Interview with Marcus Rodriguez: Recovering from chronic invalidation

A Little Help For Our Friends

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46:43

Think you know ChatGPT's custom GPTs? 🤔 Probably not. Last week, we tackled the basics and what's new with OpenAI's refreshed GPTs. For this AI Working Wednesdays episode, we're getting into some advanced techniques to hep you win back time. ↳ using the crazy powerful o3 model to your GPT's advantage ↳ context stacking ↳ custom actions to connect to third party sites Yeah.... don't sleep on this one shorties. Ep 563: ChatGPT's New Custom GPT's: Advanced techniques to win back time Newsletter: Sign up for our free daily newsletter More on this Episode: Episode Page Join the discussion: Thoughts on this? Join the convo and connect with other AI leaders on LinkedIn. Upcoming Episodes: Check out the upcoming Everyday AI Livestream lineup Website: YourEverydayAI.com Email The Show: info@youreverydayai.com Connect with Jordan on LinkedIn Topics Covered in This Episode: Custom GPTs: Advanced Techniques Overview OpenAI's Context Stacking Strategy O3 Model's Thinking Capabilities Building Efficient Custom GPTs Custom Actions and API Integration Zapier Integration for Dynamic Data ChatGPT's Context Window Management Creating Evergreen Podcast Content Timestamps: 00:00 Custom GPTs: Evolution and Insights 03:23 "Mastering GPT Context Stacking" 09:31 "Context Stacking in Chat GPT" 11:20 GPT Context Switching Advantage 15:33 Customizable GPT Usage Explained 19:51 Evergreen Episode Update Strategy 21:44 Optimizing AI for Continued Learning 23:48 "O-Series Models: Advanced AI Capabilities" 28:41 Building GPTs for Episode Research 30:03 GPT Model Customization and Sharing 33:18 Securing API Keys in GPTs 36:55 Zapier Enhances GPT Email Capabilities 42:12 "Use Chrome Extensions for Tokens" 43:48 "AI at Work Wednesdays Survey" Keywords: OpenAI's custom GPTs, advanced techniques, save time, context stacking, o three model, ChatGPT updates, logic and reasoning, plan ahead capabilities, agentic tools, custom actions, third party data, API, building GPTs, leveraging AI, context window, transformer model, generative AI, organization usage, fine tuning performance, productivity enhancement, AI agents, AI tools integration, custom configuration, everyday applications, tech strategies, new rendition, midweek break, AI experts, smarter AI usage, AI-powered planning, AI transformations. Ep 563: ChatGPT's New Custom GPT's: Advanced techniques to win back time Send Everyday AI and Jordan a text message. (We can't reply back unless you leave contact info) Ready for ROI on GenAI? Go to youreverydayai.com/partner…

2 years ago 1:11:57

MP3•Episode home

One of the biggest puzzles is why some people carry so much anger, pain, depression, or anxiety even though they haven't experienced a "real trauma." This might be a sign of chronic invalidation, when someone received consistent messages that their emotions aren't valid when they're growing up. Chronic invalidation can infect early caregiving environments and can have devastating impacts on mental health in adulthood. In this episode, we talk with Dr. Marcus Rodriguez, associate professor of Pitzer College, Director of the Global Mental Health Lab and founder of the Youth and Family Institute (not to mention, our "lab brother" from Duke). Dr. Rodriguez describes what chronic invalidation looks like and how it can be treated with evidence-based therapies.

To learn more about Dr. Rodriguez's clinical services for family and adolescents, check out his Youth & Family Institute
To learn more about clinical trainings with Dr. Rodriguez, check out his training services

Support the show

If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform. In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one.

Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive.

For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com

148 episodes

#Society #Relationship #Jacqueline Trumbull and Kibby McMahon #Jacqueline Trumbull #Kibby McMahon #Fitness #Mental Health #Caregivers #Psychology #Psychotherapy #Psychiatry #Cognitive Behavioral Therapy #Bachelor In Paradise #Clinical Psychology #Sexuality #The Bachelor

Interview with Marcus Rodriguez: Recovering from chronic invalidation

A Little Help For Our Friends

published 2 years ago

MP3•Episode home

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response)

To learn more about Dr. Rodriguez's clinical services for family and adolescents, check out his Youth & Family Institute
To learn more about clinical trainings with Dr. Rodriguez, check out his training services

Support the show

If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform. In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one.

Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive.

For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com

148 episodes

All episodes

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Love Island USA Analysis Part 1: Untangling Reality TV Relationship Dynamics 1:08:53

3 days ago1:08:53

1:08:53

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Ever wondered what reality TV can teach us about psychology? In this episode, we put our mental health expertise to "work" analyzing the relationship dynamics on the first 17 episodes of Season 7 of "Love Island USA," revealing fascinating patterns that mirror what therapists see in couples therapy every day. Tell us your thoughts using the "send us a text" link above! The villa becomes our laboratory as we dissect the pursue-withdraw dynamic playing out between contestants like Ace and Amaya. Watch as we unpack how Ace masterfully maintains emotional distance while keeping women interested. His approach to "boundaries" offers a compelling case study in how this psychological concept can sometimes be misused in relationships. We then turn our attention to Huda and Jeremiah, whose turbulent relationship showcases textbook anxious attachment behaviors. From the infamous "pancake incident" to America's devastating vote, we explore how Huda's core fear of abandonment drives her reactions, while Jeremiah's tendency to withdraw only intensifies the conflict. Their interactions reveal how quickly attachment patterns emerge under pressure, and why some contestants lock into relationships immediately while others maintain strategic distance. Whether you're a Love Island fan or just curious about relationship psychology, we explore attachment styles, communication patterns, and emotional intelligence that apply far beyond the villa. ** Join our KulaMind Community that launches Monday July 14th! 50% off the first month for podcast listeners! We share our expert tactics for managing our loved ones' mental and emotional issues. Secure your spot at this founding member discount! Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
The Fight You Didn’t Mean to Start: Why Conflict Escalates and How to Defuse It 1:14:25

