[PODCAST 290]: Routine Reality Check: What You ‘Have’ to Do vs. What You ‘Want’ to Do

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13d ago 16:19

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Today’s podcast is all about routines and segmenting them into our “must-do” and flexible routines. (I sometimes like to call these my “would-be-nice-to-do” routines.)

I have been thinking a lot about this topic of must-do routines vs optional routines because we just recently had our second baby, and our lives are looking very different than they were a couple of weeks ago.

Our time and energy are not able to go to the same things that it went to a couple of weeks ago–and that’s totally understandable. However, being able to segment our routines has allowed us to have so much more patience with ourselves and really focus on the essentials right now.

So whether you’re in a busy season at work, with community obligations, family, friends, navigating health issues, or a combination of all of these categories, this podcast is for you!

I first learned about this concept when my parents told me about a “multiple-choice perfect day.” This is essentially where you write out a list of every flexible routine that you would like to do in a given day, and you select a few things that you can reasonably accomplish or fit into your schedule. No matter what you are able to accomplish from that list, the day can still be “perfect” because you chose for it to be perfect! And you get to be the one who decides whether or not a day went “perfectly.” I included a link to a great podcast they recorded on that topic at the end of this page.

At LearnDoBecome, we encourage everyone to write down a list of their routines, called a Routines List. We recommend starting with the categories: Daily, Weekly, Monthly, Quarterly, and Yearly. You can add additional sections to your list if you have routines that fall in other categories, such as Semiannual.

Then, under each category, create two sections. One for the must-do, essential routines, and another for optional, flexible routines. Here’s an example of mine:

When you have a list of your non-negotiables, it becomes so much easier to see what you have to do every day, week, month, and so on. And then the other routines can be folded in as appropriate when time and energy allow.

When I look at my week, I know that I absolutely need to meal plan, grocery shop, and do the laundry. I also know that I must pay bills each month to keep up with our apartment, electricity, and so on. Those things can’t be missed.

Some of these essential routines have a calendar reminder attached to them so I don’t forget. For example, I have a reminder on the first of the month to pay rent. I make this an “all day” task on my Google Calendar app, and then I check it off that day when I complete the task.

This has been an absolute game changer for me! I am able to be very mindful about what routines end up on my “must-do” list, and then I end up only having 2-4 things that I need to do on any given day. I’m not overloading my list or stressing myself out. I feel so light when I look at and create my daily and weekly lists.

On my “flexible” routines list, I tend to put several cleaning tasks that I obviously want to get to (such as mopping, cleaning the bathrooms, and vacuuming), but I know that our house won’t completely fall apart if I am not able to get to these tasks on a strict, regular schedule.

When I do my Weekly Review each weekend, I take a look at my Routines List and identify any routines on this “flexible” list that might have been forgotten about. If any routine has been forgotten about, I can add it to my calendar as an event or appointment with myself to make sure that it gets done.

I invite you to start creating your Routines List if you haven’t done so already–and split it up into these two categories so that your routines don’t feel overwhelming.

And if creating this type of list feels new or scary, follow the advice of Taryn, one of our LearnDoBecome team members. She recommends following yourself around during the day (and the week) to see what your routines actually are. Start the day as usual and have a paper or digital note handy to record routines that you’re already doing. And as you go through the day, make a note of the routines (the essentials and the optional ones) that you would like to start doing on a more regular basis. This is a great place to start!

We’d love to hear from you in the comments section about how you’ve set up your Routines List. Excited for you!