EP 228: The Recovery Mindset Shift That Ends All-or-Nothing Food & Body Thinking Forever + The 3 Step Framework to Implement it Just for You!

Her Best Self | Eating Disorder Recovery Podcast, Disordered Eating, Anorexia, Bulimia, Orthorexia, Body Image, Food Freedom, Calorie Counting, Obsessive Exercise, Food Restriction

If you're trapped in the exhausting cycle of all-or-nothing thinking around food and recovery, this episode will revolutionize your entire approach. Fresh back from vacation, Lindsey shares the powerful "Both/And Recovery" strategy that finally breaks you free from black-and-white extremes and helps you find the beautiful gray area where real healing happens.

You'll discover why perfectionist recovery keeps you stuck, learn specific Both/And reframes for common recovery struggles, and walk away with a tangible 3-step practice to implement this week. This isn't about being perfect at recovery—it's about being human while healing.

What You'll Learn

✨ Why all-or-nothing thinking keeps you trapped in recovery cycles
✨ The revolutionary Both/And approach that changes everything
✨ Specific reframes for "good vs. bad" food thinking
✨ How to hold space for fear AND commitment simultaneously
✨ Why the "gray area" is where your freedom actually lives
✨ A practical 3-step method to implement Both/And thinking this week

Key Takeaways The All-or-Nothing Prison

Your brain categorizes everything as perfect or disaster, on-track or off-track, good foods or bad foods. This binary thinking keeps you swinging between extremes and never experiencing the freedom you crave. The space between extremes isn't the danger zone—it's where all the magic happens.

The Both/And Revolution

You can hold two seemingly opposite truths simultaneously, and this is where real healing occurs. Recovery isn't about choosing sides—it's about embracing complexity and being beautifully, imperfectly human.

Why This Changes Everything

The Both/And approach removes the pressure that keeps you stuck. When you stop trying to be perfect at recovery, you actually start recovering. Recovery isn't about eliminating difficult thoughts—it's about learning to hold space for all of it.

Powerful Both/And Recovery Examples Fear & Courage

Instead of: "I have to be brave to start recovery"
Both/And: "I can be both scared of recovery AND committed to it"

Restriction & Nourishment

Instead of: "I either restrict or I'm out of control"
Both/And: "I can both want to restrict AND choose to nourish myself"

Body Image Struggles

Instead of: "I have to love my body all the time"
Both/And: "I can both love my body AND have days when I struggle with it"

Food Morality

Instead of: "Foods are either good or bad"
Both/And: "I can be both 'good' at eating AND have chaotic food days"

Recovery Process

Instead of: "I'm either perfect at recovery or failing"
Both/And: "I can be both in recovery AND not perfect at it"

Weight & Health

Instead of: "I'm either fat or skinny"
Both/And: "I can both be my natural weight AND not love every inch every day"

Structure & Flexibility

Instead of: "I need rigid routine or I'm lost"
Both/And: "I can both crave routine AND need flexibility"

Your Both/And Recovery Practice (This Week) Step 1: Notice Your All-or-Nothing Thoughts

Catch yourself thinking in extremes about food, body, or recovery. Examples:

• "I ruined the day"
• "I'm either on track or off track"
• "I have to be perfect at this"

Step 2: Practice the Both/And Reframe

Transform extreme thoughts with "both/and" language:

• "I both had a challenging food day AND I can nourish myself at my next meal"
• "I both struggled today AND I'm still committed to my healing"

Step 3: Choose Your Next Right Action

From this Both/And space, take one small step toward recovery:

• Eat your next planned meal
• Call a friend for support
• Practice self-compassion instead of self-criticism

Revolutionary Quotes to Remember

"The gray area you've been afraid of? That's not the danger zone—that's where your freedom lives."

"Recovery isn't about eliminating all the difficult thoughts and feelings. Recovery is about learning to hold space for all of it—the fear AND the courage, the struggle AND the strength."

"The moment you stop trying to be perfect at recovery is the moment you actually start recovering."

"You can both feel uncertain about this approach AND try it anyway. You can both be scared of letting go of control AND take one small step toward freedom."

"Your recovery doesn't have to be perfect to be powerful. Your healing doesn't have to be linear to be real."

Personal Story: Post-Vacation Recovery Evolution

Lindsey shares her transformation from post-vacation restriction panic to flexible re-entry into routine. Learn how the Both/And approach allows you to both crave structure AND ease back into real life without rigidity—a perfect metaphor for recovery itself.

The Science Behind Both/And Thinking Why All-or-Nothing Thinking Develops

• Eating disorders thrive on binary thinking
• Perfectionism creates impossible standards
• Black-and-white thoughts feel "safer" but create more suffering

How Both/And Thinking Heals

• Reduces perfectionist pressure
• Allows for human complexity
• Creates space for growth and mistakes
• Normalizes the recovery process

Ready to Live the Both/And Approach?

If this episode resonated but you're unsure how to implement Both/And thinking in your daily recovery, you don't have to figure it out alone.

Take Your Recovery to the Next Level:

In Lindsey's one-on-one coaching, you'll dive deep into applying the Both/And approach to your specific struggles—trigger foods, difficult emotions, body image challenges, all of it. Because knowing about this approach and actually living it are two different things.

Next Steps: Fill out a client application at www.herbestself.co to work together on finding your gray area, your Both/And space, where your real life and real recovery can finally coexist.

Remember: You can both be exactly where you are right now AND be on your way to somewhere beautiful.

Connect With Lindsey

🎙️ Website: www.herbestself.co
📱 Instagram: @thelindseynichol
💌 Email: [email protected]
👥 Private Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com

Share This Episode

If the Both/And approach shifted something for you:

✨ Leave a review sharing how this reframe changed your perspective
✨ Share with a friend who's stuck in all-or-nothing recovery thinking

Remember: You really can move from perfection to purpose, from black-and-white to beautiful gray, from all-or-nothing to Both/And.

Your beautifully imperfect recovery journey starts now.

xo, lindsey

Ready for Recovery Coaching?

Lindsey offers personalized recovery coaching for women ready to do the work. If you're in the "messy middle" and feel stuck despite listening to inspirational content, working with someone who's walked the path could be your game changer.

Next Steps:

• Visit www.herbestself.co
• Fill out the client application
• See if you're a good fit for coaching
• If not the right match, Lindsey will connect you with other qualified coaches on her team or additional resources to support you along your journey to freedom
  * While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.