11 days ago1:14:25

1:14:25

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Ever felt yourself going from calm to explosive in seconds flat? Or watched someone you care about transform into a raging stranger over something seemingly small? In this episode, we dive deep into the anatomy of emotional explosions - those high-conflict moments that can damage relationships and leave lasting scars. We unpack why these blowups happen, exploring how they often represent a reassertion of power when someone feels threatened, undermined, or disrespected. If you need more tips, get our free guide to De-Escalating Emotional Explosions. Drawing from relationship research and our clinical experience, we examine the triggers that spark these explosions. We talk about how many explosive relationships involve confusion between authentic self-expression and harmful communication patterns. Recognizing John Gottman's "Four Horsemen" of relationship conflict (criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling), we list practical strategies for defusing emotional explosions. Most importantly, we provide clear alternatives to these destructive patterns. Whether you're the one who explodes or you're walking on eggshells around someone who does, we offer compassionate understanding and actionable techniques to transform your communication. ** Join our KulaMind Community that launches July 14th! 50% off the first month for podcast listeners! Our community is an exclusive group of people navigating their loved ones' mental health and emotional issues. You'll get direct coaching on proven strategies for managing emotional crises, communicating effectively, and supporting your loved ones without losing yourself. Learn more here. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
The Cost of Anxious Attachment: When Someone's Insecurities Make You Question Your Worth 1:09:37

18 days ago1:09:37

1:09:37

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Do you ever feel like you're walking on eggshells around someone who constantly needs reassurance? In this episode, we tackle anxious attachment from a different angle - not just what it feels like to be anxiously attached, but how that attachment style can impact the self-esteem and identity of those on the receiving end. Drawing from personal experiences, we explore how anxious attachment manifests beyond just seeking love and reassurance. When someone constantly questions whether you love them enough, it can lead to profound questions about your character: Am I really selfish? Am I incapable of loving properly? We unpack the phenomenon of "projection," where anxiously attached people might interpret neutral actions through their lens of insecurity, creating narratives that shift how you see yourself. We also address how kernels of truth can be exploited to create damaging narratives - how normal human traits can be weaponized to support an anxious person's fear that they're not loved enough. For both those with anxious attachment patterns and those on the receiving end or "the avoidant attached" folks, we offer practical strategies. Rather than pathologizing either side, we emphasize how understanding these dynamics can lead to healthier connections where both people's identities remain intact. **Do attachment insecurities mean blow-up fights in your relationship? We made something just for you: A guide to "De-Escalating Emotional Explosions." **We have something really exciting coming up...Our KulaMind "From Chaos to Connection" course and community launches July 14th! There's a limited number of spots to keep the group intimate, so book a free call to apply. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Understanding Others' Minds: The Science of Mind-Reading in Borderline Personality Disorder 1:01:05

25 days ago1:01:05

1:01:05

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) What happens when you can't understand what others are thinking or feeling? Why do some people constantly misinterpret your intentions? The answers lie in a fascinating psychological process called mentalization. Mentalization—our ability to understand the thoughts, feelings, and intentions of others and ourselves—forms the foundation of healthy relationships. When this process goes awry, as it often does in Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), relationships become minefields of misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and confusion. In this episode, we delve into Jacqueline's dissertation topic of how mentalization can go awry with deep shame and personality pathology. Shame emerges as the critical factor that disrupts mentalization. Those with BPD often carry core beliefs about being defective or unlovable, coloring how they interpret others' thoughts about them. If you believe you're worthless, you'll likely assume others see you that way too, regardless of evidence. This creates patterns of negative assumptions without sufficient proof that can become self-fulfilling prophecies as relationships deteriorate. The social media landscape introduces new challenges, bombarding us with inconsistent feedback that mirrors the chaotic responses some experienced in childhood. When hundreds love you and hundreds hate you simultaneously, how do you form a coherent sense of self? Ready to learn more? Our community and group course launches July 14th—visit KulaMind.com to join the waitlist and gain the skills to navigate relationships with loved ones facing mental health challenges. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
The Science of Co-Regulation: Building Safety in Relationships 1:00:40

5 weeks ago1:00:40

1:00:40

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Ever wonder why holding your partner's hand during a stressful moment instantly calms you down? The answer lies in the fascinating neurobiological dance of co-regulation – when two nervous systems attune to and influence each other, creating safety, connection, and resilience that neither person could achieve alone. In this episode, we explore the multidimensional nature of co-regulation in romantic relationships, moving beyond the simplistic idea that partners merely "calm each other down." Through personal stories – including TWO exciting life updates for Jacqueline! – we unpack how healthy relationships support each other across three different levels of connection. The science is compelling. Research shows that a loving partner's touch literally reduces brain activity in regions associated with threat response. But we also tackle the shadow side: when does the need for co-regulation cross into dependency, control, or emotional manipulation? How do we balance healthy interdependence with personal responsibility for our emotional lives? Whether you're currently partnered or not, understanding co-regulation reveals profound truths about human connection. We're biologically wired to share emotional burdens, amplify each other's joy, and create meaning together. By developing awareness of our emotional patterns and protective mechanisms, we can transform relationships from battlegrounds into sanctuaries where both people feel safe enough to be fully themselves. ***If you're like "wow that sounds good, but I have NO idea how to co-regulate with my partner," then you've come to the right place- that's what we teach at KulaMind . We're launching our exclusive KulaMind community July 14th , which we're not technically supposed to tell you yet...oh well. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
When One Chases and the Other Runs: Understanding the Pursuer-Withdrawer Dynamics in Couples 1:00:33

