Episode #207 The Drama Triangle

Mindset Matters

#Business #Don't Get #Riley Jensen

47:59

Ep. 42 - RevPar Problems, Real Talk: When Memes Meet Metrics with Calvin Tilokee How do revenue managers really think? What makes hotel rates spike during Taylor Swift concerts—or Bigfoot conventions? And why do memes about ADR hit harder than your star report? In this episode of Tickets to Travel: The Business of Travel Experiences , we sit down with Calvin Tilokee of RevPAR Media, the sharp mind behind the viral @RevPARProblems Instagram account. Calvin pulls back the curtain on hotel pricing strategy, compression events, influencer marketing, and what event producers often get wrong when pitching to hotels. Whether you’re trying to block rooms for a major festival, fill your hotel over a soft week, or just want to understand the secret language of revenue managers, this episode is packed with insight and humor. This episode is a must-listen for hotel sales and revenue teams, meeting and event planners, festival promoters, and hospitality marketers. Follow @RevPARProblems on Instagram for daily hotel truths and satire. And subscribe now to hear why Calvin says: “We don’t need your group when we’re already full. Call us the week after Christmas.” For more insider conversations at the intersection of travel, ticketing, and live experiences, follow us on all socials @Tix2TravelPod and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. If you haven’t listened yet, head to www.tttpod.com to catch up on past episodes.…

5 years ago 6:25

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Are you getting sucked into the drama triangle? Do you have friends that play the victim, the rescuer, or the prosecutor on a constant basis? Draw clear and strong boundaries. When needed, let your dramatic friends go. It is important to clear the noise when you are trying to perform at the highest level possible.

253 episodes

Episode #207 The Drama Triangle

Mindset Matters

11 subscribers

published 5 years ago

MP3•Episode home

253 episodes

#Business #Don't Get #Riley Jensen

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Mindset Matters

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Episode #254 Commitment is more than a Choice 5:02

18 hours ago5:02

5:02

“Commitment Is More Than a Choice” Welcome back everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about how commitment is more than a choice. Have you ever wondered why some people seem to rise to the top, while others—equally talented—stay stuck in place? The answer often isn’t talent or luck. To me, It’s commitment. Let me tell you a story I often share with my athletes and business clients. There was once a young man with a dream job—he got his foot in the door at a prestigious company. For five years, he worked harder than anyone: first one in, last one out, always making sure the boss noticed. He was motivated. He was determined. And when a supervisor position finally opened up—he applied with confidence. But he didn’t get it. The job went to someone who had only been there six months. Fuming, he stormed into his boss’s office demanding to know why. The boss paused, then asked him to do something simple: go buy some oranges for his wife. Frustrated but obedient, the man came back with a bag of oranges—any kind, didn’t matter to him. Task done. Then the boss gave the same task to the man who got the promotion. That employee made a call to the boss’s wife to ask what the oranges were for. Found out she was making juice. Asked the grocer which oranges were best for juicing—Valencia, by the way—negotiated a bulk discount, and even dropped the oranges off at her house on the way back. See the difference? Both followed instructions. Only one committed to the task. The truth is: motivation gets you started, but commitment gets you results. And commitment isn’t just about making a choice—it’s about owning that choice. 👉 Think about your own life for a moment: Are you just going through the motions? Are you waiting to “feel motivated” before you take action? Or are you willing to choose your path—and then commit to it fully? This is where Autonomy, one of the three pillars of Self-Determination Theory, comes into play. Autonomy is what I call the “I Choose” factor. And the more you actively choose your path, the more likely you are to stay the course when it gets hard. I often say: ✅ Choose your love—and then love your choice. It’s easy to choose something when it’s exciting. But real commitment is shown when it’s no longer new or easy. Here’s how to build deeper commitment in your life starting today: Stop overthinking. Over-analysis kills action. Get clear, get moving. Know yourself. Strengths, weaknesses—own them all. Growth starts with honesty. Write it down. A goal unwritten is just a wish. Tell someone you trust. Accountability fuels follow-through. Care—genuinely. Care about your work. Care about others. Care about your impact. And here’s the key: Be authentic. When you make choices that align with who you really are—your values, your passion, your intuition—you tap into a powerful fuel source. You don’t need motivation when your choices are authentic. You need commitment. I think of my grandfather, Clark Owen Thompson—a man who wore many hats, from grocery store owner to insurance salesman. He wasn’t the wealthiest man. But he was authentic. He chose his path, he loved his choices, and he left a legacy of kindness, humor, and hard work. Ten of his great-grandchildren now carry his name. That’s impact. That’s a life well-lived. So today, I’m challenging you: ✅ Challenge 1: Pick two things you want to get done this week. Give yourself a reasonable deadline. Then do them. Small wins build momentum. ✅ Challenge 2: Start aligning your words with your actions. If you say you’re going to do something—show up and do it, with excellence. Don’t just grab any oranges. Find the best ones. Remember: Motivation comes and goes. Commitment is a choice you make—and keep—every single day.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #253 Autonomy 4:06

