Episode 681: Why You Feel Guilty for Choosing Yourself (And Why That’s Bullsh*t)

Make Some Noise with Andrea Owen

I had a powerful conversation with a client this morning that led me here: the topic of guilt, and more specifically, what it looks like when guilt keeps us from choosing ourselves.

This client shared that radical self-acceptance, for her, meant removing guilt when I make decisions based on what I want. This is so common. Especially for women. We are deeply conditioned to believe that putting ourselves first is selfish, that our value lies in how much we give, how selfless we are, how much we sacrifice.

So in this episode, I’m breaking down what guilt actually is (and what it isn’t), why we often believe getting rid of it completely is the goal (hint: it’s not), and how we can begin to untangle our conditioning from the truth. In addition, I talk about practicing a little self-awareness when guilt shows up.

What you’ll hear about in this episode:

• Guilt is woven into the tapestry of our social conditioning as girls and women

• The differences between guilt, shame, humiliation, and embarrassment and why that matters

• Guilt is about behavior: about making a mistake and making amends, not about who you are as a person

• Why we often feel guilty for putting ourselves first, even when we’ve made no mistake

This episode featured two reflective questions which I’ll leave here for reference:

• How often have you said no to yourself out of fear of feeling guilty?

• When guilt shows up, ask: Is this truly something I need to make amends for? Or is this just my conditioning?”

Remember, you get to choose what’s true for you, even when guilt tries to argue otherwise.

Resources:

Rythmia Retreat

✨Interested in a future Rythmia Ayahuasca retreat with me? Drop a DM on Instagram @heyandreaowen or email support[at]andreaowen.com with the subject line “AYA Interested” to be added to the interest list!

Devotion: A 6-Month Private Coaching Experience

Make Some Noise

Book recommendations: I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!

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Episode link:

https://andreaowen.com/podcast/681

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