6 weeks ago1:00:33

1:00:33

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Feeling stuck in the same arguments with your partner? Does it feel like a cycle of one of you is chasing and the other is running away? In this episode, we talk about the problematic cycle behind recurring relationship conflicts through the lens of Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT). We break down the pursuer-withdrawer dynamic: that frustrating cycle where one person pushes for connection while the other pulls away. What looks like rejection or criticism on the surface actually masks deeper attachment needs and fears. You may be the one desperately trying to get your partner to engage, or one who shuts down when emotions run high. We argue that pursuers and withdrawers are actually fighting for the relationship in their own ways. Drawing from recent EFT research and our personal experiences, these patterns develop from childhood experiences and attachment styles. We also talk about important strategies for breaking this pursue-withdrawal cycle of disconnection. For example, we cover TEMPO framework that helps couples identify what triggers their defensive reactions and how to communicate underlying needs more effectively. We also discuss how co-regulation and vulnerability can break destructive cycles and create deeper connection. **If you are in a relationship with someone struggling with explosive emotions, you may be caught in these destructive cycles. Book a free call with Dr. Kibby to learn about how the KulaMind program helps people like you break the cycle. Resources: Johnson, S. (2022). The hold me tight workbook: a couple's guide for a lifetime of love . Little, Brown Spark. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Self-Hatred: Wrestling With The Hidden Demon 1:15:48

8 weeks ago1:15:48

1:15:48

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Have you ever had the unsettling realization that perhaps you don't like yourself very much? That underneath all your accomplishments, relationships, and hard work, there's a persistent voice whispering that you're somehow fundamentally flawed? In this very personal episode, we dive into the connection between childhood trauma and the development of negative core beliefs that can manifest as self-loathing. When children experience abuse or emotional neglect, especially from parents who refuse to acknowledge their harmful behavior, the child often internalizes the belief that they're inherently bad, broken, or unlovable. What makes this particularly painful is how these beliefs become woven into the fabric of our identity. The path toward healing begins with recognizing that self-hatred isn't your true voice—it's a protective strategy developed when you had no other options. By approaching these disowned parts with curiosity and compassion rather than fear, we can begin to release their grip on our lives. While we may never receive the validation and accountability we deserve from those who hurt us, we can find new ways to nurture and accept those wounded parts of ourselves. Whether you're struggling with self-criticism or supporting someone who is, this episode offers an intimate peek into understanding how early trauma shapes our relationship with ourselves and practical steps toward reclaiming the parts we've been taught to fear and hate. **If you or someone you love struggles with self hatred, book a call to see how Dr. Kibby with KulaMind can help. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Sex After Trauma: How PTSD Affects Sexual Intimacy 57:18

9 weeks ago57:18

57:18

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) The invisible connection between trauma and sexual intimacy affects countless relationships, yet remains largely hidden in silence and shame. In this episode, we dive deep into why PTSD creates significant barriers to healthy sexual function—even when the original trauma had nothing to do with sex. Sexual arousal shares remarkable physiological similarities with threat response, creating a devastating paradox for trauma survivors. The racing heart, flushed skin, and heightened sensitivity that should signal pleasure become warning signs of danger to a traumatized nervous system. Beyond the physiological responses, trauma rewires our capacity for connection. Partners often interpret this withdrawal as personal rejection, creating a destructive cycle that leaves both feeling isolated and misunderstood. If you or someone you love struggles with trauma's impact on intimacy, know that recovery is possible. Effective trauma treatment can help break the association between arousal and threat. Partners play a crucial role by educating themselves about PTSD, creating safety without enabling avoidance, and maintaining patience through the healing process. Digital self-help resources and specialized trauma therapy can provide accessible starting points for reconnecting with your capacity for intimacy after trauma. **Have you noticed how trauma affects your relationships? Healing happens when we break the silence around these struggles. If you walk to talk through it and get help, book a call with Dr. Kibby. Resources: PTSD Coach Mobile app Rebound Health Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Interview with Dr. Jordan Quaglia: The Science of We-Care beyond Self-Care 1:11:59

10 weeks ago1:11:59

1:11:59

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Do we always have to choose between caring for ourselves vs. caring for others? Nope! Dr. Jordan Quaglia, associate professor at Naropa University, introduces us to "We-Care" – a revolutionary approach to caring that blends self-care and caring for others into an integrated practice where they mutually reinforce each other. Drawing from over a decade of research in mindfulness, compassion, and boundaries, Dr. Quaglia explains how self-care has evolved from a medical term to today's ubiquitous wellness practice, but suggests we're now ready for something more interconnected. The conversation delves into "care blind spots" – patterns in how we approach care that remain invisible to us. Some people habitually prioritize others at their own expense, while others may emphasize self-care to the point of undermining their social connections. When discussing boundaries, Dr. Quaglia challenges conventional wisdom. Rather than seeing boundaries merely as expressions of self-care, he reframes them as actions that modify social situations to better align with our needs, values, and goals – while remaining awake to how our boundaries affect others. Healthy boundaries, when rooted in We-Care, balance both protection and connection. At the end of the conversation, Dr. Quaglia leads us through a "reverse self-compassion" practice that embodies We-Care principles, showing us what Dr. Qualia calls an "undivided heart" – the capacity to hold both self-care and care for others simultaneously. ***If you have a loved one with mental illness and struggle to set boundaries, take care of yourself AND them at the same time, book a call with Dr. Kibby to learn how the KulaMind program can help. Resources: Check out Dr. Quaglia's new book hot off the presses: "From Self-Care to WeCare: The New Science of Mindful Boundaries and Caring from an Undivided Heart" Dr. Quaglia's IG @mindfulboundaries Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Triangulation: How Loved Ones Get Stuck in Toxic Relationship Dynamics 58:16

