Why Safety Can Feel Scary After Trauma (Simplified)

Regulate & Rewire: An Anxiety & Depression Podcast

This is a simplified version of the conversation we had last week about how it's common for trauma survivors to feel anxious or scared when they finally experience moments of calm or regulation. This episode explores why this paradoxical response happens and offers gentle ways to help your nervous system learn that regulation doesn't have to mean danger. We dive into the "safety-danger equation" and how to build your capacity for feeling safe, one small moment at a time.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why your nervous system might interpret safety as a threat after trauma.
• How past experiences can make you feel like you've "lost your ability to protect yourself" when you relax.
• Practical strategies to start feeling safer with regulation, even when it’s uncomfortable.

3 Takeaways:

1. Feeling anxious when calm isn't a sign you're broken; it's a learned protective response from past trauma.
2. Your nervous system is always balancing "cues of safety" against "cues of danger"—trauma can make safety feel unfamiliar and thus threatening.
3. You can teach your nervous system that safety is okay by starting with small, anchored moments of regulation and validating your protective instincts.

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