How a prison massacre carried out under Libya’s long-time dictator, Muammar Gaddafi, set the stage for the Benghazi attack. For a list of books, documentaries and resources we used to research this episode visit: bit.ly/fiascopolitics Subscribe to Pushkin+ to hear the entire season of Fiasco: Benghazi, ad-free, right now. Find Pushkin+ on the Fiasco show page in Apple Podcasts or at Pushkin.fm. Subscribe on Apple: apple.co/pushkin Subscribe on Pushkin: pushkin.fm/plus See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.…
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Is it OK for guys to cry?
Manage episode 190918888 series 1415237
Content provided by TheObviousQuestionPodcast and The Obvious Question Podcast. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by TheObviousQuestionPodcast and The Obvious Question Podcast or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://ppacc.player.fm/legal.
We find, in our culture, that men can freely engage in any emotion, as long as it doesn’t involve crying. Why is this? When did we learn that we have to give up crying as a way we express ourselves? Are we cool with it? Are we missing out on something if we hold it back? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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74 episodes
ShareManage episode 190918888 series 1415237
Content provided by TheObviousQuestionPodcast and The Obvious Question Podcast. All podcast content including episodes, graphics, and podcast descriptions are uploaded and provided directly by TheObviousQuestionPodcast and The Obvious Question Podcast or their podcast platform partner. If you believe someone is using your copyrighted work without your permission, you can follow the process outlined here https://ppacc.player.fm/legal.
We find, in our culture, that men can freely engage in any emotion, as long as it doesn’t involve crying. Why is this? When did we learn that we have to give up crying as a way we express ourselves? Are we cool with it? Are we missing out on something if we hold it back? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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The simplicity of life and how it all starts and ends with one breath.
Is there someone (or something) looking out for us when we need them? I say it in the intro, I don’t believe in guardian angels or old men with white beards in the sky, but when I was really despairing, I asked the air for help, and dammit if it doesn’t seem to me that something answered the call. Was this just coincidence? A story I’m making up? What if I’ve noticed it happen a bunch of times in my life? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
1 What if we treated our heroes and villains the same? 23:12
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedWhat would life look like if we treated the people in our lives who we perceive as bad people - the villains, and those who we place on pedestals (our heroes) the same. What if we were able to even-out our approach - giving the villains the benefit of the doubt and some empathy, and the heroes a sense of appreciation but without fawning or pressure - would the world shift in some way? Would it make a difference? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Humanity, our species, is facing severe threats - climate change and ever intensifying weather, antibiotic resistant diseases, political instability and disconnection, the list goes on and on, and all the while, our own population is expected to grow to 8 billion by 2024. Is there any hope that we’ll be able to align and confront our problems before they overcome us? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
As we grow older, do we remain the same person, or are we somehow someone else? Certainly we change - our looks, opinions, personalities - sometimes these things change drastically...but that doesn’t make us different people? If we're the same, then what is the thing that remains the same? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
1 How much does the media control the outcome? 19:32
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedHow would life be different if we didn’t have news at all? How much of what happens in the world is created or influenced by how events preceding it are reported? To some extent, we know from the media, that mass shooters are encouraged by the coverage of previous mass shooters. What role does the media play in uncovering topics that people need to learn about, and how much do they exploit events, for ratings and advertising, that are better left uncovered? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
1 Must I choose between the present and the future? 20:43
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedThis week, we explore if it is better to live life with a strong aspiration towards the future - trying to build something, achieve something, or leave a lasting legacy, or if it is enough to simply be deeply connected to the present moment. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
We find, in our culture, that men can freely engage in any emotion, as long as it doesn’t involve crying. Why is this? When did we learn that we have to give up crying as a way we express ourselves? Are we cool with it? Are we missing out on something if we hold it back? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
So often on our show, we’re asking questions that are really just circling the one big question that we all have - “What is it all about?”, or “Why am I here?” This week, we get closer to that big question by asking about our purpose - over and above everything else, is there something that we’re meant to do? If so, what is it? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
