“Telling Him I Love Him Hurts Him” — Gilgo Killer's Wife, Asa Ellerup’s Most Bizarre Statement Yet

Long Island Serial Killer | The Trial Of Rex Heuermann

“Telling Him I Love Him Hurts Him” — Gilgo Killer's Wife, Asa Ellerup’s Most Bizarre Statement Yet
In this final segment, Tony Brueski and retired FBI Special Agent Robin Dreeke turn their focus toward the most emotionally revealing clips from the Peacock documentary, featuring Asa Ellerup’s reaction to her husband Rex Heuermann’s arrest—and her increasingly surreal statements in the aftermath.
Asa says she doesn’t want to tell Rex she loves him… because it would hurt him. She defends him against allegations with unwavering loyalty, declaring “he’s a family man,” and insists that he never kept anything from her—even while describing rooms in the house she was never allowed to enter.
Robin Dreeke walks us through the psychological mechanisms at play: projection, cognitive dissonance, and denial as a survival strategy. He explains why Asa isn’t just refusing to believe the evidence—she’s incapable of it. To accept it would be to unravel her entire life, her marriage, and the identity she’s built around being the wife of a good man.
Dreeke also analyzes Asa’s body language, defensive responses, and deeply embedded belief system. He argues that Asa’s lack of curiosity—and Rex’s understanding of that trait—created a “perfect storm” for secrecy and long-term concealment. We also explore the disturbing reality that forensic evidence linked hair from Asa and her daughter to some of the victims. How does Asa rationalize this? She doesn’t. She simply... doesn’t ask.
As the segment closes, we also address the broader forensic and behavioral implications: Was this family environment intentionally manipulated? And what mistakes may have occurred because no one was asking the hard questions?
This isn’t just about one woman’s denial—it’s about the terrifying ease with which predators can operate when no one dares to ask why.
Featuring keywords: Asa Ellerup denial, Gilgo Beach murders, Rex Heuermann family, FBI behavioral analysis, secret room, emotional projection, forensic psychology, serial killer spouse, Robin Dreeke, Peacock documentary
#AsaEllerup #RexHeuermann #GilgoBeach #TrueCrimePodcast #RobinDreeke #FBIProfiler #PeacockDocumentary #ForensicPsychology #FamilyDenial #HiddenKillers
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