5 days ago4:06

4:06

5-Minute Podcast Script: “Autonomy: The Power of ‘I Choose’” Welcome back everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about Autonomy and the power of the phrase “I choose” Let me ask you something like I always do. Do you love what you do? Like, deep down… do you still love it? One of my favorite sports movies of all time is The Rookie, starring Dennis Quaid. If you’ve seen it, you know it’s more than just a baseball story—it's a story about rediscovering purpose. In the film, Jim Morris, a high school baseball coach who long ago gave up on his dream of the majors, gets pushed by his students to try out one last time. Along the way, he wrestles with doubt, fear, and the question that many of us face at some point: Is this still worth it? And in a pivotal moment, his wife simply asks him: “Do you still love it?” That question changes everything for him. So here’s my question for you: 👉 Do you love it? 👉 Even if you’re not winning every time, do you still love the process, the game, the journey? Because you won’t always be at 100%. You won’t always feel like you’re crushing it. But when you have Autonomy—when you choose your path—something powerful happens: you start to show up differently. 💡 In sport psychology, we call this Self-Determination Theory. It’s built on three simple but profound ideas: Autonomy – I choose Competence – I can Relatedness – I belong Today, I want to focus on Autonomy: the power of “I choose.” The truth is, when you’re doing something because someone else told you to—whether it’s your parents, your boss, or society—you’re less likely to stick with it when adversity hits. But when you’ve made the decision for yourself—when you choose it—you’ll fight for it longer, you’ll have more grit, and you’ll stay more resilient. This is true in sports. It’s true in business. It’s true in relationships. Here’s a quick exercise for you right now: 📌 Think of something in your life that’s weighing you down. Maybe it’s a job you don’t love, a role you didn’t really choose, or a goal that doesn’t feel like yours. Now ask yourself: ✅ Did I choose this? ✅ Do I love it? ✅ Is there a small decision I can make today to bring more choice and control back into my life? Sometimes, it’s the tiniest choices that shift everything. In one study, nursing home patients were simply given the freedom to adjust their own room temperature, pick their meals, or move furniture. The result? They became happier, more active, and more alive. You don’t need to quit your job or move across the country today. But you can: ✔ Choose how you respond. ✔ Choose one activity that fills your cup. ✔ Choose to say “no” to one thing that drains you. And here’s the other truth: Stop chasing motivation. Start building commitment. Motivation comes and goes. Commitment? That’s what makes greatness. It’s not about waiting until you feel like it. It’s about showing up because you chose this. So today, ask yourself: 👉 Where in my life can I say, “I choose”? 👉 Where can I move from should to want? And if you’re stuck—start small: ✅ Write down one thing you’re grateful for. ✅ Take one small action that’s truly yours. ✅ Say “no” to something that doesn’t serve you. That’s how you start living your “I choose” life. 👉 I’d love to hear your thoughts—DM me on Instagram @rileysjensen or tag me with your biggest takeaway from today’s episode.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #252 Dreams vs Plans 3:32

6 days ago3:32

3:32

Dreams Don’t Produce (But Plans Do)" Welcome back everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about turning dreams into plans. Let me ask you a simple question: Are you dreaming… or are you planning? Listen, having dreams is awesome. I’m all for dreaming big. I’m a dreamer—I’ve always been one. But here’s the truth most people won’t tell you: 👉 Dreams don’t produce. Plans produce. Dreams are free. They live in your mind. They feel good. But they don’t move the needle. What moves the needle? A plan. Let’s break it down: Dreams are unlimited. They’re vague. They can last forever in your mind. But a plan? A plan has a deadline. A plan demands effort. It costs you time, energy, discipline… sometimes even money. Dreams can motivate you… but a plan will actually transform your life. Here’s a question for you right now—wherever you’re listening: Do you have a real plan? Or are you just hoping? I see it all the time with athletes, entrepreneurs, and high performers. We say things like: “I dream of being mentally tough.” “I dream of being the starting quarterback.” “I dream of losing weight or getting that promotion.” But when I ask, “What’s the daily plan?” …crickets. No judgment. Just awareness. Because here’s the deal—your dreams are valid. They matter. But without a plan, they’re just decorations for your imagination. 🔥 Let’s Get Practical. Here’s Your Challenge Today: #1 – The Gratitude Reset. Tonight, before you go to bed, write down three things you’re grateful for. Seriously. Grab a notebook, or the Notes app on your phone. It could be simple: Health My family The opportunity to compete Or go deeper if you want. Gratitude isn’t fluffy—it’s tactical. Research shows it resets your brain, improves sleep, boosts performance, and literally makes you more mentally tough. #2 – Write a Gratitude Letter. Pick someone who’s made a difference in your life—a coach, a teammate, a parent, a mentor. Send them a text, a DM, or—if you’re old school—write a handwritten note. Something like: “Hey, I just wanted to thank you. You’ve made an impact on my life, and I appreciate you.” Two things happen when you do this: 1️⃣ You make their day. 2️⃣ You reset your own mindset toward growth instead of comparison. 🎯 Final thought: It’s easy to get caught in “dream mode.” But what wins? Execution. Dreams inspire. Plans transform. So today, audit your life: What’s the dream? Where’s the plan? And what are three things you’re grateful for today that prove you’re already making progress? This is Pure Unadulterated Guts. Let’s go to work.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #251 Tools to Crush Unrealistic Expectations 4:37

