"But They're Your Parent": Toxic Things People Say to Cycle Breakers

You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic Parents

Surviving (not thriving) Mother's Day weekend is what we're celebrating this week. Breaking cycles isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Your commitment to healing, despite few healthy examples, is powerful. Be gentle with yourself; your journey of growth deserves compassion, not criticism.

Next we’re calling out the toxic phrases that gaslight, invalidate, and harm adult children of parents with BPD or NPD. You've probably heard, "But they're your parents, you should forgive them," or "When they die, you'll miss them." Unsurprisingly, I share how much I hate these comments and try to give you a chuckle along the way.

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Torie Wiksell is a therapist and coach who specializes in working with the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. Torie brings a unique perspective having spent years working with clients with personality disorders and growing up with a mother she suspects had NPD with BPD traits. Torie provides online therapy to clients located in WA, OR, and CA, and online coaching internationally.
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you are in mental health crisis, please contact the Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988.
You're Not Crazy is a podcast owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

Chapters

1. Welcome and Mother's Day reflections (00:00:00)

2. Updates on Boundaries Workshop and Membership (00:02:19)

3. Toxic phrases people say to cycle breakers (00:05:40)

4. Breaking cycles is like leaving a cult (00:12:56)

5. Self-compassion for imperfect healing journeys (00:16:21)

6. Episode wrap-up and gratitude (00:18:09)