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You’re Trying to Be a Good Mom — So Why Does It Feel So Hard?
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Have you ever found yourself quickly explaining your tone when someone says you sound upset or a bit strict? That knee-jerk reaction to explain or smooth things over—even when you haven’t done anything wrong—is something many of us do without even thinking.
A lot of it comes from the way we were raised. If we were taught that anger was bad, it makes sense that our kid’s anger feels hard to handle. If no one made space for our emotions growing up, then it might sting when our child sets a boundary or pulls away. These reactions aren’t random—they’re linked to the patterns we picked up as kids.
It’s tough to admit, but sometimes the very things our kids do that upset us are the same things we weren’t allowed to express ourselves. If we were told not to be “too much” or “too sensitive,” it can be overwhelming when our child shows up with those exact qualities. Our brain reads it as danger, not because it is, but because it doesn’t match what we were taught to accept.
But there’s another way. Instead of beating ourselves up for getting triggered, we can meet those moments with curiosity and compassion.
That doesn’t mean brushing it off—it means giving ourselves the same understanding we try to give our kids. With that kind of awareness, we’re more likely to respond with calm instead of reacting out of habit.
When we stop tying our worth as moms to how well our kids behave, and instead focus on being grounded and real, everything shifts. The more we accept all the parts of ourselves, even the messy ones, the more freedom our kids have to be fully themselves too.
This is how things start to change—not through perfect parenting, but by getting real about where our reactions come from and choosing to respond differently.
Want to explore how your own story shows up in your parenting? I’d love to dig into this with you.
A UNIQUE APPROACH TO SIGNIFICANTLY REDUCE YELLING.
Are you struggling with yelling at your kids? Do you keep falling back into yelling?
I use a unique approach the addresses the underlying cause of yelling so that you break the yelling habit for good.
https://masteryourownwellbeing.com/tfd
Chapters
1. How Our Past Shapes Our Parenting (00:00:00)
2. Welcome to Motherhood from the Brain (00:01:34)
3. Defending Against Shame (00:05:35)
4. When Our Children Trigger Us (00:10:25)
5. Compassion as the Path Forward (00:17:04)
6. Call to Action and Conclusion (00:24:10)
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