#255: How To Use “Choice Mapping” To Make Choices With Confidence And Clarity w/ Kim DeYoung

Beyond Curious ®

Imagine this:

You’re driving to a high-end coaching workshop—an event you’ve just spent a big chunk of money to attend.

You’re hopeful, nervous, not totally sure if you even should be going…

And then, mid-drive, you get into one final painful conversation with your mother—and decide, in that moment, to end the relationship.

This was a pivotal moment for today’s guest, Kim DeYoung.

Kim showed up to that event tear-streaked, emotionally raw… and more open than she’d ever been.

That one choice—to attend the event and to let go of a meaningful relationship—was the catalyst for everything that followed.

In today’s episode of Beyond Curious, Kim shares how that moment cracked her open… and how it led to her life’s work helping others unpack their choices through something she calls “choice mapping.”

We explore:

• 🔍 The 3 types of maps that help you understand the ripple effects of your past decisions
• 🧭 The 5 questions you can ask to help you make more conscious and intentional choices
• ✍️ How to leverage “Choice Mapping” to re-write your internal stories in a more impactful way

If you’re navigating a big decision, looking for clarity in your next chapter, or simply desire to be more intentional with your choices, this one’s for you.

Show Notes Generated With The Help of AI!

00:00 - Introduction to Beyond Curious and today's guest, Kim DeYoung

Brandon opens the episode with gratitude and excitement, introducing Kim DeYoung—choice coach, facilitator, and author of The Book of Choice. He outlines three key takeaways: understanding the three types of maps (unfolding, people, and exploration), five powerful questions for intentional decision-making, and how mapping choices can help rewrite internal narratives.

00:01:28 - Three essential tools to listen for in today’s episode

Brandon previews what listeners should pay attention to: the unfolding, people, and exploration maps; five key decision-making questions; and how to use mapping to shift internal stories. He teases a live mapping session that takes place during the episode.

00:02:52 - Why choice mapping matters and how it transformed Kim’s life

Kim shares a pivotal moment in 2012 when she made a life-altering decision to end her relationship with her mother. This emotional event led her to a personal breakthrough at a transformational workshop and marked the beginning of her deep dive into understanding choice and its ripple effects.

00:06:50 - The power of listening to your own truth

Brandon reflects on Kim’s vulnerability and how expressing deep truths leads to meaningful connections. Kim shares how a single choice can unfold into life-changing opportunities and how this realization birthed her “choice mapping” process.

00:08:02 - What is choice mapping and how did it begin?

Kim explains how her choice mapping process began with personal reflection and evolved through mapping other people’s stories. Initially using mind-mapping software to track decisions, she developed a visual, flexible, and powerful framework for understanding life’s most important choices.

00:10:23 - Brandon shares a personal reflection about legacy and intergenerational impact

Brandon opens up about his grandfather’s recent passing and how a recorded interview with him highlighted the deep ripple effects of past decisions. He connects this reflection to the power of choice mapping and its potential to affect future generations.

00:12:35 - The three types of choices: simple, momentary, and proactive

Kim outlines the three types of choices we make daily. She emphasizes the “proactive choice” as the one that truly warrants deeper exploration—choices that move your life in a meaningful direction.

00:15:21 - The three types of maps: unfolding, people, and exploration

Kim introduces the three foundational map types in her methodology. She explains how unfolding maps trace the ripple effects of past decisions, people maps show how your network evolved, and exploration maps help dissect current or future decisions in deep, emotional detail.

00:20:43 - Gratitude, clarity, and magic in mapping your life

Brandon shares how mapping inspired immense gratitude and clarity. He highlights the magic of people maps and how honoring connection chains can reveal the impact of introductions. The conversation underscores the importance of connecting your actions to a larger story.

00:24:02 - Going deeper: understanding the “why” behind past choices

Kim discusses how reflecting on past choices—whether proud or painful—can reveal patterns and personal growth. She shares a favorite exercise: identifying empowering traits from past decisions to bring into the present.

00:27:27 - The difference between journaling and mapping

Kim explains how mapping differs from journaling—mapping is more structured, visual, and about distilling core truths, while journaling is more fluid. She emphasizes that mapping can become a living tool to reflect your current truth.

00:29:12 - How to identify a meaningful choice to map

Kim guides listeners on how to begin mapping by creating a clear “I choose to…” statement. She shares the four foundational questions to explore a choice: why it matters, what could hold you back, what becomes possible, and what actions you’ll take.

00:32:21 - The power of softer language: “I choose to explore…”

Brandon and Kim discuss the importance of language in decision-making. Kim explains how using “explore” rather than a firm “choose” can open possibilities and make a big decision feel more accessible and exciting.

00:39:12 - Live exploration map session: Brandon maps “Curiosity Island”

Brandon shares a real-time exploration map for a bold vision: creating a co-owned island by 2027 for his community and other visionary groups. He walks through his motivations, fears, and potential outcomes using Kim’s framework.

00:47:47 - Looking for depth: how to know when a map is “done enough”

Kim shares that the goal of mapping isn’t perfection but resonance. She describes how deeper self-awareness emerges when you explore emotional undercurrents—like money stories or old fears—that might be affecting your choices.

00:54:42 - Why “what” questions are more empowering than “why” questions

Kim explains the critical shift from asking “why” to asking “what” when exploring choices. “What” questions reduce judgment and open curiosity, while “why” questions can trigger guilt or confusion.

00:59:00 - A spoon and a trigger: how small moments can be deeply revealing

Kim shares a personal story about being triggered by a partner’s question about a spoon on the counter. This minor incident led to deep self-reflection, showing how momentary choices can uncover old stories—and opportunities for growth.

01:04:48 - Teaching kids about choices and agency

Kim tells a story about empowering her son to choose between two high schools. She emphasizes the importance of giving children ownership over their decisions and helping them learn how to listen to their own inner voice.

Links & Resources:

• Kim DeYoung's Website – Learn more about Kim, her coaching, and her resources.
• The Book of Choice – Kim’s book about her decision-making framework and mapping process.
• MindNode – Kim’s preferred mind mapping software.
• Miro – Brandon’s choice for digital mind mapping.
• Find Your Four™ Framework – Brandon’s model based on the 80/20 rule discussed in the episode.
• Explore the Visual Map Demo – Watch the video version of Brandon and Kim walking through a real-time exploration map.