Emotional Intelligence: How Do We Develop Empathy and Awareness as an Enneagram 5?

Enneagram Five

We Fives often pride ourselves on intellect, but emotional intelligence is a whole different skill set.

In this episode, Sam E. Greenberg, PhD. joins us to explore what emotional intelligence actually means, why it's challenging for Fives, and how our relationships have pushed us to grow. We share real-life stories about misreading emotions, struggling to stay in our bodies, and the surprising benefits we've discovered from learning to feel more deeply.

We also dig into the shadow side of emotional intelligence, the ways different types approach emotions, and practical advice for Fives who want to build this vital skill.

IN THIS EPISODE:

🔹 Defining Emotional Intelligence – What it really means and why it's not just about understanding feelings intellectually.
🔹 Relationships as Teachers – How close relationships with Fours, Twos, and Sixes have accelerated our emotional growth (sometimes painfully).
🔹 Emotional Blind Spots – Real stories about misreading cues, confusing neutrality with happiness, and accidentally sending the wrong signals.
🔹 Building Emotional Intelligence – Why somatic work, creativity, and tolerating discomfort are critical for Fives—and what’s helped us the most.
🔹 Emotional Manipulation – How emotionally intelligent people can sometimes use their skills for manipulation, and how to spot it.
🔹 Moving from Intellectualizing to Feeling – Why staying in our bodies instead of our heads opens a deeper, richer emotional world.

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🗒️ Full transcript and show notes: enneagramfive.com/47

JOIN THE CONVERSATION:

📢 How has emotional intelligence shown up in your life as a Five? Have you found ways to grow it? Share your stories in the community!

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RECOMMENDED NEXT EPISODE:

➡️ #27: Subtypes

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Chapters

1. Introduction to Emotional Intelligence (00:00:00)

2. Defining Emotional Intelligence (00:00:41)

3. Personal Experiences with Emotional Intelligence (00:02:12)

4. The Role of Emotional Intelligence in Relationships (00:04:26)

5. Challenges and Growth in Emotional Intelligence (00:08:22)

6. Misreading Emotions and Learning from Mistakes (00:16:41)

7. Navigating Social Perceptions (00:24:04)

8. The Anxiety of Uncertainty (00:24:54)

9. Understanding Emotional Intelligence (00:26:24)

10. Empathy and Manipulation (00:26:51)

11. Emotional Intelligence in Practice (00:29:52)

12. The Role of Somatic Therapy (00:32:34)

13. Art and Emotional Expression (00:45:23)

14. Final Thoughts on Emotional Intelligence (00:47:04)