33 - The Hierarchy of Soothing: A Gentle Guide for Sleep-Deprived Parents

Doula Talk: Postpartum, Babies and the Battle for Sleep

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In this heartfelt and empowering episode of Doula Talk, Deb Jimenez unpacks a question she hears almost daily from tired parents: “How do I help my baby sleep without sleep training?” If you’ve found yourself contact-napping around the clock or bouncing on an exercise ball like it’s your second job, this one’s for you.

Deb introduces her signature 12-step Hierarchy of Soothing—a gentle, responsive framework that guides families from full-contact sleep support to more independent sleep without using harsh methods, strict schedules, or cry-it-out techniques. This isn’t traditional sleep training. It’s about creating rhythm, reducing input gradually, and honoring both your baby’s need for connection and your need for rest.

She walks listeners through each step, from holding and feeding to sleep, all the way to independent sleep, using relatable examples and realistic expectations. Throughout, Deb reassures parents that progress is not linear, that every baby is different, and that bonding, attachment, and sleep can absolutely coexist.

Listeners will feel seen and supported as Deb shares:

• When and how to introduce gradual changes (hint: it’s not too early, and you’re not “spoiling” your baby)
• Why most families get stuck around the feed-to-sleep phase—and how to gently shift from there
• How to use tools like proximity, voice, motion, and eventually space to encourage self-soothing without tears or guilt
• The importance of the “sleepy scale” (and what a 6–7 actually looks like when laying baby down)

Deb also normalizes the reality that parents may move forward, skip steps, or even go backward on the ladder. “That’s not failure,” she says, “that’s just real life.” Her approach is steeped in flexibility and empathy—reminding listeners that sleep doesn’t have to be all-or-nothing, and they don’t have to figure it all out alone.

💛 Free Resource Alert!

Listeners can download Deb’s free Hierarchy of Soothing Guide—a visual, easy-to-follow roadmap with tips for each step—at DoulaDeb.com. It’s perfect to screenshot for those 2 a.m. check-ins.

🌿 Want More Support?

Deb also introduces her Rooted Rest Sleep Course, an 8-week program for babies and toddlers up to 3 years old. The course includes optional live Q&As, flexible routines, and step-by-step guidance to help families move toward sustainable, connected sleep—without compromising their values. Learn more at DoulaDeb.com/rooted-rest.

If you’re a parent longing for better sleep but overwhelmed by traditional advice, this episode is a must-listen. With her signature warmth, humor, and clinical wisdom, Deb offers a path forward that feels both doable and deeply respectful.

✨ Because everybody sleeps eventually—and you don’t have to

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Thank you for listening! Tune in next time for more insights and support on your parenting journey.
Contact Information:
Doula Deb: www.DoulaDeb.com
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Disclaimer:
The content in this podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider for personalized advice and information.

Chapters

1. 33 - The Hierarchy of Soothing: A Gentle Guide for Sleep-Deprived Parents (00:00:00)

2. Understanding Newborn Sleep Needs (00:01:54)

3. A Note about Newborns (00:02:03)

4. The Hierarchy of Soothing Explained (00:03:13)

5. Navigating the Steps to Independent Sleep (00:09:36)

6. Conclusion and Resources for Parents (00:11:59)

7. So Can I Sleep Train a Newborn? (00:12:56)

8. Download the Hierarchy of Soothing (00:13:44)