Stop Carrying Their Healing Journey: How to Support Without Losing Yourself

Lemon Balm Coaching

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Ever caught yourself pouring every ounce of your being into helping someone who simply wasn't ready to change? That gut-wrenching feeling when you can clearly see their potential, know exactly what would help them, yet nothing shifts? That emotional exhaustion isn't just in your head—it's real, and it's draining your precious energy.
When we invest more energy into someone else's healing than they invest in themselves, we're setting up a painful dynamic that serves nobody. Drawing from personal experience and professional coaching expertise, this episode dives deep into why we feel compelled to "fix" others and what's really happening when we try. That urge to control others' healing journey isn't random—it's actually a survival technique hardwired into our brains, telling us that if our loved ones aren't okay, somehow we won't be either.
I share vulnerable stories from my own life, including my experience as a caretaker for my diabetic father and working through my struggle with anxiety when I tried taking on my husband's problems as my own. These raw examples illuminate the fundamental truth at the heart of all transformation: it must come from within. No amount of external pressure, no matter how well-intentioned, can force someone to change who isn't ready.
But this doesn't leave us powerless. We can learn to "hold space" rather than push solutions, offer encouragement instead of enforcement, and set healthy boundaries that protect our energy while still allowing us to care deeply. The shift from being a "fixer" to becoming a "supporter" not only preserves your wellbeing but often creates the exact environment where others feel safe enough to begin their own healing journey.
If you've been carrying the emotional weight of someone else's choices, this episode offers practical tools to reclaim your energy without losing your compassion. Remember, what's yours is yours, and what's theirs is theirs. Your energy is too precious to misplace—let's redirect it where it truly serves.

Download 5 Ways to Stop Misplacing Energy HERE

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Music by Adipsia

Chapters

1. When You Care More Than They Do (00:00:00)

2. Control Is A Survival Technique (00:05:30)

3. True Transformation Comes From Within (00:11:10)

4. Signs You're Misplacing Your Energy (00:19:27)

5. Holding Space Over Pushing Solutions (00:26:40)

6. From Fixer To Supporter (00:31:40)