11 weeks ago58:16

58:16

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Have you ever noticed a never-ending cycle of drama amongst your family or friend group? In this episode, we talk about how the Drama Triangle might be the hidden pattern keeping your relationships stuck in painful cycles. Whether you're supporting a loved one with mental illness or navigating difficult family dynamics, this pattern will keep you trapped in the pain instead of solving it. Stephen Karpman's Drama Triangle describes three roles that create and sustain relationship dysfunction: the Victim (feeling helpless and powerless), the Persecutor (critical and blaming), and the Rescuer (rushing to fix problems). What makes this pattern so challenging is how people shift between these roles, maintaining the pain while never actually resolving underlying issues. We identify places where we can spot the drama triangle in our own lives—from childhood experiences with divorced parents to adult relationships—showing how these patterns created confusion and heartache. These triangles often form because we're desperately trying to maintain stability, even when that stability is painful. The good news is that understanding these patterns gives you the power to break free. We explore practical ways to step outside your habitual role and ultimately break down the triangle entirely. Rather than seeing these behaviors as character flaws, we frame them as adaptations that once served a purpose but may now be limiting your growth and happiness. This conversation highlights how recognizing these patterns can help you create more authentic connections with loved ones struggling with mental health challenges. Check out KulaMind.com to learn more about our online platform designed to help you break toxic patterns and find peace while supporting someone with mental illness. Resources: https://karpmandramatriangle.com/dt_article_only.html Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Interview with Paula Croxson: An Insider Look into Polyamory 1:10:47

12 weeks ago1:10:47

1:10:47

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) What if we've been thinking about love all wrong? What if the idea that we must choose just one person to love deeply is simply a cultural construct rather than an inherent truth about human relationships? In this episode, we discuss with Paula Croxson, our friend and practicing polyamorist how we can challenge foundational assumptions about romantic love and connection. This discussion was inspired by reactions from our previous episodes on ethical non-monogamy as a lot of you Little Helpers were curious to hear more about how this actually works in real life. Paula shares her three-year journey into polyamory after spending most of her life in monogamous relationships, offering a thoughtful perspective on what it means to love multiple people simultaneously. We explore how polyamory creates space for radical honesty and communication unlike anything our guest had experienced in monogamous relationships. These conversations about boundaries, needs, and expectations aren't just helpful for polyamorous arrangements – they're valuable tools for any relationship. The polyamorous community's emphasis on transparency creates opportunities to discuss topics that might remain unaddressed in traditional partnerships. The discussion delves into complex emotional territory – examining jealousy not as something to eliminate but as information that helps identify unmet needs. We contrast this with compersion, the experience of finding joy in your partner's happiness with others. Our guest shares practical insights about navigating multiple partnerships, including scheduling challenges, communication practices, and managing new relationship energy while honoring established connections. Polyamory allows people to design relationships based on their authentic desires rather than societal expectations – creating connections that can be deeply meaningful without following conventional scripts. This interesting conversation makes us consider what aspects of polyamorous communication and boundary-setting might benefit any type of relationship – monogamous or not. Resources: Hardy, J. W., & Easton, D. (2017). The ethical slut: A practical guide to polyamory, open relationships, and other freedoms in sex and love . Ten Speed Press. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Interview with Madison Errichiello: Love is Blind, Loss, and Healing through Trauma 1:01:51

13 weeks ago1:01:51

1:01:51

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Madison Errichiello steps out of the "Love is Blind" pods and into a raw, illuminating conversation about healing from trauma and finding strength in vulnerability. Known for her openness about mental health on the show, Madison joins us to reveal the deeper layers behind what viewers saw – and how reality TV editing shaped public perception of her journey. "I don't wear this trauma as a coat," Madison explains, addressing misconceptions about her willingness to discuss her difficult past. Growing up between two drastically different households, Madison developed resilience alongside complex relationship patterns. She candidly explores how these experiences shaped her attachment style and the fear of being "too much" for partners. The conversation moves beyond labels as Madison unpacks what it means to be "avoidant" in relationships while actively working toward security. Through her experiences with sudden loss and grief, Madison offers powerful insights into why certain boundaries – like asking loved ones to text when they arrive safely – stem from a place of care rather than control. Perhaps most striking is Madison's approach to newfound fame and criticism. Rather than obsessively consuming public opinion, she's established healthy boundaries to protect her mental health. This self-assurance challenges the narrative that confident women need "humbling" and offers a masterclass in distinguishing between others' projections and personal truth. Whether you're healing from relational trauma, navigating attachment issues, or simply curious about the real person beyond reality TV editing, this conversation offers compassionate wisdom about holding life with "a looser grip" and finding peace through self-acceptance. **If you are dealing with the mental health or addiction problems of a partner, family member or friend, co-host Dr. Kibby can support you through KulaMind, a coaching program and community made just for you. Through KulaMind, she can help you make sense of the chaos, set healthy boundaries, and break toxic dynamics. Book a free call with her to learn more. Check out KulaMind.com Resources: Follow Madison on Instagram @mads.err and Tik Tok @mads.err Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
Self-Pity: The Social Costs of Wallowing In Your Troubles 59:30