How do you teach a kid to be OK with who they are - to feel good, to be confident, to do what they want to do? All too often, kids are driven into certain activities, behaviors, or even career paths based on what adults think is best, but may not be what the kid wants. How do you guide a kid into a life that they would say, “I’m happy with this.”? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Somedays, you wake up, take one bleary-eyed look at the day, and say, “No thanks. I’m going back to bed.” Can you do this? What if you can’t - is there something I can do to turn this feeling around? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Why do we, as humans, think we’re so special? It may be easy to look at our place among other species on earth and pat ourselves on the back for being so great, but a simple glance upward at night reminds us how very small we are compared to the vastness and wonder of what is out there. Furthermore, we adapted to our environment in the exact same way as everything else did - we all evolved to fit our environment, so why do we think that places us above everything else? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
This week we talk about death, and specifically, why don’t we talk about it, or why do we put it off until we are at the very end and have no other choice? What keeps us from talking about the one thing that we all share? Surely fear plays a part of it, but wouldn’t it do us some wonderful good to share those fears instead of burying them? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
How do you handle conflict with your neighbors - or anyone who you’re not super close to. After all, you have to live with them - maybe for a long time. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Given the vast differences in the kinds of pitfalls and threats that kids (teens)face today versus even what they were just 10 or 15 years ago, what can we do now to help them to be safe. Even the way kids use social media is much different than the way parents use it (as my cousin told me, “We stopped using Facebook as soon as we realized you guys started), so our toolset for how to help our children navigate life is uncharted and unfamiliar. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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1 At what point is artificial intelligence real? 21:24
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedWhen does artificial intelligence become real? Inspired by a recent news story about an artificially intelligent system that can paint like some of the great masters, at what point does AI cross the threshold to real intelligence - what would define that? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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When you’re gone, when you’ve shuffled off this mortal coil, how do you want to be remembered? What is the legacy that you’d like to leave in the hearts and minds of the people who remain? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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We are all familiar with how life can test us - family members (or ourselves) get really sick or a big change in life that we have to manage, and to get through them, we rely on our support systems, our beliefs, our spirituality, etc, but sometimes, life comes out of nowhere and forces you to act “in the moment” - there is no time to plan or examine options. It is like a ‘pop quiz’ - you don’t know it’s coming, you have to act, and depending on what you do, you can fail it. Is there a way to prepare for these? Is there something we can rely on so that we pass with flying colors? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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How much stuff do we need? What things matter the most to us, and at what point do they become a burden? It feels timely to ask ourselves about the things we own, because we all know that we’re going to have to give it up someday, so are we OK leaving our friends and family members to deal with it? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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Many of us grow up with the notion that you can accomplish anything if you put your mind to it, that, through perseverance, grit, and hard work, you can achieve whatever you want. In parallel, many of us learned (and feel) that life has a flow to it all of its own, and your ability to align yourself with this flow can directly relate to how happy and at peace you are, and we wonder this week, are these two at odds with each other? Can you do both - can you achieve objectives and be one the current of life? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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How well do you really know someone? We think we really know the people in our lives, but sometimes, someone will do something that turns that on its ear and makes us wonder if we really ever knew that person at all. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
What can we rely on as true? Are there facts that we can use - without leaning on a belief, that help us to live our lives? Conversely, do we find ourselves in a position of ever-present uncertainty about the world, the universe (and our place in it), and how does this impact the way we function and relate to others? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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When do we make the transition from the carefree life of a kid to the responsible life of an adult? We all know it happens at some point, but when? Does something happen that forces us into it? Do we have to do it? At some point, do we (or will we) get to be carefree again? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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1 Do I have to choose between belief and non-belief? 21:28
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedIn the great debate between "There's a God" and "Nope...no God", what if I don't like either choice? Inspired by some lectures by the late great philosopher, Alan Watts, this week we talk about the two predominant models of the universe: one where we/it are the product of some type of creator or intelligence, and one where we/it are part of a natural scientific mechanical process with our question being, do I have to choose between the two? Is there another way to think of it? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
