The Hidden Cost of Perfectionism: Why You Never Feel Good Enough with Ellen Hendriksen

The One You Feed

In this episode, Ellen Hendriksen discusses the hidden costs of perfectionism and why you never feel good enough. She shares the various ways perfectionism disguises itself as a positive trait—when in reality, it can lead to self-criticism, procrastination, and emotional exhaustion. Ellen also explains why perfectionism is less about being perfect and more about never feeling good enough, how self-acceptance is the antidote, and why procrastination is actually an emotional regulation problem (not a time management issue).

Key Takeaways:

• (01:02) – Perfectionism isn’t about being perfect—it’s about never feeling good enough
• (03:26) – The two wolves of perfectionism: Conscientiousness vs. Self-Criticism
• (07:36) – Overevaluation: When self-worth gets tangled with performance
• (16:57) – Guided Drift: Mr. Rogers’ surprising philosophy on perfection and mistakes
• (26:51) – The power of self-compassion: You don’t need to be perfect to be worthy
• (39:40) – Emotional Perfectionism: The toxic belief that you “shouldn’t” feel a certain way
• (43:59) – Why procrastination is actually about emotion management—not time management
• (50:46) – How to release past mistakes and stop ruminating over failures

For full show notes, click here!

If you enjoyed this episode with Ellen Hendriksen, check out these other episodes:

How to Overcome Perfectionism and Create Your Best Work with David Kadavy

How to Manage Social Anxiety and The Inner Critic with Ellen Hendriksen

Being a Procrastinator with Tim Pychyl

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