12 days ago4:37

4:37

🎙️ Title: Tools to Crush Unrealistic Expectations Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about tools that can crush unrealistic expectations. Question for you... When was the last time you felt like you were behind in life? Behind in your career, behind in your sport, behind in… everything? Yeah… me too. Way too often. We chatted in a past episode about the one toxic little word: “should.” I should be further along. I should have figured this out by now. I should be perfect. It’s a dangerous word. However, his episode is all about crushing those unrealistic expectations—and replacing them with tools that actually move you forward. Tool #1: Gratitude—The Ultimate Reset Button I work with a high-level golfer named Taitum Beck. She uses a tool that’s ridiculously simple but insanely powerful. At the end of each round, no matter how she plays, she writes: ✍️ 3 things she’s grateful for ✍️ 1 thing she learned That’s it. Simple. But you wouldn’t believe how it transforms her mindset. When you're grateful, it’s nearly impossible to beat yourself up the same way. Gratitude grounds you in reality, not in some imaginary, perfect version of yourself. And it’s not just a warm, fuzzy idea. ✅ Gratitude improves sleep. ✅ Reduces anxiety. ✅ Improves resilience. ✅ Boosts performance. Science backs it. Stanford research shows that improving sleep alone from 6.6 to 8 hours a night improved athlete performance across the board—faster reactions, better shooting percentages, and fewer mistakes. Want to be clutch? Want to show up better for yourself? Start with gratitude. Tool #2: Humor—Laugh at the Crazy Sometimes you just have to stop and go… “Well, THAT’S a ridiculous expectation.” Call it out. Laugh at it. Take its power away. “I should be perfect today.” Really? Since when did anyone master life in a day? Tool #3: The Double Standard Test Ask yourself: “If my best friend were in this exact same situation… what would I say to THEM?” Chances are, you’d be kind. You’d be supportive. You’d remind them of how far they’ve come—not how far they “should” be. Why not talk to yourself the same way? Tool #4: The Impact Check Here’s an exercise: Write this down. What is the COST of my unrealistic expectations? Do they make me better… or just miserable? Do they push me toward growth… or toward burnout? Sometimes, just seeing the damage they cause is enough to start shifting them. Tool #5: Forgiveness—Out Loud This one’s big. When the pressure is mounting, I literally say out loud to myself… “It’s okay, Riley. You’re doing the best you can with the tools you have.” Forgiveness isn’t weakness. It’s fuel for the next step forward. Tool #6: Flexibility—Let Go of Perfect Life doesn’t follow your perfect plan. Neither does growth. Being flexible isn’t giving up. It’s adjusting. It’s pivoting. It’s learning that change isn’t failure—it’s just… change. 🔥 Challenge for You Today: Pick one of these tools. Just one. Start a gratitude journal. Try the double standard test. Forgive yourself—out loud. Then ask yourself this: “What expectation have I been carrying… that I can finally let go of today?” [Closing Thought] We often create pictures of how we think our life should look right now. And typically we get angry or frustrated when it doesn’t look the way we think it should. Tear up that picture. Live YOUR life, not the imaginary one in your head. You didn’t come this far just to come this far.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #250 Cody Hagen, BYU Receiver Interview 40:38

12 days ago40:38

40:38

Cody Hagen | Faith, Football, and Finding Balance” In this episode of Mindset Matters, Riley sits down with BYU wide receiver Cody Hagen for a candid conversation about the highs and lows of being an elite athlete. From overcoming injuries and balancing life after his LDS mission to mastering the mental side of football, Cody shares powerful lessons on mindset, preparation, and handling pressure on and off the field. Plus, hear fun behind-the-scenes stories from the locker room, his best advice to young athletes, and why finding joy in the game matters most.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #249 Stop Shoulding All Over Yourself 4:26

