, but for anyone navigating betrayal, it can also bring sadness, loneliness, and longing for what once was. This episode offers a compassionate space to reflect on the challenges of the holiday season while exploring ways to create moments of peace, hope, and even new traditions. Whether you’r…

This week on The Other Woman & The Wife, Chelsea and Ann Marie are once again joined in the studio by Luke Shillings. Together they retell and explore the emotional story of a woman torn between her role as wife and mother to her family and a rekindled connection with a man from her past. As relationship coaches, they delve into the roots of infide…

The internet can feel like a war zone when you’re looking for answers after betrayal. Whether you’re the betrayed partner or the unfaithful one, scrolling through the comment section can quickly amplify your fears, doubts, and pain. But here’s the truth: those comments don’t define you. They reflect someone else’s pain, biases, and experiences, not…

This week on The Other Woman & The Wife, Chelsea and Ann Marie welcome Julie, the Chief of Knowledge at TOW&TW, to the studio. Julie has been working tirelessly to create an all-inclusive, transformative retreat for women in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. This retreat is designed to foster connection, empowerment, and personal growth in a supportive and …

Religion often has a lot to say about infidelity: forgive, stay, move on. But what if these teachings complicate, rather than heal, the emotional devastation of betrayal? In this episode, Luke explores the intersection of faith and infidelity, unpacking the pressures placed on both the betrayed and the unfaithful partner. We’ll discuss: How religio…

This Week on The Other Woman and The Wife: Ann Marie and Luke Shillings continue unraveling the gripping story of infidelity shared by Tim Teddor, writing under the alias "Mark." In Part 2, we uncover the twists and turns of Mark’s journey in the aftermath of his affair and divorce, exploring how his decisions shaped the years that followed. If you…

Staying for the kids" is a phrase loaded with expectation and sacrifice. But is staying in a relationship after betrayal truly the noble choice? Or could it be teaching your children lessons about love, self-worth, and authenticity that you never intended? In this episode of After the Affair, we explore: The societal mantra of “staying for the kids…

What counts as cheating? For some, it’s clear-cut. For others, it’s a grey area. In this thought-provoking episode, I sit down with porn addiction coach Matt Smith to explore where we draw the line when it comes to pornography and betrayal. We dive into: The blurry boundaries of infidelity and porn consumption. Why shame and secrecy often fuel addi…

This week Chelsea sits down with Carolina Vilalva. Carolina is a certified Executive and Life Coach from Columbia University with over 11 years of experience specializing in life transitions for couples, executives, teenagers, and parents. She holds a B.A. in Clinical Psychology and International Relations from Tufts University and a Master’s in In…

Emotional affairs might not leave physical evidence, but their impact can be just as devastating as physical infidelity. In this episode of After the Affair, we dive deep into the hidden world of emotional affairs, the betrayals that happen through private messages, late-night conversations, and intimate connections that cross the boundaries of com…

In this week's episode Chelsea, Luke, & Ann Marie explore a story submitted to them by a follower. The writer reveals the confusing and emotional complexities of infidelity. Once a harsh critic of affairs, she found herself involved in one after 23 years of a stable but unfulfilling marriage. A connection with a coworker, her direct report, sparked…

In this episode of After the Affair, we’re exploring a question that many men find themselves asking but few know how to answer: What does it mean to be a man today? As gender roles evolve and the traditional definitions of success and purpose shift, men are left to find new ways to build identity, self-worth, and connection. For some, these uncert…