14 weeks ago59:30

59:30

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Ever found yourself wanting to scream when someone launches into their hundredth "woe is me" monologue? Yep, we've been there. In this episode, we talk about one of the more isolating coping mechanisms: self-pity. We break down exactly what makes self-pity so aggravating for loved ones—that toxic combination of helplessness, victim mentality, and emotional quicksand that seems to pull everyone down. Unlike genuine sadness or grief, self-pity comes with an external locus of control that rejects solutions while demanding endless reassurance. It's the "help me, help me, but don't help me" dynamic that leaves friends, partners, and even therapists feeling utterly powerless. We explore the psychology behind why people get stuck in self-pitying patterns, the difference between legitimate suffering and wallowing, and the crucial distinction between self-pity ("poor me") and self-compassion ("poor us"). For those drowning in self-pity, we offer actionable strategies to reconnect with agency and break free from the cycle. For the exhausted supporters, we provide practical tools like "dropping the rope" and setting boundaries without drowning in guilt. Whether you're dealing with a chronically self-pitying loved one or catching yourself falling into these patterns, the way out of self-pity isn't more reassurance—it's recognizing that even in our darkest moments, we always have a choice. **If you're struggling with a loved one consumed with self pity, book a free call with Dr. Kibby to see you can get expert insights and strategies through KulaMind. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

1
MySpace Top Eight: How We're Haunted By Our Teenage Popularity 1:00:24

15 weeks ago1:00:24

1:00:24

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) The wounds of high school popularity - or lack thereof - run surprisingly deep. In this episode, we explore how our teenage and adolescent social status continues to shape our self-concept decades later, informing how we navigate relationships, perceive our value, and approach social hierarchies. We dive into research that reveals the complex relationship between adolescent popularity and adult personality traits, discovering if we have qualities that determine whether or not we're going to be "popular" throughout our life. The podcast gets personal as we share our own teenage experiences - from the notorious MySpace "Top 8" friendship rankings that could ruin a week, to the Valentine's Day carnation deliveries that made social hierarchies painfully visible. We talk about how these experiences become formative to our identities because adolescence represents our first real attachment to figures outside our families, creating patterns that can last a lifetime. For those still carrying these wounds, we offer science-backed perspectives for healing. Most importantly, recognizing that high school popularity often rewards conformity rather than originality allows us to reframe our experiences as badges of uniqueness rather than rejection. Whether you were a queen bee, completely overlooked, or somewhere in between, we offer validation, understanding, and a path toward finally healing those stubborn teenage wounds. Subscribe to explore more topics at the intersection of mental health, relationships, and personal growth that help us all become better supporters to those we love. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

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Long-Distance Love: Making It Work When Miles Apart 1:00:45

16 weeks ago1:00:45

1:00:45

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Distance makes the heart grow fonder—or does it? In this episode, we explore long-distance relationships and what the research actually shows about couples who love across miles. We share our own varied experiences with long-distance love—from casual dating situations to serious commitments. Different relationship styles and personal attachment patterns dramatically impact how well distance works. Low-jealousy partners may thrive while anxious attachment can transform distance from challenging to excruciating. Communication presents unique hurdles when you're apart—text messages lose tone, calls require scheduling, and the spontaneity of everyday connection disappears. We identify creative strategies that help bridge the gap. The ultimate question emerges: is long-distance simply pressing pause on your relationship, or can it actually strengthen your connection in ways proximity never could? Whether you're contemplating a period apart from your partner or currently navigating the challenges of loving from afar, w e explore how to maintain connection when miles separate you from the one you love—and when to know if the distance might actually be revealing deeper relationship incompatibilities. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Your Brain on Extremes: How All-or-Nothing Thinking Affects Mental Health 1:13:15

17 weeks ago1:13:15

1:13:15

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) We all know those moments—when everything feels either perfect or disastrous, when someone is either completely trustworthy or utterly toxic. "All-or-nothing," "black-and-white," or dichotomous thinking, shapes our relationships, political views, and self-perception in profound ways. But where does this all-or-nothing approach come from, and why is it so hard to escape? In this episode, we dive deep into the surprising evolutionary purpose behind rigid thinking patterns. Far from simply being a cognitive flaw, black and white thinking often emerges as a survival mechanism for those who've experienced trauma or instability. The problem arises when we carry these protective patterns into everyday life, relationships, and social media interactions where complexity is essential. We explore how dichotomous thinking manifests differently across various conditions—from personality disorders where it permeates every interaction to PTSD where it might remain confined to specific triggers. We share personal examples, research findings, and practical strategies for recognizing when you've fallen into extreme thinking. Then, we outline the evidence-based strategies for breaking free of the extremes of dichotomous thinking. Whether you're dealing with a loved one who sees the world in absolutes or noticing this pattern in yourself, we understand why our brains crave certainty and how embracing the gray areas might be the key to deeper connections and better mental health. We offer both compassion for why we develop these patterns and concrete tools for finding your way back to nuance. Resources: Bonfá‐Araujo, B., Oshio, A., & Hauck‐Filho, N. (2022). Seeing Things in Black‐and‐White: A Scoping Review on Dichotomous Thinking Style1. Japanese Psychological Research , 64 (4), 461-472. Jonason, P. K., Oshio, A., Shimotsukasa, T., Mieda, T., Csathó, Á., & Sitnikova, M. (2018). Seeing the world in black or white: The Dark Triad traits and dichotomous thinking. Personality and Individual Differences , 120 , 102-106. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Arrested Development: The Generational Trauma of Emotionally Immature Parents 1:02:47