14 days ago4:26

4:26

Title: “Stop ‘Shoulding’ All Over Yourself” Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about how the word “should” is dangerous, and it should be handled carefully. Let me ask you something: When was the last time you didn’t meet your own expectations? Be honest… how did that feel? If you're like most high performers I work with—athletes, entrepreneurs, parents—you felt like you were failing. And the wild part is, you weren’t even failing… you just set yourself up with unrealistic expectations. I work with athletes who will PR in three events, but they’ll go home upset because they “should have” done better in the 4th one. Sound familiar? We carry around this invisible scoreboard in our minds—built from other people’s voices, Instagram highlight reels, and our own brutal self-talk. We get stuck in the loop of: “I should be further along.” “I should have more wins.” “I should be better by now.” Let’s stop shoulding all over ourselves. Ok let’s do a quick check in: Grab your phone or a pen and write down one thing you’re proud of that you used to dream about but now take for granted. Pause this for 10 seconds if you need to. Do it. It matters. Why? Because when we don’t acknowledge progress, our goals become weapons instead of motivation. There’s a quote that I think originates from Socrates, but I am not sure. “What screws us up most is the picture we have in our head of how it’s supposed to be.” Let that sink in. You thought your career would look different by now. You thought you'd be more confident, more successful, more stable. But the gap between where you are and where you thought you'd be? That’s not failure—that’s the space where growth happens. You’ve heard me share this before. Roosevelt’s “Man in the Arena” speech still hits hard: “The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena… who errs… who comes short again and again… who fails while daring greatly…” Let me ask: Are you in the arena right now? If so, you're already winning—even if you’re bloody and bruised and still chasing the win. It’s important to understand: Unrealistic expectations often come with unrealistic timeframes. You want to write the book, start the business, win the starting job… this year. But maybe that goal needs three years. Maybe that dream is a marathon, not a sprint. And when you don’t hit it right away, you punish yourself for no good reason. I call it mental masochism. We beat ourselves up because we “should be” further along—based on a clock no one else is even watching. So here’s your challenge this week: Catch yourself “shoulding.” When you hear “I should be further along,” replace it with: “I’m learning.” “I’m progressing.” “I’m doing the work.” Set a realistic timeframe. Ask yourself: What’s the goal? What’s truly in my control? What’s a realistic time frame for that outcome? Remind yourself: failure is fertilizer. Not poison. Your stumbles today are the soil where greatness grows. Look—dreaming big is never the problem. Expecting yourself to sprint a marathon with no water breaks? That’s what burns people out. Be honest with where you are. Be flexible with how you get there. And most importantly, stop shoulding all over yourself. Your story’s still being written—and it’s going to be a good one.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #248 Weber State Walk-On to Cleveland Browns Linebacker with Winston Reid 38:55

15 days ago38:55

38:55

Winston Reid: From Weber State Walk-On to Cleveland Browns Linebacker | Mindset Matters Podcast Join host Riley Jensen on #MindsetMatters as he interviews Cleveland Browns linebacker Winston Reid! From overcoming two ACL injuries to walking on at Weber State and signing as an NFL free agent, Winston’s journey is packed with resilience and grit. In this episode, we dive into: How Winston bounced back from setbacks to earn an All-American title The mental toughness lessons from his Marine Corps dad His pre-game peanut butter & jelly sandwich ritual Advice for young athletes chasing their dreams Listen to the full episode on [Spotify/Apple Podcasts Link] or watch here! Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment: What’s your biggest takeaway from Winston’s story? #NFL #ClevelandBrowns #MindsetMattersPodcast #WinstonReid #MotivationalPodcast #WeberState #FootballJourney…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #247 Tools to Fight Perfectionism 4:48

15 days ago4:48

4:48

Getting to Neutral: Tools to Fight Perfectionism and Win the Mental Game Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about tools to fight perfectionism and win the mental game. Let me hit you with something right away—perfectionism isn’t a badge of honor. It’s a burden. But there’s a way out. It starts with what I call “getting to neutral.” This is about interrupting negative momentum—because when perfectionism spirals, it usually sounds like this: “I’m not good enough.” “I always screw this up.” “I can’t compete like they do.” “What if I let everyone down?” Sound familiar? Now pause. And breathe. Let me walk you through one of my favorite grounding techniques: 3-2-1 Breathe. Look around. What are 3 things you can see? What are 2 things you can hear? What’s 1 thing you can feel physically? Then… take one deep diaphragmatic breath. That’s it. That 30-second moment just broke the spiral. I recently heard a story from my friend Justin Su’a, a mental performance coach for the Tampa Bay Rays. He was 16, struggling on the mound, and it happened to be during a super important game. His dad—the coach—called a timeout. Walked up to the mound. But instead of offering advice, he asked: “Are you hungry?” Justin: “Uhhh… yeah?” “What kind of burger do you want?” Cheeseburger. Soda. His dad gives his own order too. Then walks away. That moment gave Justin a mental time out. It was the reset he needed. He refocused. They won the game. Sometimes the best way to reset is not to force yourself to "be great"—but to "just be." Here’s another technique I love: Counterarguments. Your thoughts aren’t always true just because they’re loud. If your brain says, “I don’t belong here…” Push back with: “That’s not necessarily true… I’ve worked hard, and I’ve earned this shot.” Better yet? Make a list before the storm hits—of your wins, achievements, and moments you’re proud of. Keep it close. Use it when perfectionism rears its head. Then there's what I call Caboose Arguments—because some of us are realists. And sometimes, we don’t believe our own hype. So instead of saying, “This game is going terribly,” add the caboose: “…but I’ve gotten out of worse spots.” “…but I’ve prepared for this.” “…but I know how to adjust.” Now we’re not ignoring the challenge—we’re just not letting it define the whole train. And here's one more tool: “Yet.” It’s a single word that shifts everything. “I can’t shoot like them… yet.” “I don’t know how to handle pressure… yet.” “I haven’t figured this out… yet.” That one word keeps the story going. You’re still in the fight. You are a work in progress. Need a physical reset? Build a reset routine. Athletes I work with use all kinds: Re-tightening gloves Re-doing a hair tie Tapping a control circle on their wrist Even flushing a toilet in the dugout like Ken Ravizza’s Fullerton State baseball team (yes, really) It’s all about signaling to your brain: That moment is done. Time to move on. 🎯 Let’s make it real right now. Three quick challenges for you: Practice bravery. Do one thing that makes you uncomfortable today. Apply for that job. Start that project. Ask for help. Challenge your thoughts. Next time you hear your inner critic, say: “That might not be true… because ________.” Flip your self-talk. If you wouldn’t say it to someone else, don’t say it to yourself. Listen: Perfection isn’t required to win. All you need is the courage to reset, the awareness to interrupt the spiral, and the tools to get back to the moment you’re in. You don’t have to be perfect. You just need to breathe. You’ve got this.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #246 Performance Killer in Disguise 4:22

