PAGEANT INTERVIEW: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG (probably)

Confessions of a Pageant King

#Self-Improvement #Podcasting Education #I help pageant queens win in pageantry AND in life #I help pageant queens win in pageantry #After Life #Year Old

32:12

DaQuane Cherry was once the kid who wore a hoodie to hide skin flare-ups in school. Now he’s an artist and advocate helping others feel seen. He reflects on his psoriasis journey, the power of small joys, and why loving yourself first isn’t a cliché—it’s essential. Plus, a deep dive into the history of La Roche-Posay’s legendary spring. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.…

about a year ago 38:22

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460 episodes

Confessions of a Pageant King

PAGEANT INTERVIEW: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG (probably)

Confessions of a Pageant King

published about a year ago

MP3•Episode home

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.thepageantproject.com/subscribe

460 episodes

#Self-Improvement #Podcasting Education #I help pageant queens win in pageantry AND in life #I help pageant queens win in pageantry #After Life #Year Old

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Confessions of a Pageant King

1
The 7 Deadly Pageant Sins 25:01

24 hours ago25:01

25:01

Each week, I share no-fluff pageant coaching to help you lead, speak, and leave a legacy. With 300+ interviews and coaching across Miss Universe, Miss USA, and Miss America, this isn’t theory—it’s what works. https://thepageantproject.com/subscribe This week, we’re discussing some of the most common — and costly — mistakes experienced competitors make. These aren’t beginner errors. In fact, most of them appear productive on the surface. But they often lead to stagnation, burnout, or disconnection from the very reason you began competing in the first place. The list that follows is not about shame, blame, or making you feel bad for doing it "wrong". It’s about awareness. Because when you're stuck despite doing "everything right," the problem usually isn’t effort — it’s misdirected effort. Here are the seven patterns that may be holding you back: 1. You're in the Wrong System System alignment is one of the most overlooked factors in long-term success. Each pageant system has its own priorities. If you’re constantly adjusting your style, message, or personality to fit a system, the issue may not be your preparation — it may be the system itself. Just because a friend found success in a particular system doesn’t mean it will suit you. Take a look at the kind of titleholders that system rewards. What do they value? What kind of advocacy do they support? Does their mission align with yours — or are you just chasing the metaphorical views? Research and observation can help, but there’s no substitute for firsthand experience. If you’re forcing it, it may not be the right fit. The right system should complement your strengths, not suppress them. 2. You're Still Chasing Applause Very few people consciously admit they’re seeking validation. But when a competitor insists that a title is the only way to build a platform, grow visibility, or be taken seriously, it’s usually a sign that validation is driving the decision. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be recognized — the problem is when recognition becomes the only goal. That’s when it starts to erode your motivation and distort your choices. If you're constantly hoping that the next win will make you feel worthy, confident, or successful, it won’t. It just moves the finish line. Titles can open doors, but they’re not prerequisites for impact. If your mission is genuine, you can begin now — without a crown. Validation-driven competition often leads to disappointment, no matter the outcome. 3. You're Thinking Too Much Research is useful. Strategy is helpful. But taken too far, both become counterproductive. Overthinking leads to paralysis and predictability — the opposite of what resonates with judges and audiences. There’s a tipping point where preparation becomes performance — and not the good kind. Instead of showing up fully present, you show up rehearsed. Instead of answering questions from the heart, you search for the “correct” answer. And ironically, this quest for perfection makes you forgettable. There is no perfect formula. Your preparation should inform your performance, not replace your presence. If you’re relying on planning to manufacture confidence, it may be time to let go of the script, at least a little bit. 4. You're Majoring in the Minors Wardrobe, stage presence, and styling matter — but not at the expense of your substance. If 80% of your time is spent choosing a gown and only 20% is spent refining your advocacy or communication, it’s likely your priorities are misaligned. What tips the scales for judges isn’t a dress or a walk — it’s a presence, a story, a mission that feels deeply rooted and personally meaningful. The elements that feel safest to prepare are often the least transformative. Real growth comes from doing the uncomfortable work: improving your speaking skills, clarifying your advocacy, and confronting your own blind spots. Judges can’t see how many hours you spent preparing a look. But they can sense whether your message is rehearsed or real. Invest more in the areas that carry over beyond the pageant — public speaking, networking, clarity of purpose. 5. You're Not Living — You're Just Competing A compelling competitor draws from a rich, meaningful life. If pageantry is the only thing on your calendar — and your only source of fulfillment — your relatability and credibility suffer. You can’t connect with an audience when you have nothing real to pull from. Your platform will lack weight if it’s based on ideas, not experience. Ask yourself: what would my life look like without pageantry? If that thought leaves you uneasy, you may be too reliant on the crown to feel complete. Evaluate your well-being across three key areas: health, wealth/career, and relationships. The stronger these foundations, the stronger your platform. The most effective titleholders are those who bring something substantive to the stage, not those who rely on it for meaning. 6. You're Overcoached Good coaching amplifies your voice. Overcoaching replaces it. When every move, answer, and expression is filtered through multiple external opinions, the result is usually a loss of authenticity. If you struggle to make decisions without guidance, it may be time to rebuild your trust in your own instincts. You don’t need a full-time coach on speed dial. Some competitors thrive with one or two check-in sessions, others prefer more structure. But if you can’t hear your own voice anymore — if every answer sounds like it came from a pageant playbook — it’s time to hit pause and re-evaluate. The goal isn’t to avoid feedback. It’s to ensure you don't lose your own voice in your preparation. 7. You Don't Know When to Stop Competing endlessly isn’t a sign of passion. Sometimes, it’s a sign of avoidance. If your résumé hasn’t evolved, your advocacy hasn’t deepened, or your goals remain static — a pause may be more powerful than persistence. It may take more courage as well. Pageantry isn’t like traditional sports, where more repetition automatically builds skill. It’s a platform for showcasing growth. If you’re not actively growing, more competition won’t help. Stepping away — temporarily or permanently — doesn’t mean failure. It means you’re giving yourself space to grow into the best titleholder you can be. And if you do return, it will be with renewed clarity and purpose. If any of these resonated, take it as an opportunity — not a judgment. You may not need another title. You might simply need perspective. Because the goal isn’t just the crown. It’s the person you become in pursuit of it. Timestamps * 0:00 What are the 7 Deadly Pageant Sins? * 01:07 – Sin #1: You're in the Wrong System * 03:40 – Sin #2: You're Still Chasing Applause * 06:43 – Sin #3: You're Thinking Too Much * 09:29 – Sin #4: You're Majoring in the Minors * 13:21 – Sin #5: You're Not Living — You're Just Competing * 16:44 – Sin #6: You're Overcoached * 20:32 – Sin #7: You Don't Know When to Stop * 24:01 – Final Thoughts and Self-Awareness If you're looking for personalised coaching, I offer a limited number of private sessions. It’s for women who want tailored strategy, mindset support, and real accountability—on stage and beyond. https://thepageantproject.com/coaching Pageantry is evolving—and you deserve coaching that’s more than surface-level. Join us if you're ready to go beyond the crown. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.thepageantproject.com/subscribe…