18 weeks ago1:02:47

1:02:47

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Are your parents bad at dealing with difficult emotions? Do they fall apart, ignore, criticize or withdraw when you need them the most? Emotional immaturity in parents causes profound ripple effects through generations, creating patterns many of us don't recognize until we're deep into adulthood. Based on Dr. Lindsay Gibson's model of emotional immaturity, we describe the four distinct types of emotionally immature parents —emotional, driven, passive, and rejecting—and how each type uniquely shapes their children's development. We explore why this topic has exploded in popularity, tracing it back to historical contexts that shaped how each generation views parenting. When survival is the primary goal, emotional complexity takes a back seat, creating generations of parents who never developed the skills to handle their own emotions, let alone support their children's emotional growth. When children's own personal growth is stunted by a dysfunctional family, they adopt specific roles as survival mechanisms that often persist into adulthood, limiting their full expression and causing recurring relationship challenges. Whether you're struggling with an emotionally immature parent or recognizing these patterns in yourself as a parent, we suggest a path toward healing. This path includes awareness, grieving what you didn't receive, exploring yourself beyond your family role, and developing boundaries based on mutual respect rather than obligation. If you're ready to break free from toxic dynamics with immature parents and discover your authentic self outside of these roles, book a free call with Dr. Kibby to learn how she can guide you through your healing journey. Resources: Gibson, L. C. (2015). Adult children of emotionally immature parents: How to heal from distant, rejecting, or self-involved parents . New Harbinger Publications. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Why Are They Acting Like a Child? Understanding Emotional Immaturity 1:01:55

19 weeks ago1:01:55

1:01:55

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) When your dating a guy who isn't ready to settle down or your friend whines for not getting what she wants, you roll your eyes and think "they're so immature." But what does being "mature" mean, exactly? In this episode, we nerd out over the concept of emotional immaturity, the developmental aspects that contribute to it, and how it manifests in adult interactions. From understanding the signs of immaturity to addressing the struggle of setting healthy boundaries, we figure out what's needed to navigate emotionally challenging relationships. This episode was inspired by one of our Little Helper fans who shared with us a story of questioning her relationship to her boyfriend who is kind, respectful and loving, but just felt like a "young soul." When she met a man who demonstrated emotional maturity and thoughtfulness, she could only describe it as "he made me feel like a woman." So we were excited to dissect what that line is between what makes someone feel like a "young" vs "old soul." Thank you for sharing!! We couldn't ignore the role of emotional regulation and empathy in our connections with others. We explored whether immaturity is a symptom of deeper issues like Cluster B personality disorders (borderline personality disorder (BPD), narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), histrionic personality disorder (HPD) and antisocial personality disorder (APD)). We’ll also share personal anecdotes that highlight real struggles faced when dealing with emotionally immature individuals. **Want to share your story with us? Click the link at the top to send us a text. We can't respond directly to that text message for some reason, so leave your email address if you want us to write you back! Resources: Consedine, N. S., & Magai, C. (2006). Emotion development in adulthood: A developmental functionalist review and critique. The Oxford handbook of adult development and learning , 209-244. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Interview with Dr. Blaise Aguirre: Confronting the Shadows of Self-Hatred 1:00:28

20 weeks ago1:00:28

1:00:28

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Do you hate yourself or know someone who does? We delve into the painful reality of people who loathe themselves with Dr. Blaise Aguirre, a distinguished expert in child and adolescent psychiatry at McLean Hospital. We navigate the often-overlooked dimensions of self-loathing, delving into how it manifests in various mental health conditions, particularly borderline personality disorder and suicidality. Dr. Aguirre sheds light on the origins of self-hatred, tracing it back to formative childhood experiences, critical family environments, and societal expectations that can shape a person's self-image. Throughout our discussion, he emphasizes the profound impact of high sensitivity on emotional resilience, illustrating how those with heightened sensitivity often internalize negative messages, leading them to struggle with self-worth. The episode also provides practical insights into healing from self-hatred. We discuss various therapeutic approaches aimed at reframing harmful narratives and fostering self-compassion. Dr. Aguirre’s compassionate insights encourage listeners to shift their perspectives on self-worth and understand the vital role of emotional connections in cultivating a positive self-image. Whether you’re on your own journey toward self-love or seeking to support a loved one grappling with self-hatred, this episode offers both understanding and hope. Resources: Get Dr. Aguirre's new book, "I Hate Myself: Overcoming Self-Loathing and Realize Why You're Wrong About You" Watch Dr. Aguirre's interview on MSNBC Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Navigating the Complex Family Dynamics of a New Marriage 59:00

22 weeks ago59:00

59:00

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Can a new marriage really shake the foundation of a once harmonious family? Maybe if the newcomer is, ahem, emotionally challenging. In today's episode, we respond to a listener who asked for tips on dealing with the toxic behavior of a new family member. "Emma," a Little Helper, sent us a message describing her frustration with her uncle's new marriage following the passing of their beloved aunt. Her extended family is large and close, but this new bride "Mary" interrupts the dynamic with narcissistic, controlling, critical, and jealous behavior. We explore the delicate balance of blending families after the loss of a central family figure, shedding light on how personalities and past dynamics play crucial roles in this transition. As much as we wonder if Mary exhibits Cluster B disordered behavior, we also examine the potential struggles she faces as she steps into the challenging role of matriarch later in life. The family's expectations weigh heavily on her, and we explore how her critical and controlling traits have contributed to the tension. We also question the uncle's role, too, as his perceived lack of assertiveness adds fuel to the fire. Through personal reflections and poignant examples, we highlight the intricate dance of balancing new relationships while respecting longstanding family ties. Finally, we touch on broader themes, including the impact of cluster B traits on family dynamics and the emotional complexity of marrying into a close-knit family. We explore how empathy, understanding, and effective communication can help navigate these turbulent waters. From the gatekeeping behaviors that hinder personal connections to strategies for managing challenging interactions, how do we maintain family harmony amid change and exploring the evolving nature of family dynamics? **Submit your question, requests or comments using the "send us a text" link at the very top! It won't let us respond through the text for some reason so leave your contact info if you want us to respond personally. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

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Exploring Ethical Non-Monogamy: Redefining Commitment and Navigating Open Relationships 1:12:19