18 days ago4:22

4:22

Perfectionism: The Performance Killer in Disguise” Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk one of the main performance killers, and how it is the master of disguise. Let me ask you a question—have you ever told yourself… “I can’t.” “I never get this right.” “I always mess up under pressure.” If so, welcome to the perfectionism club. I’m a card-carrying member myself. Perfectionism doesn’t always show up wearing a red flag. Sometimes, it sneaks in dressed as "high standards" or "I'm just super competitive." But here's the truth—it’s not drive, it’s fear. Fear of not being enough. So how do you know if you’re falling into the trap? Here are a few clues: You catastrophize when something small goes wrong. You struggle to finish things because they’re “not quite perfect.” You feel like your self-worth rises and falls with your outcomes. You constantly compare yourself to others and always come up short. You procrastinate because starting imperfectly feels worse than not starting at all. Sound familiar? It did to me too. Now here’s the big lie perfectionism whispers: “If I do it perfectly, I’ll finally be enough.” But perfection isn’t the price of admission to greatness—it’s often the reason we never buy the ticket. Take a second and think: Where in your life right now are you waiting to be perfect before you act? Is it sending the email? Launching your business? Reaching out to that coach? Say it out loud. Now commit to taking imperfect action on it this week. Ever heard of imposter syndrome? It’s that feeling like you're just lucky... like you're one mistake away from being exposed. I’ve been there. Even recording this podcast—there’s a little voice that says, “What if I’m not qualified enough?” But here’s my rule: If someone hands you a ticket to the rocketship, you get on. You figure it out on the way to Mars. Stop telling yourself why you’re not good enough. Prove to yourself that you already are. Let’s talk about flexibility. Water doesn't fight the riverbanks. It adjusts. It twists and turns. It doesn’t force progress—it flows. Your mindset, your self-talk, should work the same way. When we push too hard, we flood. When we hold too tight, we break. But when we stay flexible, we find new ways forward. Case in point: My favorite story from my father being a college tennis coach. A guy named Rob Markosian broke all his rackets during a tournament. I was in charge of restringing the rackets. I couldn’t restring them fast enough. He looked at me and yelled, “Bring me a 2x4—I’ll finish him off with that!” So I handed him a junk racket from another player. It wasn’t ideal, but he won. He didn’t need perfect—he just needed to compete. 🎯 Call to Action So here’s your challenge for this week: Stop waiting to feel ready. Stop waiting to be perfect. Start acting anyway. Start the thing. Send the message. Take the rep. Speak up. Be flexible like water. Perform like Rob with the busted racket. Your job isn’t to be flawless. Your job is to show up and fight. Don’t be afraid to chase perfect in hopes of catching excellence. What’s so wrong with being excellent, anyway? You are not a mistake. You might make mistakes—but that’s proof you’re in the game. Perfection isn’t required to win. Never has been. Let go of needing perfect. Trade it for excellence.. And I promise, your best self will thank you for it.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #245 Perfectionism is not the Path 4:45

