MFP 346: Jake & Heather Khym on Discipleship, Parenting, and Authentic Connection

Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

"Discipleship isn’t about perfection—it’s about intimacy with Jesus. He is drawn to our weakness, not our strength." - Jake Khym

Summary

In this deeply insightful episode, Jake and Heather Khym explore one of the greatest challenges facing Catholics today: true discipleship. They share how the heart of a disciple embraces God as a good Father who desires intimacy over perfection. You'll hear powerful wisdom on parenting—letting go of the lie that we must “save” our children—and embracing our need for God. The Khyms also unpack how to navigate emotional overwhelm by slowing down and seeing ourselves through God’s eyes. Learn practical tools to build empathy and connection in marriage, like listening without judgment, advice, or blame. Finally, discover why we all need spiritual community throughout every stage of life. This episode is packed with grace, truth, and encouragement—don’t miss it!

Key Takeaways

• The most significant challenge among Catholics today is discipleship. The heart of a disciple believes that God is a good Father.

• Jesus is not looking for us to be perfect or do everything right; instead, He desires intimacy with us. He is drawn to our weakness.

• Parents need to be aware of the heresy that we are our children’s saviors. We are not. They need God more than they need us.

• When we are overwhelmed by our emotions, we need first to slow down. Then see ourselves as God sees us.

• In building connection and empathy with our spouses, ask them to share with us their story, and then we need to hear that story without JAB - no judgment, advice, or blame.

• We all tend to be self-reliant, and that is why we need community at every stage, every season in our lives.

Couple Discussion Questions

• On your next date night, take some time to hear the story of your spouse. This may be something that you think about ahead of time and prepare for. Sharing hearts and vulnerability in this way is key to a deeper relationship.

• How can we work at seeing ourselves and each other with the eyes of the Father? How can we see as God sees?