23 weeks ago1:12:19

1:12:19

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Is ethical non-monogamy simply a radical departure from tradition, or a return to our more natural relational roots? In this episode, we respond to one of our fans' questions about how to have an open relationship (thank you, fan from Columbia, Missouri!). We share stories and observations from diverse E&M communities, underscoring the vital role of consent and intentionality in successfully navigating these relationships. If any of you want to submit a question or request, tap the "send us a text" link at the top! We take a historical and cultural lens to monogamy, questioning its origins and examining its societal implications. Our discussion draws on comparisons with our primate relatives, the horny bonobos, and challenges the notion of ethical non-monogamy as a radical concept, especially in the face of traditional marriage failure rates. We reflect on the intense expectations placed on partners and the emotional risks involved in opening up a relationship. We redefine commitment beyond the confines of sexual exclusivity, highlighting the potential for deeper, diverse connections. From navigating the potential pitfalls of open relationships to the community support essential for their success, we offer a candid dialogue on the joys and challenges of E&M. Ask yourself- what does commitment means for you? Resources: Fern, J. (2020). Polysecure: Attachment, trauma and consensual nonmonogamy . Thorntree Press LLC. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Interview with Dr. Marina Rosenthal: Unlocking the Secrets of Sexual Health and Intimacy through Sex Therapy 1:05:03

24 weeks ago1:05:03

1:05:03

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Sex shouldn't feel like a chore...unless that's something you're into! In this episode, we welcome back Dr. Marina Rosenthal to talk about sex therapy. Dr. Rosenthal discusses how sex therapy addresses various issues, from erectile dysfunction and pain during sex to navigating non-monogamy and infidelity repair. This approach advocates for expanded definitions of sex to foster fulfilling relationships at every age. We discuss how cultural expectations can create pressure, affecting self-worth and leading to feelings of rejection. By shifting the focus from the frequency of sex to the enjoyment of diverse intimate activities, couples can create a more satisfying and stress-free sexual relationship. Dr. Rosenthal mentions a few examples of how sex therapy techniques are introduced to reduce performance anxiety, encouraging present-moment awareness and enhancing the sexual experience for both partners. As we are wont to do on this podcast, we dive into the rich tapestry of sexual fantasies and their role in relationships, as we discuss cognitive restructuring techniques and the importance of communication between partners. From the complexities of taboo fantasies to the nuances of pornography use, we cover tips for navigating these sensitive topics. We also touch on the impact of trauma on sexual relationships and the pathways to healing. Resources: Dr. Marina Rosenthal's Instagram Dr. Marina Rosenthal's Website "The Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide for Survivors of Sexual Abuse" by Wendy Maltz Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Plastic Surgery: Navigating Self-Love, Societal Pressure, and Body Image 57:36

25 weeks ago57:36

57:36

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Is plastic surgery a sign of self-improvement or a lack of self-love? In this episode, we reflect on this question after both of our (first?) major plastic surgery procedures: Kibby's double mastectomy for breast cancer treatment and Jacqueline’s decision to undergo liposuction. We question societal standards and the stigma surrounding body modifications, challenging the notion that altering one's appearance is inherently negative. We address our evolution of body image as we age, where societal norms and personal perceptions often clash. Jacqueline opens up about her journey from being a reality TV star to and older woman as Kibby shares her major transitions from yoga teacher, to mom, to cancer patient. We reflect on the anxiety of maintaining attractiveness, the social capital tied to beauty, and the transformative periods of life, like pregnancy, that reshape self-identity. This conversation invites listeners to consider the profound impact of external pressures on our inner world. With insights into the correlation between self-esteem and the desire for cosmetic changes, we discuss the often misunderstood belief that altering appearances can reshape personal relationships. Sharing stories of mixed family reactions, the discussion touches on the insecurities and newfound confidence after surgery. We consider the authentic paths toward self-love in a world fixated on physical ideals. Resources: Shridharani, S. M., Magarakis, M., Manson, P. N., & Rodriguez, E. D. (2010). Psychology of plastic and reconstructive surgery: a systematic clinical review. Plastic and reconstructive surgery , 126 (6), 2243-2251. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Situationships, friends with benefits, and other fancy names for sex without commitment 1:04:26

26 weeks ago1:04:26

1:04:26

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) What happens when you have sex with someone you like, get along with, and trust, but don't want to call it a "serious relationship"? In this episode, we explore the types of casual relationships such as friends with benefits and situationships, where the lines between friendship, passion, and intimacy blur. We unravel personal journeys from casual friendships to full-blown romances, tackling controversial ideas like the "Ladder Theory" and how they stack up against real-life experiences. Different perspectives from relationship experts such as Esther Perel and John Gottman offer diverse insights into passion and intimacy within relationships. Whether it's the allure of seduction, the role of alcohol, or the evolutionary aspects of these connections, we dive into all the nuances that make these relationships both appealing and challenging. We also give evidence-based strategies and practical tools to navigate these complex emotional terrains. With the help of KulaMind , our platform offering step-by-step guidance through relationship skills, we emphasize the importance of communication, self-awareness, and clear definitions in fostering healthier relationships. Reflect on your motivations and needs, and learn how to support those around you in their relational journeys. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Navigating Boundaries and Grief: Dr. Caitlin Fang's Journey Through Family Mental Health Challenges 1:10:53