19 days ago4:45

4:45

🎯 Perfectionism Is NOT the Path to Peak Performance Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk perfectionism, and how it is not the path to peak performance.. Let’s do a quick gut check today. Let’s talk about a silent killer of motivation and performance: perfectionism. Are you striving to be your best? That’s honorable. That’s drive. But believing you have to be perfect? That’s poison. And unfortunately, in the world of high-level performance—whether it’s athletics, business, or parenting—perfectionism often gets confused for competitiveness. The truth is, perfectionism is just insecurity with a great work ethic. Let me give you a quick analogy I use with my athletes. Imagine we’re fishing on a calm lake. Storm clouds start forming, and to steady the boat, we throw out one anchor. Smart, right? But if you’re a perfectionist, one anchor isn’t enough. You throw out another 7 anchors. And what happens? The storm passes. But now? You’re sinking. Because too many anchors—too much overthinking, over-prepping, self-criticizing—will pull you down, and it’s been known to sink ships. That’s what perfectionism does: it overwhelms and paralyzes. And it almost always invites its twin to the party—negative self-talk. You know that voice, the one that whispers: "I’m not good enough." "Why did I mess that up?" "I’m probably disappointing people." Here’s the kicker: You don’t need to be perfect to win. Let me tell you about Jim Thorpe. Quite possibly the greatest athlete in the history of the United States. In the 1912 Olympics, someone stole his track shoes. Nowhere to be found. Devastating right? Instead of panicking, Jim Thorpe found two mismatched shoes in a garbage can. One was too big for, so he wore an extra sock. He won two gold medals that day. There’s pictures all over the internet about this day. You can see his mismatched shoes and extra sock in the photo. He didn’t let perfection block performance. That’s the heart of what I want to leave you with today: 👉 Conditions don’t need to be perfect for you to win. 👉 You don’t have to feel 100% to give 100%. 👉 And that little voice in your head? It’s not always telling the truth. We use a rule in sport psychology I love: the 78% Rule. If you’re at 78%—or heck, even 53%—you can still show up, grind, compete, and win. It’s like your smart phone, it gives you 100% functionality until it dips below 5%. You are not your thoughts. You are not your worst mistake. You are your habits. You are your effort. You are your bounce-back. So here’s what I want to challenge you with this week: 🎯 Try this: Catch yourself when you use words like “I always…” or “I never…” Those are red flags for perfectionism. They are catastrophizers that are seldom true. Ask yourself: “What would I say to a teammate who made the same mistake?” (Spoiler alert: You’d probably be more kind to them than to yourself.) Write down one thing you’re proud of from today. Just one. Because guess what? Even the greats miss free throws, forget plays, drop balls, lose deals, or say the wrong thing in meetings. Perfection isn’t required. Guts are. Until next time—stay gritty, stay grounded, and remember: Effort and enthusiasm beat perfection every time. If this resonated with you, this episode was inspired by Chapter 5 of my book, Pure Unadulterated Guts. Grab your copy on Amazon. Let’s keep chasing growth. 1% better—every day.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #244 The 1% Rule that changes Everything 5:19

20 days ago5:19

5:19

🎙️ Podcast Script: “The 1% Rule That Changes Everything” (Inspired by Chapter 3 of Pure Unadulterated Guts) Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about the one percent rule that changes everything. Let me ask you something. Right now, today—are you just living, or are you getting better? Because there’s a rule I love, and it’s simple: Just get 1% better today. That’s it. Not 50%, not perfection. Just 1%. This idea comes from James Clear’s Atomic Habits, but it’s something I’ve seen over and over in elite athletes, high performers, and resilient people I’ve coached. But how do we measure it? How do you know you’re getting 1% better? We will talk about that today as well. Here’s some simple math for you: 1% better every day for a year? That’s 37 times better at the end of 365 days. 1% worse every day? You basically hit zero. Now, think about that in your life: What if your mindset improved 1% every day? What if your discipline did? What if your self-talk, your confidence, your leadership grew even just a little bit? Steve Young once said: “Compete against yourself. Be better than you were the day before.” And that’s the secret most people miss: You’re not competing against your teammate, your boss, or some random person online. You’re competing against yesterday’s version of you. 🔄 Let’s Interact: Think about today. What’s one small thing you did that made you better? Say it out loud. I’ll wait. (Pause) Maybe it was showing up. Maybe it was doing 10 minutes of focused work when you didn’t feel like it. That counts. But here’s the danger: There’s a mental trap in sport psychology called negativity bias. It’s why you can do five things right today, but your brain only remembers the two you screwed up. Ever been there? Driving home from practice—or work—and only thinking about the mistake? Yeah, Me too. So how do we beat it? Let's flip the script. Here’s a habit I want you to try starting today: At the end of the day, ask yourself this: “What’s one thing I did today that made me 1% better?” That’s it. Write it down. Speak it. Own it. This is called deliberate practice. And here’s the magic: deliberate practice + consistency = elite results. And you can plan to be deliberate or intentional on a calendar long before you get to a practice or a scenario that you need to be better. Now let’s get tactical. Here are 3 quick challenges to bring this to life: 🔥 Challenge 1 – Own Your Intentions Each day this week, pick ONE thing to get better at: Monday: Positive self-talk. Tuesday: Staying locked in during pressure. Wednesday: Gratitude. Thursday: Encouraging a teammate. Friday: Blocking out distractions. Journal it. Reflect on it. Celebrate it. 📱 Challenge 2 – Cut Comparison Try reducing or cutting out social media for a few days. Seriously. Track how you feel. Are you more present? More clear? Social media often fuels negativity bias. Less scrolling = more focus on YOU. ✅ Challenge 3 – Start. Stop. Sustain. What’s one thing you need to stop doing? What’s one thing you need to start doing? What’s something good you’re already doing that you want to sustain, for keep doing? Speak it. Write it. Act on it. Final thought: You don’t need to overhaul your whole life today. You don’t need a miracle. You need a moment. And if you can win just this moment, and then the next one after that? That’s called stacking wins. And you’ll wake up 37x better a year from now—mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. If this resonated with you—even just 1%— 📘 Grab a copy of Pure Unadulterated Guts. 🎧 Share this episode with a teammate, friend, or coach. ✍️ DM me the one thing you’re focusing on today. I actually want to hear from you. Because growth is hard. But it’s worth it. And so are you.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #243 Comparison is a Thief 5:42

