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25-142 Fighting Fair: Healthy Conflict Resolution
Manage episode 484142735 series 3314456
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Conflict in marriage is like a fire: handled with care, it brings warmth. Mishandled? You burn the whole house down. Every married couple fights—yes, even the ones on Instagram who do synchronized Bible study videos in matching flannel.
The issue isn’t if you fight—it’s how you fight.
Our springboard for today’s discussion is:"Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger." — James 1:19
Let’s talk about what fighting fair actually looks like.
First, listen before you launch. Don’t load up your rebuttal while your spouse is still talking. That’s not a conversation—that’s just verbal dodgeball.
Second, tone matters. You can say, “I didn’t mean that,” but once it’s out there—your spouse heard it in your tone.
Third, no below-the-belt shots. No bringing up 2014. No using words like “always” and “never.” (Unless you're saying, “I’ll always love you,” or “I’ll never give up on us.” Those are allowed.)
Conflict becomes holy when you remember you’re not enemies—you’re allies.
And hey, sometimes humor helps. If things get too heated, take a break. Walk around the block. Hug awkwardly in silence until you both crack up. Just remember—the goal is connection, not conquest.
Fighting fair means inviting the Holy Spirit into the heat. It means disagreeing without dishonoring. It means saying, “Let’s work through this—together—with Jesus in the middle.”
Question of the Day:How can you handle disagreements with more grace and less damage?
Mini Call to Action:Next time you feel tension rising, stop and pray—even if it’s just, “Lord, don’t let me say something dumb.” Then talk… slowly.
Let’s Pray:Father, teach us to fight for each other, not against each other. Help us be slow to speak, quick to listen, and filled with Your peace in every disagreement. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Let’s Get To Work!Because a healthy marriage doesn’t avoid fights—it redeems them.
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