192. How to Listen Without Being Defensive

Relationships Let's Talk About It!

In this episode, I have a conversation with Cathy Courtenay. Cathy is a relational coach and facilitator. She works with both couples and individuals who are striving to find deeper connection and intimacy both with themselves and each other. She helps her clients to see the patterns of relating that are holding them back from what they truly desire. Cathy also facilitates the practice of the Circling Method where she creates a safe space for people where they can stand in their truth and experience what is real for them. Responding to life’s call to find truth, Cathy is committed to a mission of helping uplift humanity and develop profound compassion and empathy in the world.

Most of us are challenged to listen non-defensively when we are triggered or our conversations start to get intense. Listening without getting defensive is a skill that can be learned. First awareness is key, know that ourselves or the other is activated. Self-soothing is another step in the process in order to regulate ourselves so that we can listen with curiosity and the intent to understand, not defend.

“If neither partner is resourced in the moments right after activation, that’s when it gets really tricky."

~Cathy Courtenay

Connect with Cathy Courtenay:

• Cathy Courtenay Website
• Cathy Courtenay on Facebook
• Cathy Courtenay on Instagram

Related Content: Other Podcast Episodes with Cathy

Single Parenting: The Challenges and Rewards

Developing a Healthy Relationship with Yourself

Control Issues

Relationship Sabotage

Couples Communication: Circling Techniques

Difficult Conversations

Let’s Talk About It!

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Theme music “These Streets” provided by Adi the Monk