21 days ago5:42

5:42

🎙️ Podcast Segment: Chapter 3 – “Comparison is a Thief, Not a Coach” Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about one of the quietest killers of confidence, motivation, and mental performance: Comparison. Let me ask you something: Have you ever scrolled through Instagram, or TikTok, or maybe just walked into a meeting or locker room… and instantly felt like you weren’t doing enough? Yeah. Me too. Today’s episode is inspired by Chapter 3 of my book Pure Unadulterated Guts, and I’m going to tell you why comparison, when unchecked, can quietly rob you of joy, grit, and presence. Let’s get into it. ⚠️ Part 1: The Comparison Trap Here’s an important point--comparison is for choosing between cars, not character. You’ve probably heard the quote, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Teddy Roosevelt said it. And in all my years coaching athletes, leaders, and teams—it’s never proven false. We compare ourselves constantly. Not just to others' success… but to their highlight reels. And we end up measuring our worst moments against someone else’s best. Let me give you a quick story. When I was in high school, I was the quarterback, point guard, and shortstop. You might think that meant I was going out every weekend. Truth is—there were plenty of Friday nights where I was home, feeling left out. Now imagine if I had social media back then, showing me exactly what I was missing in real time? That’s the world our kids live in. Heck, that’s the world we live in. So here’s a question for you: 👉 How do you feel after you scroll your feed? Do you feel energized? Inspired? Or do you feel behind… like you’re not measuring up? 🔥 Part 2: Flip the Script—From Comparison to Ignition Now, not all comparison is bad. There’s a concept I love from The Talent Code by Daniel Coyle. It’s called "ignition." It’s that moment when you see someone like you doing something incredible—and it sparks your drive. I remember watching Ty Detmer play QB at BYU when I was in high school. He was nothing short of amazing. He was 6 feet tall. He had blond hair. He had similar traits to me. And that lit a fire in me—it ignited something. So comparison can fuel you, if it inspires action. But if it causes self-doubt or paralysis, it’s time to check yourself. Here’s how: Ask yourself: 👉 Is what I’m seeing on social media sparking action? Or is it causing me to shrink? That question alone can reset your relationship with your feed. 🧠 Part 3: Be Where Your Feet Are—Use W.I.N. Here’s a tool that I teach to elite athletes—and I use it myself all the time. It’s called W.I.N. — "What’s Important Now?" Let me break it down real quick. When you’re in a game—or in life—and you make a mistake, or you feel pressure rising, comparison often creeps in. You start time traveling—into the past (“I should have done better”) or the future (“What if I mess up again?”). W.I.N. brings you back to the present. Ask yourself the question: 👉 What’s Important Now? Not 5 minutes ago. Not next quarter. Right now. I’ve had athletes write this on their cleats, gloves, even their mirror at home. The present moment is the only place performance lives. If you can consistently be where your feet are—you’re already winning.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #242 When the Alarm Goes Off 4:49

22 days ago4:49

4:49

🎙️ PODCAST MINI-EPISODE: “When the Alarm Goes Off – Motivation, Grit & the Brain” Hello everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today we are talking about when the alarm in your head goes off, and how your amygdala can hijack your brain. Let me ask you something: Have you ever felt like you were doing everything right—but your motivation just disappeared? If so, you're not broken. You're wired that way. 💥 In this episode, I want to unpack something powerful from Chapter 3 of my book Pure Unadulterated Guts—the three biggest killers of motivation: Comparison Perfectionism Unrealistic expectations Now before I break these down, I want to tell you a story. A real one. One that shook me. One night, after tucking in my kids with the usual prayers and stories, I crawled into bed thinking the day was done. At 2:47 a.m., our alarm system gave that gentle, terrifying pre-alarm chirp—the one that says: “Get up now or the house is about to sound like a nuclear reactor.” Groggy. Annoyed. Irritated. I got out of bed, walked to the kitchen, and my wife whispered: “Wait... this alarm has never gone off by mistake.” Boom. That’s when the real alarm hit. It was loud. It was terrifying. And it made it hard to think correctly. Suddenly, the college football player in me took over. I sprinted to my kids’ rooms, checked every corner. The alarm system said the back door had been breached. So I sprinted downstairs… And sure enough—it was slightly open. Wind? Kids? I wasn’t sure. But when we checked the security camera in my office, which is right next to that door... what we saw sent chills down my spine. A shadowy figure had come into our home. He stepped into the hallway—then bolted when the alarm went off. By the time I got downstairs... he was already gone. 😳 I share this because motivation, clarity, and grit are never just about mindset. They’re biological. Our brains have an ancient alarm system—the amygdala. It's designed to keep us alive. But in today’s world, it's constantly reacting to things that aren’t life-threatening. 📉 When the alarm goes off, decision-making tanks. We don't think. We react. In sports and life, this looks like: Getting in your own head Losing confidence over one bad performance Forgetting the 100 things you did well, and obsessing over the one thing you didn’t 🎯 Here's where it gets personal. I work with a pro golfer named who recently earned his PGA Tour card. That’s a huge deal. But here’s what most people don’t realize: He didn’t need to overhaul his swing. He didn’t need a miracle. He improved by just 0.79 strokes per round to become a PGA tour member. Less than a stroke! But here’s the kicker: That tiny improvement moved him from rank 90-something to 26th on the Korn Ferry Tour. Just one stroke shy of his dream—and the next year he finished by improving to 19th and received his PGA tour card. 📌 So what does this mean for you? Here’s your gut-check moment: Are you letting comparison steal your joy? Are you chasing perfection instead of progress? Are your expectations so high that you can’t even see your own growth? If the alarm bells are going off in your life right now—it might be time to breathe. To pause. And to recognize that small wins are still wins. 🧠 Here’s a challenge: Track just one small win per day for the next week. It could be: You showed up. You stayed composed. You spoke kindly to yourself when it got hard. Build that muscle. Train that brain. And remember: Motivation doesn’t disappear—it gets drowned out by noise. You can turn the alarm down. You can get back on track. You’ve got Pure Unadulterated Guts. Let’s use it. 🎧 Want to go deeper? Grab Chapter 3 of the book and learn the tools I teach to elite athletes for beating comparison, perfectionism, and unrealistic expectations. Let’s make high performance a habit—not a fluke.…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #242 Breathe for Clarity 6:32