28 weeks ago1:10:53

1:10:53

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) When faced with the heart-wrenching decision to set boundaries with a loved one battling mental health issues, the choice is never easy. Many of us choose to estrange ourselves and cut off contact with difficult parents for our own wellbeing, but we also risk losing them forever. In this special episode, psychotherapist Dr. Caitlin Fang returns to share her deeply personal experiences with her mother, who struggled with depression, substance abuse, and schizoaffective disorder. She takes us through the emotional labyrinth of setting boundaries to protect herself and her child, while navigating the turbulent waters of unresolved grief after her mother's passing. Dr. Fang's story sheds light on the complex dynamics of mental health within families. As she reflects on her upbringing, Caitlin shares insights into how her mother's mental health challenges shaped her resilience and empathy as a therapist. We explore the difficult balance between anger and forgiveness, the emotional tug-of-war of supporting a parent in crisis, and the profound realization of not being able to save a loved one from their struggles. ***Thinking of setting boundaries with a difficult family member or a loved one with mental illness? Book a free call with Dr. Kibby to get the support you need Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

A Little Help For Our Friends

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Breaking Free from Narcissistic Parents: Healing, Self-Worth, and Healthier Relationships 1:04:54

30 weeks ago1:04:54

1:04:54

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) When you grow up in a household where love feels conditional, and your sense of self-worth hinges on meeting impossibly high standards. In this episode, we discuss the challenges faced by those who have navigated life with narcissistic parents. We explore the emotional scars left by such upbringing, including struggles with low self-esteem and attachment issues. We also discuss how our personal and clinical experiences fueled our inspiration to build KulaMind , a community platform dedicated to helping people foster healthier relationships and developing a sense of self-worth coming from a family affected by mental illness. We discuss what narcissistic tendencies can look like in our parents, where societal pressures and a parent's unmet emotional needs often overshadow genuine concern. highlight the universal healing fantasy—a deep-seated longing for unconditional love and understanding from emotionally unavailable parents. This narrative is interwoven with stories of past traumas passed down through generations, emphasizing the need to address these patterns to heal and move forward. With insights drawn from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) principles, we offer practical advice for balancing power and connection in relationships, stressing the importance of vulnerability and empathy. Tune in to discover tools for healing from narcissistic abuse and reclaiming your self-worth. If you are struggling with this yourself, join KulaMind , a supportive community dedicated to guiding you on this transformative journey. * Book a free call with Dr. Kibby to learn more. Resources: Take this quiz to learn more about how narcissistic your parents were to you: Parent Narcissism Quiz Faraji, H., Bilğiş, C., & Darçın, Z. (2024). The Mediator Role of Rejection Sensitivity Between Perceived Maternal Narcissism and Self-disclosure in Romantic Relationship. Turkish Psychological Counseling and Guidance Journal , 14 (72), 37-47. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Surviving the Holidays: Tips for maintaining sanity through family dysfunction 43:42

33 weeks ago43:42

43:42

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Tis the season to be overwhelmed by family dysfunction! The holidays often unravel unresolved family dynamics and we often have to balance time with loved ones and our own sanity. In this episode, we delve into the emotional triggers that resurface during festive gatherings, like feeling like a child again around older relatives. We highlight the contrast between the idealized holiday narrative and the complex reality, especially when trying to set boundaries or deal with family conflicts. We share practical strategies for handling the post-New Year's blues and creating new traditions that embrace diversity and change. Resources: If you need support dealing with family dysfunction, book a free consultation call with cohost Dr. Kibby : https://kulamind.com/onboarding Schneider, E., Liwinski, T., Imfeld, L., Lang, U. E., & Brühl, A. B. (2023). Who is afraid of Christmas? The effect of Christmas and Easter holidays on psychiatric hospitalizations and emergencies—Systematic review and single center experience from 2012 to 2021. Frontiers in psychiatry , 13 , 1049935. Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Digesting the Election: Understanding the Support and Criticism of Trump 59:24

35 weeks ago59:24

59:24

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Well, the results are in: Donald Trump is the president of the United States. Again. This election came with a ton of emotions on either side of the political divide. In a world where differing political views often lead to divisive conflicts, how can we bridge the gap and maintain our relationships? In this episode, we take a deep dive into the complex dynamics surrounding support for controversial figures, with a focus on Trump. We tackle the normalization of toxic masculinity and the cognitive dissonance present among his supporters, while also confronting uncomfortable truths about voting patterns among women. Through our discussion, we aim to unravel how cultural and social tensions shape political affiliations. Ultimately, we argue for using our perspective taking and compassion skills to arrive at mutual understanding between parties. To get support in loving someone with mental illness (like voting for the opposite party as you, haha), join us at KulaMind. Resources: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-social-emotional-brain/202410/why-voters-support-trump-despite-his-alleged-misdeeds?amp Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Interview with Dr. Marina Rosenthal: Strategies for high conflict couples 56:15

37 weeks ago56:15

56:15

Send us a text! (add your email to get a response) Every couple fights sometimes, but what if conflict is the norm in your relationship? High conflict couples tend to fight, shut down, yell, and sometimes even get violent too often. In this episode, we talk to couples therapist and relationship mindset expert Dr. Marina Rosenthal about how high conflict couples can change the way they fight. We talk about the different types of high conflict couples and how to tell if you can save your troubled relationship or need to plan your exit strategy. Dr. Rosenthal also gives us a picture of what hope and healing can look like for a high conflict couple. *** If you are in a relationship with someone struggling with mental or emotional problems, we are building something new to support you at KulaMind. Click here to get early access. Resources: Dr. Marina Rosenthal's website and Instagram What The F**k Did You Just Say To Me?! Take A Break Guide Free Calm Conflict Starter Kit Support the show If you're navigating someone's mental health or emotional issues, join KulaMind, our community and support platform . In KulaMind, we'll help you set healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself, and support your loved one. Follow @kulamind on Instagram for podcast updates and science-backed insights on staying sane while loving someone emotionally explosive. For more info about this podcast, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.com…

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Unveiling the Dark Side: Exploring Sex Trafficking, Power Imbalances, and Abuse in the Celebrity World 54:04

39 weeks ago54:04