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
#305 Caroline Jones Interview 1:11:56

1 day ago1:11:56

1:11:56

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
I Thought Pageant Talents Were Cringe… I Was Wrong 14:06

8 days ago14:06

14:06

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
#304 Marisa Brown Interview 1:12:10

8 days ago1:12:10

1:12:10

Each week, I share no-fluff pageant coaching to help you lead, speak, and leave a legacy. With 300+ interviews and coaching across Miss Universe, Miss USA, and Miss America, this isn’t theory—it’s what works. https://thepageantproject.com/subscribe About Marisa Marisa Brown, Miss Capital City Volunteer, will be competing for the title of Miss South Carolina Volunteer this July. She is a rising senior at the University of South Carolina in Columbia, majoring in Mass Communications with a cognate in Health, Promotion, Education, and Behavior. She is also double minoring in Dance and Entrepreneurship. At just nine years old, Marisa developed an eating disorder—a struggle that resurfaced at nineteen as a result of unhealthy approaches to fitness and wellness. Her disorder robbed her of many things, including her joy, which had always been one of her most defining qualities. It wasn’t until she began her recovery at nineteen that she fully understood the physical and emotional toll she had endured. Determined to reclaim control, she made the decision to stop letting food dictate her life. From that turning point came her S.E.R.V.E. Initiative: Fueling Freedom—Healing Our Relationships with Food. The mission of Fueling Freedom is to help young girls and women understand eating disorders, recognize the body's need for nourishment, and develop a kinder relationship with both their bodies and their minds. Marisa believes that true beauty begins within. When someone knows who they are and is confident in their accomplishments, they begin to see and appreciate their outer beauty. Through Fueling Freedom, she is working to make this vision a reality—empowering young women to align their heads and hearts and take the first step toward healing, because it all starts in the mind. https://www.instagram.com/_misscapitalcityvolsc/ Timestamps * 0:00 – Intro: Meet Marisa, her titles, studies, and what drives her * 1:10 – Bananas, peaches, and pageants: a lighthearted Southern start * 5:07 – Why pageantry? From being overlooked to empowered * 9:35 – How her eating disorder began and what triggered it * 17:42 – The turning point: relapse at 19 and toxic prep culture * 22:50 – Starting therapy and learning to choose vulnerability * 31:50 – Creating Fueling Freedom and helping others heal * 39:15 – What healthy eating and mindset look like today * 43:30 – Faith, purpose, and what “fearfully and wonderfully made” means to her * 58:20 – Final 10 Questions: quirks, wisdom, and what she wants to be remembered for Want more than the episode? If you're looking for personalised coaching, I offer a limited number of private sessions. It’s for women who want tailored strategy, mindset support, and real accountability—on stage and beyond. https://thepageantproject.com/coaching Pageantry is evolving—and you deserve coaching that’s more than surface-level. Join us if you're ready to go beyond the crown. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.thepageantproject.com/subscribe…

