Weaponized Incompetence: When 'I Can't' Means 'I Won’t

Women's Mental Health Podcast

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In this episode of The Women’s Mental Health Podcast, we explore weaponized incompetence—how emotional labor and the mental load are quietly crushing women behind closed doors. Join licensed therapists Randi Owsley, LMSW and Jessica Bullwinkle, LMFT as they unpack why so many women feel alone, burned out, and stuck carrying the emotional weight in their relationships. Whether you're the default parent, navigating relationship stress, or trying to reclaim your identity, this episode offers relatable insights and coping tools to protect your mental health and prioritize self-care.

Get information on weaponized incompetence—a subtle yet damaging form of emotional manipulation where one partner avoids responsibility by pretending they’re incapable. Learn more about coping skills and tools you can use to manage emotional labor and protect your mental well-being. Whether you're feeling burned out from carrying the mental load in relationships or struggling to set boundaries, you'll find practical resources to help you regain balance, reduce resentment, and prioritize your own self-care.

In upcoming episodes of The Women’s Mental Health Podcast, we’ll dive deeper into powerful and often overlooked topics that impact women every day. We’ll unpack the realities of emotional labor and the mental load, explore coping skills for stress and overwhelm, and talk candidly about relationship burnout. Expect honest conversations about self-care that actually works, what it means when women feel alone, and how to navigate identity struggles in motherhood, career, and beyond. If you're craving validation, support, and real tools to feel more like you again—you won’t want to miss what’s coming.

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What is weaponized incompetence?

How do I know if I’m experiencing weaponized incompetence?

Is weaponized incompetence intentional or subconscious?

How does weaponized incompetence affect mental health?

What are some common examples of weaponized incompetence?

What’s the difference between genuine incompetence and weaponized incompetence?

How should I respond to weaponized incompetence?

Can weaponized incompetence be a form of gaslighting?

How does weaponized incompetence show up in parenting

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The Women’s Mental Health Podcast, hosted by licensed therapists Randi Owsley MSW and Jessica Bullwinkle LMFT, PMH-C, offers educational and entertaining mental health content. This is not therapy or a substitute for professional care. No therapeutic relationship is formed by listening or engaging. Some links may be affiliate links, which may earn us a small commission at no extra cost to you.