What is the magic that connects you with the people you're closest with? Think of the people closest to you in your life: your best friends, your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend, good buddies... what connects you with them? Is it because you have something in common? If so, then what does that say about the whole “opposites attract” thing? It seems that neither idea captures it completely, so there must be something else - some grand unified theory of what connects us with the people we love to be with - what is it? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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This week, we wonder about worry. To some degree, everybody worries. Some people worry constantly and need medication to help them find some peace, but is there some amount that is useful? Should we try to rid ourselves of worry altogether? Does worry help us to accomplish things in our lives, or does it just get in the way? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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We’re supposed to teach our children well, but teach them what? What one thing do they need to know, above all else? What do I need to know? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Joe asks Bob and I this week, “what does it mean to be a good dad?”, and the question is not academic, the question is really, ‘Am I a good dad?” The three of us all have children - I have a son, Bob has two sons and two daughters, and Joe has two sons and a one daughter, and we’re wondering, how do we know if we’re making the cut for what is, inarguably, the most important job we have. It is my opinion, and I’m sure Joe and Bob agree, that the moment we had children, everything else dropped away - everything we previously thought was so critical and important is now fighting for a very distant second place - so how do we know if we’re doing by them? I hope you like our conversation - I can’t think of any other that touched such a sensitive nerve so quickly. We’d love to hear your thoughts on it, whether you’re a mom or a dad or not - maybe you can help us all to be better. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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1 Would you want to know your expiration date? 21:40
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedDo you want to know when (and how) you'll pass from this world? Death fascinates us, scares us, and depending on what you believe, could be exciting - maybe it is big adventure. Maybe it is absolutely nothing; a nothing that we can’t even imagine (like trying to draw up a memory from before you were born). We wonder why we don’t talk about it. After all...it’s coming. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Why do we complain? Does it do us any good? Joining us this week we’re very happy to have with us a special guest host. Dr. Tanie Miller Kabala. In addition to her private clinical psychology practice at the West Chester Wellness Center in West Chester, PA, Tanie is the author of the very successful and well-regarded Weight Loss Surgery Coping Companion. Additionally, Tanie recently released an album of meditations and relaxations entitled, Rest and Restore, which is available on iTunes, Amazon, the App Store, and Google Play. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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What is life all about? I think we could say that life is about being happy. Well, one way to be happy is to do things that you enjoy, right? So this said, if given the time and money, would a life of pleasure for the sake of it make you happy? Or would that get tiresome? Is there a better way that would ultimately lead to a fuller and richer existence? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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Imagine a situation where someone you're close to is getting a raw deal. How do you know when you should step in to help, or when to let them fight their own battle? If you step in, are you sure you won't cause more harm than good? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Picture a friend or a family member who is participating in an activity (a sporting event or maybe they’re in a band) and you want to support them. What does that mean? What if you think they’re terrible at that sport or that their music is horrendous, do you still support them? Is your support somehow different now? Flipped around, when you do something, and you’re looking for the support of your friends and family, what are you looking for? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
Of all of the qualities that humans possess, being able to trust someone else may be at the very top. It is the cornerstone of many of our relationships and the reason why we’re able to function together as families, friends, coworkers, and total strangers - we, generally speaking, trust that total strangers won’t harm us, as they can trust us to do the same. So what is trust and how do we build it? What if it is taken from us, can we get it back? What can I do, personally, to make myself trustworthy to others? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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If you noticed something bad or offensive about a stranger - could you tell them about it in an effective way... in a way that would be helpful and well-received? There are loads of books about giving feedback to people who we’re close to, whether they’re family members, friends, or coworkers, but what about people we don’t know? Is there anyway to do this without sounding like a total jerk? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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1 Are technological conveniences taking over my life? 19:41