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
#303 Leah Kennedy Interview 1:02:02

10 days ago1:02:02

1:02:02

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
Pageants, Mental Health, & Pet Peeves 49:09

15 days ago49:09

49:09

Confessions of a Pageant King

5 weeks ago58:42

58:42

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
#300 Grace Herdelin interview 1:12:50

5 weeks ago1:12:50

1:12:50

Confessions of a Pageant King

1
New Book Announcement 14:17

5 weeks ago14:17

14:17

Each week, I share no-fluff pageant coaching to help you lead, speak, and leave a legacy. With 300+ interviews and coaching across Miss Universe, Miss USA, and Miss America, this isn’t theory—it’s what works. https://thepageantproject.com/subscribe So here's the tea: I'm writing a book. Again. But this time it's not another volume of "Confessions of a Pageant Queen." This book is different. It's a beginner's guide to pageantry. A literal A to Z for someone who has never stepped foot in the world of crowns and sashes. Now, before you roll your eyes and say, "But Adrian, most of us watching this already do pageants,"—I know. This isn’t for you. But you know you’re the first one to convince your best friend, your cousin, your barista, and that one random girl at yoga class to sign up for a pageant. And when you do, they come running to you, eyes wide and confused AF. This book is for them . And maybe a little bit for you too, because explaining the difference between an at-large title and an appointed one for the fifteenth time is exhausting. Because Pageants Don't Come With a Manual Let me take you back. I'm from Sydney, Australia. Not exactly the mecca of pageantry. When I first dipped a toe into this sparkly pool, I was overwhelmed. No clue what the local-to-state-to-national-to-international pipeline was. And don't even get me started on how there could be three girls from Australia competing at the same international pageant with titles like Miss Oceania and Miss South Pacific. I was like, huh?! And the categories? I mean, I understood evening gown and swimsuit. But "fun fashion"? What are we doing—playing dress-up at recess? Then there’s the two-minute interviews, the different walks for every segment, and let’s not forget the minefield that is pageant terminology. It was like learning a new language with zero Duolingo. That’s why I wanted to write a book that would give newbies a lay of the land. Not to turn them into seasoned pros overnight, but to reduce that “what the actual hell is going on” factor. The Case Against (Most) Coaches Here’s a spicy take: not everyone needs a coach. And a lot of so-called “coaches” shouldn’t be coaching. Just because someone did one pageant or posts inspirational quotes on Instagram doesn’t mean they’re qualified to take your money. I’ve seen it too many times—first-timers pouring hundreds (or thousands) into coaching before they even know if pageantry is their thing. And for what? Tips on how to walk when you still can't walk in heels? Interview coaching when stringing a sentence together is a struggle? My advice? Just enter. See what it’s like. Then if you love it and want to level up, that’s when coaching might make sense. But for that first plunge, you don’t need to overcomplicate it. This book is here to help you do well enough that you don’t walk off stage swearing never to do it again. Safety, Scandals, and the Sensible Middle Ground Look, pageantry isn’t perfect. If you think it's going to fix all the problems in your life, it won’t. If you think it's a sexist relic that needs to be cancelled, you're missing the point. I'm in the middle. There are incredible opportunities in this industry—but there are also red flags. Scandals. Extortionate contracts. Draconian NDAs. Judging inconsistencies. These things matter, especially for young women stepping into this world for the first time. This book isn’t here to scare anyone, but it is here to make you aware. A little knowledge can save a lot of heartbreak. And hopefully, it’ll help keep more people safe, informed, and empowered as they step onto the stage. A Quick, Digestible Read—Because No One Has Time for Fluff I’m writing this to be short, sharp, and fluff-free. You should be able to read it over a couple of lunch breaks or knock it out in a weekend. Each chapter will be its own bite-sized nugget of wisdom—no filler, no nonsense. And if you're interested in helping me shape it, I’m looking for beta readers. People who can give honest feedback—what to add, what to cut, what made no sense whatsoever. Shoot me an email and I’ll send you a PDF of the draft once it’s ready. No charge, just your thoughts in return. One Resource to Rule Them All This book is the first piece of something bigger I’m building with The Pageant Project—a hub of real, useful resources for pageant contestants at every level. After hundreds of interviews and thousands of conversations, it’s time to centralise that knowledge. So whether you’re a beginner, a veteran, a coach, or just someone who keeps getting asked “How do I even start with pageants?”—this book is for you. And yes, I will be chained to my laptop until it’s done. Wish me luck. And if you want in on the beta reader list, you know where to find me. If you're looking for personalised coaching, I offer a limited number of private sessions. It’s for women who want tailored strategy, mindset support, and real accountability—on stage and beyond. https://thepageantproject.com/coaching Pageantry is evolving—and you deserve coaching that’s more than surface-level. Join us if you're ready to go beyond the crown. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.thepageantproject.com/subscribe…

Confessions of a Pageant King

4 years ago8:35