25 days ago6:32

6:32

🎙️ PODCAST SCRIPT “Breathe Until You Find Clarity” – Inspired by Chapter 3 of Pure Unadulterated Guts "If you don’t control your breath, you’ll never control your mind. And if you don’t control your mind—you’ll never control your performance.” Let me ask you something: When life hits you in the teeth—what’s your first response? For most of us, it’s panic. Frustration. Freeze mode. But there’s something hiding in plain sight that can help you take back control almost instantly. It’s not complicated. It’s not new. It’s just underused. It’s your breath. 🧠 Part 1: The Breath That Builds Grit I want to teach you something called the physiological sigh—a simple, science-backed breathing technique that resets your nervous system fast. This isn’t just for yogis or monks. It’s for athletes before a game-winning kick... soldiers under fire... parents in the car... and anyone caught in the chaos of everyday life. Dr. Andrew Huberman, a neuroscientist at Stanford, explains how this technique taps into the body's built-in stress release valve. It helps you offload carbon dioxide and reclaim clarity when stress hijacks your system. Here’s how to do it: ✅ Inhale deeply through your nose. ✅ Then sneak in a second, quicker inhale on top of the first. ✅ Then exhale long and slow through your mouth. Let’s do it together: Big inhale… Now another quick sip of air on top… Now exhale slowly… like you’re deflating. Again. Double inhale through the nose. Long exhale through the mouth. You feel that shift? That’s your brain and body syncing back up. That’s clarity on demand. Just one to three of these can calm your system down, sharpen your mind, and give you back control. You can use it: In the car before a tough conversation On the sideline after a turnover At work when you feel overwhelmed Or at night when your brain won’t shut off This is mental performance training in real time. 💪 Part 2: Grit Grows When You Breathe Let me tell you a story from my Snow College days. I had a teammate—John South. He was buried on the depth chart behind two NFL-bound receivers. Never traveled. No glamour. No crowd. Just home games and scout team duty. For three straight years. But he never stopped grinding. Never complained. And he out-hustled every single one of us. Every. Day. Late in one blowout game, he finally got a shot—just one play. And he made a great catch. That was his only catch at Snow College. Most people would’ve folded the tent right there. But John kept breathing. Kept believing. Kept working. He walked on at Utah State—got laughed out of the room. Transferred to Adams State. And that’s where the switch flipped: Two-time All-Conference. All-American. Over 1,100 yards in a season. Why? Because he didn’t let his present define his future. Because he had pure unadulterated guts. 🧠 Part 3: Mindset + Purpose = Grit Here’s the truth: grit isn’t magic—it’s muscle. And like any muscle, you can train it. The most resilient people I know do a few key things: They face fear head-on. They lean on faith. They stay physically active. They know their purpose. They keep learning. If you want grit, you’ve got to build it. And your breath is a powerful place to start. 🎯 CALL TO ACTION: Let’s Get Interactive 🔵 Challenge 1 – Breathing Reset Next time you feel rattled—miss a shot, get cut off in traffic, or feel like yelling at your kid—pause. Double inhale through your nose. Long exhale through your mouth. Do it 2 or 3 times. See how it clears the mental clutter. 🔴 Challenge 2 – Do the Work If you're in a funk right now, don’t just sit there. Move. Take one action. Because momentum builds confidence. As I like to say, “The good Lord can’t steer a parked car.” This adversity you're facing? It might just be your launching pad. You’ve got Pure Unadulterated Guts in you. Now breathe... and go prove it..…

Mindset Matters

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Episode #241 What Your Kids Need Most (Especially from Dads) 5:05

27 days ago5:05