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Play Later Play Later Lists Like LikedFor many of us, we’re fortunate to live in a time of unprecedented convenience where cars park themselves, home utilities can be managed through your phone, and turning out the lights can be accomplished by simply uttering aloud, “OK Google, ask Alexa to tell Siri to turn the lights off.” But what price do we pay for this convenience? Are we losing something important when we give these seemingly simple or mundane human activities over to technological solutions? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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Do the clothes make the man, or in this case, ‘the Bob.’ This episode starts out with Bob asking a very different question, being “why do we make fun of people”, but what we really find ourselves talking about is clothes - what they say about ourselves and what they make us say about others. We try to figure out how what we wear impacts how we feel, how we treat other people, how we want to feel and be treated, and in the end, are we OK with it all. Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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Most of us lead incredibly hectic and busy lives, but are we spending our precious and finite time wisely? Are we spending enough time on things that we would say are important and truly worthwhile? Certainly, there are things that we have to do - commitments that we can’t or shouldn’t get around, but do we do a good job of balancing these with things that make our lives meaningful? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here, iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.…
When a cashier at a store gives you back a little too much change, do you always give it back? This week, we try to understand for ourselves what motivates petty theft. As you’ll hear, some jerks stole from Joe (he tells the story), and we try to understand what could be going on in the head of someone who is taking from someone else (when it isn’t a life or death situation). We usually try to stay away from questions that have been well-researched and already have answers, but with this one we’re trying to come at it from a more personal perspective than an academic or psychological one - what does it mean to us for someone to steal like this and how does it shape our thinking about people who do it? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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“Let’s just agree to disagree” is an expression that is commonly heard, but is this ever even possible? Lately, many people here in the US are noticeably divided on a number of very important issues that no one seems to be able to budge on. This said, how can we begin to communicate effectively and find common ground, recognizing that our opinions are coming from very different perspectives? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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Are the demands of organized sports today are ruining kids’ childhoods? Far from the informal pick-up games that we were used to as kids, today’s sports are taking up many hours in a kid’s week and can seem to be anything but “just for fun”. Are we wrong to make them do it? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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Nobody feels great about being talked about when they're not present (especially when it isn’t good), but we all seem to do it anyway. What keeps us from being direct with the people around us? We see this all the time at work with meetings that rarely take place IN the actual meeting (the real conversation always seems to happen in the halls, cubes, and offices outside the meeting). So what is going on here, and what can we do to make things better? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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This week we try to answer a question from one of our listeners, Joel, who asks, “What if a person makes what is perceived to be a bad decision but it works out. Does that make it a good decision in the end?” He gives the example of a hockey player who makes a super risky pass that almost results in a turnover, but it winds up going to the intended recipient and the team scores…does the coach rip him a new one for the risky pass or is it OK because they scored? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
There is a lot of losing in life - everything from business deals to relationships to elections, but to many people (especially those who live in Bob’s neck of the woods, Atlanta, GA) the Falcons’ loss to the New England Patriots was truly devastating. Why is this? Why do we seem to need and accept the emotional toll that comes with losing something that we’re not even playing? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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What do you stand for in your day-to-day life. What principal do you put yourself at risk for? What stance do you take that could cost you your job? What position do you take that could cost you your life? We recorded this in October of 2016, when San Francisco 49ers QB Colin Kaepernick chose to sit during the playing of the National Anthem at football games in order to protest the treatment of black people and people of color in the United States. This question, though, is even more alive as very recently millions of people protested the inauguration of Donald Trump, and continue to participate in protests on a myriad of issues. As you’ll hear in our discussion, we try to draw a distinct (and tough) line between principals that we quietly and safely support to like-minded individuals, and those that might place us at risk - the ones where we’re really challenging ourselves...what do we stand for? Check out the conversation and then let us know what you think at obviousquestion.wordpress.com or on our FaceBook page @obviousquestion Subscribe to The Obvious Question podcast here or wherever you get your podcasts.…
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